my boyfriend treats me like i have cheated on him a million times. i never have. but he is really jealous and controlling. he even tells me what family members to talk to. i am not ALLOWED to talk to any guys and if i do i am a whore. he has a really bad temper . but usually takes it out on someone else . Brothers , mother. he cusses alot and i find him lying to me. i feel so sad at times. he even tries to controll my thoughts he asks me who i am thinking about all the time and when i say no one he says youre lying . and if i get off the phone to do something and dont call back right away and tell him everything i did including bathing or so on i am accused of doing something wrong. he asks me all the time are you doing something wrong. its driving me crazy.
2007-05-01 02:24:26 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
hi hon...
this guy has real issues -- he's controlling and rather toxic.
don't question your feelings... this is a no-brainer... take care of YOU and do what is best for you.
doesn't seem you need someone like this guy in your life. he's not a very nice or trusting person.
i'd be crazy too...
2007-05-01 02:29:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A relationship is one where both partners love and respect each other and strive to bring out the best in each other. Your BF is the typical case of a insecure guy who checks up and abuses his girlfriend to feel better . Everyone here will tell u the same thing, break the relationship and move on. Emotional abusers usually act very nice when you threaten break up and become assertive , so they can win you back, but they will start abusing once you come back.This wont change. Move out, preferably to another place or to parents where he cant come chasing you. trust me, you will forget this in a few years and can form better relationships. All the best hon, you can do it.
2007-05-01 02:39:20 · answer #2 · answered by Socrates 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
question 1: Why are you still with him ? You should be leaving him the moment when he emotionally abused you.
question 2 : You should be brave enough to ask for a break up & if he threatens you, tell him that i will report to the police for harressment. Do not be afraid of him.
He has no right, imagine now the status as GF only, what happens when you are married to him ? Phyiscal abuse !!!! Wake up lady .
As a man i also cannot stand the way he treats you. If needs tell your family & ask your family male member to accompany you.
2007-05-01 02:32:50 · answer #3 · answered by GUYVER P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Red flags darlin, lots and lots of red flags. Whether you park on the left side of the driveway or not, he will still be insecure. In the beginning its very flattering----but it will exaust you. Say a prayer. Listen to the voice inside. Then do this----- make a decision to drive to his house a different way---see what happens. Make a decision to take yourself out for some pampering----get your hair done at a new salon for example---see what happens. Spend a day away with your mom or a good friend----if you are thinking there is NO way---you may need a restraining order.... get a counselor to talk with to help you outline the steps you need to take to protect yourself to and get ou t.
2007-05-01 02:42:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him!!!! he's obviously a manipulative, insecure control freak. This could turn out to be dangerous, because one day he might take out his frustration on you and not just in a verbal way. I would suggest you leave him immediately and tell him to get some help. This isn't a healthy mental state for anyone. Also if there's no trust in the realtionship then its not a successful relationship, especially if u have not given him any reason to doubt you. The best for both of you would be to end this relationship before it gets worse.
2007-05-01 02:32:00 · answer #5 · answered by * SeñørITA * 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mistakes are to learn from, not die from! You made a mistake and that doesn't make YOU the MISTAKE. Forgive yourself and get a lesson from what you experienced. Obviously you are a girl with good moral fiber or this would not bother you that you had sex with a man without feeling attached. Also the fact you didn't feel anything makes me believe you become a victim to men during a sexual encounter and the wounded little girl in you can't refuse to, but also can't like it either. You need to be in therapy with a woman therapist who specializes in childhood trauma effects. You are not nasty or dirty. You are confused and suffering from childhood scars. It is effecting your now. Please don't let grandpa get away with the harm he has done to you, fight back by getting well.
2016-05-17 23:28:55 · answer #6 · answered by cleopatra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out your track shoes and run away from him. That's not love, it's a dangerous kind of obsession. He may not be physically abusing you but he is mentally and emotionally battering you. Before you run, make sure you have a safetly plan in place - a place to go where he can't get to you, a restraining order if need be. If you are still at home talk to your parents if not talk to a counsellor at a shelter for abused women, they will let you know what to do to free yourself. Once you are free don't ever go back - he'll promise and try to get you back , but you have to be strong and resist it.
2007-05-01 02:32:06 · answer #7 · answered by workingclasshero 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh my god.dat is such a torture.i think u shud not think 4 a sec about ur brkup n jst do it right away.trust is d main thing which needs to b ther in a relationship,wich u dnt hav.n u cant thing of this relationship 2 b long term n if u do den i think it wud b a big mistake.i am really sorry 4 saying this but this relationship has got nthing,no trust,no luv,no emotional security.so plz dnt carry on wid it.it will brk u emotionally. tc n i hpe evrything grts better soon
2007-05-01 02:34:41 · answer #8 · answered by mannat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, are you dating my ex? It took me a long time and a lot of pain to realize I was in an emotionally abusive relationship, which P.S. you are in. This jealousy won't pass and you will not be happy or feel independent. You are his prisoner, emotionally. It's as if he picks open old wounds with one hand only to soothe the pain with the other hand, using power and manipulation to control you. Also, he could be cheating on you, indicative of his accusations of you (which my ex also did and was cheating on me with several girls). Get out while you still of some of yourself left.
2007-05-01 02:33:15 · answer #9 · answered by Svetlana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just need to tell him flat out that you are your own person and not an object to be controlled. You shoulf have every right to casually talk to any guy. If he is like the way you describe him then you might wanna break it up over the phone. You definitely need to end it and find someone who will care for you and accept you for who you are
2007-05-01 02:29:24 · answer #10 · answered by darthdawson 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh i feel sorry for you hun, i think your bf loves u so much that he cant afford to lose u.Besides u are perhaps so beautiful that he feels insecure with guys around you Most guys with this kinda attitude has for once or twice been hurt badly by a lady they loved so they develop strict strategies on the next one.Tell him to marry you so he will feel a bit secured. My ex had a similar attitude and i had to let go because i dont want to feel controlled but still he threatens any guy around me.
2007-05-01 02:35:53 · answer #11 · answered by BeautyBreak H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋