Would you let your kids around this type of people just because they are family?

Question

-they know that I won't let them preach to my kids so they 'show' my kids with their actions and lifestyle how 'the right way to live' is
-they tell my kids what they 'should, must and ought' to do
-they are fear based and caution my children and cause them to second guess themselves
-they dismiss my chilrens feeling and opinions (and sometimes their precence)
-they are perfectionists and don't let my kid make mistakes without making them feel bad or guilty (again with the 'shoulds and oughts')
-they are really fun and apporving to my kids, and then when my kids do something that crosses their personal opinion, they withdraw the approval and act shocked and give disapproval


-When I ask them to stop, they get upset with me and blame me for raising my kids in a way that I will 'have consequenes'. According to them my 7 year old already has signs of teenage rebellion. My kids are happy, imaginative, do well in school, very well behaved and have great manners.

they try to be really fun and upbeat so my kids will love them and think they are awesome. When I don't let my kids see them alot, they threaten me with 'conseqences'. They say my children are hurting because I don't let them be close and it is all my fault. Would you let your kids with these people?

Answer 1

I would immediately separate them from those people. They have no right to teach your children what they have to learn if you don't want to teach them that. When they get older, then they can decide how they want to leave. They will end up hurting you child's feeling so it will be better to but a stop to it. I was raised with rules but was not forced into believe something. They let me have a choice of religion and university I wanted to go to. I love my parents for that because unlike my cousins, I have an open mind and am not as closed minded as them. I also enjoy my life and don't regret any choice I have made.

Answer 2

which would be a unfavorable (except it became right into a o.k. trusted relative or chum)! there became right into a community tale a pair of weeks in the past some daycare service left the youngsters interior the van on a similar time as she purchase tickets...all of them died different than one, and the little female that survived has ideas injury. I basically does not probability it. You by no skill be attentive to what individuals will think of and do. a minimum of till when you get to be attentive to her, see how she handles stress, if she is prepared, verify her employing record,etc. Is she insured to be employing around teenagers? If something could take place, could her coverage pay for medical interest? those are the styles of issues to think of of.... good success!

Answer 3

Who can say? Frankly, all we're getting is YOUR opinion, your side of the story only.
Funny, my in-laws say the same thing about me and my lady that you say about yours. And yet, it's my in-laws kids who are the problem; they are rude, ill-mannered; have been taught by their parents (the same in-laws) that they can do anything they want, even stealing from stores and friends, and disrespecting adults. When they visit their Aunt and me, and we attempt to impose some discipline and teach them some manners, their mother says we are "stifling their freedom to be kids," and that their kids are "happy and energetic" as an excuse to let them run wild at all hours.
HAH, what crap! And then they wonder why their oldest daughter, who is all of 12, is already sexually active with her friends in "the 'Hood."
Now, if your in-laws are trying to impose their religious beliefs on your kids, by all means they have no right to do that. BUT, if your in-laws are simply trying to teach your kids some manners and discipline, you should be grateful they care enough to try.

Answer 4

We have family like that, we do limit contact and if the "shoulds" start or the preaching starts, we leave. We are not Christian and some of our family crosses that fundamental line and we laid out our rules:
No mention of Hell
It is okay to share your religion, but only the positive, no condemnation or sin ("Jesus loves you" is okay, "Jesus doesn't like..." is not.)
No reading from the Bible, that book is just too much for little ones, the murder, the rape, the violence.
If you choose to break the rules, we leave.

Sometimes they try to sneak stuff past us but they understand better that we want our kids to be able to choose for themselves and if you try approaching your situation that way, maybe it'll help you.

We believe in respect and love to teach instead of punishments etc and our kids are well behaved and very respectful too.

Answer 5

you don't really give good examples of what the kids are doing to what the adults come back with. The way you right it it makes you think of your own examples. for example. Your child chews with his mouth open. They say he shouldn't do that. Is this the type of thing??? If so then thats fine. You need to give specific examples

Answer 6

Sounds to me they are acting like "adults" would act. If your kids are doing well, imaginative, and thriving then it would seem the way they behave is not effecting the kids as much as it is effecting you.

Seems to me you are trying to make normal, caring adult behavior towards your children into something wrong and evil. For example, where you said they are fear based and caution your children making them second guess themselves. Ummm.... isn't that what a normal parent does. We warn our kids of the consequences of their actions to make them think and make wiser decision in their lives??

They seem to want your kids to do well. They are willing to let them know when they disapprove of things (which is normal for any adult who cares for a child). They are willing to have fun with the kids and seem to want to be in their lives. It seems you are the one with the problem and you are trying to project the issues you are having onto your kids. Stop it! If they are doing as well as you say then the family members aren't causing any damage to them! But you could cause damage by interfering and trying to keep them from these family members.

Answer 7

If you are happy with your kids, tell them to back off! People aren't perfect, kids definitely aren't perfect, and they have no right trying to show or tell your kids anything without your approval. Hence why they are YOUR kids.

Answer 8

I would let my kids decide.... if they still feel good after they have left their house, then they will want to come back. If they don't feel good, they won't want to go back. Be careful you aren't projecting your feelings on to your children.

Answer 9

You gave birth to them, and your have the right to raise them anyway you want to. If they can't respect you as their parent then they should stay away.

Answer 10

No, I will not. Tell them to stay away from your kids. They have no right to do those things to your kids. Those kids are not theirs.