my neighbor for unknown reasons tells to all the neighborough terrible things about me.I really do not know why I've been very courteous with her all the time.I try to not make a big deal but her gossips are very insulting and degrading with absolut no sense.
Everybody agree that she is not a total normal person but also everybody (me included) is afraid of her and/or her family who are all most part of the time in and out of jail for various violent crimes.
I can not move so,that wont be the answer
can someone just trashed another one like that legally?
2007-04-30 08:01:20 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
the bible says, love thine enemies. So kill her with kindness. kind words turn away wrath. Don't put yourself in harms way but find your self being nice to her when confronted. It takes guts but know the truth about yourself, and don't be moved by her lies or her beliefs. If you have children or are married, they are the main priorities and the only personal opinions that count concerning you. So don't worry. I know it hurts to be lied on. But you can't put out a fire by adding fuel to it. Neutralize it.
2007-04-30 08:23:20 · answer #1 · answered by beautyzhername 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You really cannot stop anyone from gossiping. When I have had ridiculous tales repeated to me I always say something along the lines of "I look at gossip as a childish game and will refuse to believe any of it unless the person involved has told me something."
If everyone believes that she is not "totally normal," I would just ignore the entire thing. If someone chooses to believe gossip then that speaks to their own nosiness and immaturity.
If you are being verbally trashed, there is not much you can do about it, you can report her to the police for slander, but it would most likely make things worse, as she would realize that her statements are affecting you and that would be entertaining to her.
It takes a much more mature person to just ignore the whole thing. If she and her family are the type of people to be in and out of jail; she is using this gossip to make herself feel better; but nobody is going to take her word for anything.
Hold your head high, treat her as well as is possible, and know that you are the better person.
2007-04-30 08:15:16 · answer #2 · answered by Sue F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is what worked for me when a coworker was gossiping about me..... I gave a friendly hello, as usual. I complimented her clothes to keep the friendly tone. I mentioned what a good worker she is. Basicly, I killed her with kindness. The gossiping weaned off. She became a nicer person. Maybe she was going through something that made her like that, though it doesn't justify her meliciousness. I didn't confront her since she had already punished herself..... She made herself look bad with all the mean things she said. I will never trust her. We will never be close. But at least I don't worry that she'll stab me in the back. We are civil, though she's acting like my best friend. I don't know if this would work for you, because your neighbor sounds like a trickier situation. Good luck.
2007-04-30 08:22:30 · answer #3 · answered by phantom 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have 2 options:
1. Politely inform her that you've heard that she's been saying inappropriate things about you & that on the off chance that that itself was gossip, you'd like to ask her if it in fact is true, that she has said these things. Never name names & just say you heard it from a mutual friend. If she denies, she at least knows you know & hopefully, the gossip will subside. If she admits to it, ask her why & ignore her from then on. If she apologizes, be nothing but a neighbor.
2. Ignore it all. After all, the best revenge is happiness.
2007-04-30 08:11:00 · answer #4 · answered by judy bo-booty 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have little control over your neighbor's behavior. But you can refuse to listen. When the gossip is coming, just change the subject or excuse yourself from the conversation.
2007-04-30 12:50:21 · answer #5 · answered by drshorty 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't. It sounds to me like a simple case of the green eyed monster on your neighbor's behalf.
Simply ignore her and don't allow her bitterness to ruin your relationship with your neighbors. People are smart. We can usually see through the gossip.
2007-04-30 08:05:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If everybody knows she's just talking nonsense then don't let it rattle you. The woman wants attention. If the gossip starts to affect your ability to work (ie you get fired or can't get hired) because of what she says you can sue for slander, but until that point you just have to ignore it.
Sorry.
2007-04-30 08:14:20 · answer #7 · answered by LX V 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go up to your neighbor and ask them why they are talking bad about you? And also tell them you know that they are.Usually a face to face confrontation will shut them up
2007-04-30 08:06:10 · answer #8 · answered by shorty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
next you and your "neighbors" are together, confront the one spreading the lies in front of the others. Ask then about their lies. Confronting them in front of the ones they are lying to, is the best way to stop it.
2007-04-30 08:08:15 · answer #9 · answered by spiritwalker 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋