2007-04-30 09:07:30 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Yes. I sometimes feel guilty about that, more so towards my husband because they are his children. However, my stepchildren do not live with me, so it's hard to have a strong bond with them. My children are my flesh and blood and I cared for them during pregnancy and after birth. I don't believe there is any bond stronger than a mother and her child.
2007-04-30 09:11:34 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa B 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes people let the dislike for the ex-spouse/bf/gf get in the way of loving the child. If possible, put the feelings of the child ahead of personal dislikes and grudges against others.
Pampered children whether step or not make situations difficult by causing the opposing parent to be on guard or ill at ease.
Of course, as a parent, there is just nothing like your own child, especially as a mom.
Am a step-grandparent. The child is sweet and adorable. It is the manipulative father, who is unrelated and gives our daughter-in-law a hard time, that I dislike. I really don't like seeing a child put in the middle and blackmailed emotionally.
2007-04-30 09:20:48 · answer #2 · answered by kriend 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes. The bond is not the same. You didn't carry that one in your body for 9 months. You may love your step child, but it will never be the same. That being said, you should try to never let the step child know that. I will say that my oldest brother, who is my half-brother, was always treated just like my dad's own son. My dad says there is no difference in any of his kids, step or not.
2007-04-30 09:10:51 · answer #3 · answered by Lotus 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is normal because it is not your child that you have nurtured since birth. It will never be the same as a bio child, but that does not mean it has to be any less. It will just be different as your love for your spouse is different than a bio child. You can certainly acheive it though, but it takes work like any other relationship. You do not start out as in love with your bio child either. That takes time to develop as well. KWIM
I am a bonus-mom to a beautiful little girl. I have two bio-daughters with my husband as well. My love for her is different, but it is wonderful. I don't use the term step because our relationship is so much more. She is a bonus-daughter to me.
2007-04-30 11:19:40 · answer #4 · answered by Sheri H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes...I love my step son..I care about him and want only the best for him...same as my two sons, but I dont LOVE him the same as I do my own children...and I do feel bad about it..but its normal..he is 10 years old and I barely know him as he lives on the East coast and I live in the midwest...so Im sure with time and getting to know him I will grow to love him more as my own...I think everything just takes time and a willingness from the step parent to let that child into their heart and finally accept and love them completely as their own...
2007-04-30 09:14:04 · answer #5 · answered by JLee 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of what some think, I do think it is normal. Even though you may be in their lives from a young age, it is difficult to love them the same as a child you gave birth to, or a child who is completely yours, such as a child you adopted. It doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you human.
I have 3 stepkids. I didn't come into their lives until the youngest was about 7-8. Only seeing them on visitation, makes it hard for me to love them the same way I love the 2 children I gave birth to. I love them because they are a part of my husband and because they are my daughters siblings, but no, I don't feel the undying, unconditional love that I feel for my own biological kids. I doubt that my husband feels that same love for my son, his stepson.
2007-04-30 13:51:18 · answer #6 · answered by LittleMermaid 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It's good if you feel the same love for a step-child as you do your own. Then your step-child doesn't feel left out and like you have to force yourself to look at them. Your own child may be jelous but they will get over it.
2007-04-30 09:16:16 · answer #7 · answered by jarnvila88 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It is, it doesn't mean your a bad person. Some people like their step child but may not love them. Love is something that grows, so don't feel ba about it.
2007-04-30 09:10:33 · answer #8 · answered by Annie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes and this is comeing from a step-parent. I care about my step daughter alot but I do not have the love for her I have for my own two biological children. Infact I do not love my nephews and niece who I rasied how I feel about my own children.
2007-04-30 09:29:30 · answer #9 · answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
YES! Of course, that is great! That is how you should feel. You shouldn't make a difference between children; step, natural, adopted, etc. They are children and should be loved equally. Good for you! God Bless!
2007-04-30 09:12:29 · answer #10 · answered by Czech Chick 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋