A girl named Mary is sleeping through Sunday School as usual. Then the teacher asked her a question "Who created the universe?". A kid in back of her poked her with a pencil in the butt and she screamed "Oh my god!" The teacher says "that's correct Mary." At first she doesn't know what is going on but she decides to forget about it and falls back to sleep. An hour later the teacher asked her another question "Mary who is our Lord and Savior?" The boy pokes her again and she screams "Jesus Christ!" The teacher says "thats correct Mary" and she falls asleep. Another hour goes by and the teacher asked her another question. "What did Eve say to Adam after they had there twenty third child?" The boy pokes her and she screams "You stick that thing in me one more time I will get it and break it in half!!!" The teacher faints.
2007-04-30 07:11:27 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Brilliant.. Yet another ray of sunshine in an otherwise dull evening..
2007-04-30 07:16:15 · answer #1 · answered by Wildman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The kid in the back was "little Johnny." There are a million little Johnny jokes on the web. They've been a staple of humor for a century.
Little Johnny desperately wanted a bright red wagon for Christmas. His friends were writing letters to Santa Claus, so Johnny decided to do them one better.
"Dear Jesus," he wrote, "If I get a red wagon for Christmas, I will not fight with my brother Hank for a year." Then Johnny thought, 'Oh, no, Hank is such a brat, I could never, ever keep that promise.' So Johnny threw away the letter and wrote another one.
"Dear Jesus, if I get a red wagon for Christmas, I will eat all my vegetables for a year." Then Johnny thought, 'Oh, no, that means spinach and asparagus. Yuck! I could never ever keep that promise.'
Then Johnny had an idea. He threw away the paper and went downstairs to the living room. From the mantel above the fireplace, he grabbed the family's statue of the Virgin Mary. Taking the statue to the kitchen he wrapped it in newspapers then stuffed the newspapers into a grocery bag. He took the package upstairs to his room, opened the closet and placed the whole works in the farthest, darkest corner. Then he closed the closet door tightly, took a new sheet of paper and wrote: "Dear Jesus. If you ever want to see your mother again..."
2007-04-30 07:20:35 · answer #2 · answered by Rico Toasterman JPA 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Oh Yeah? This is the funniest one I know:
A man is going on a business trip to New Orleans and has to take his wife. So
they catch the plane there. And as soon as they arrive the man gets called back,
and to be nice to his wife he tells her to stay and enjoy her vacation. So the
day before the man is scheduled to leave him starts thinking what if she cheats
on me out of boredom, so he decides to go to the sex shop and bye her toy. When
he arrives he asks the manager if he has anything really special. So the manager
tells him that he does have a really old dildo with magical powers, and the man
replies yeah right. So the manager says voodoo dick the door and the dildo gets
up and flies at the door and starts pecking at it, then the manager says voodoo
dick box and the dildo flies back into its box. The man instantly replies I’ll
take it, but the manager replies it is not for sale, but u can rent it. So the
man takes it to his wife and tells her the story, but she doesn't believe him
either, so the man replies voodoo dick the water melon. The dildo goes flying
into the water melon. The wife is so happy about her present she makes
passionate love to her husband. The next day the husband leaves. After a few
days the wife starts getting board and decides to use her present. So she says
voodoo dick my *****, so the dildo does what it is told and goes into her
vagina. After a while the woman realizes she doesn't know how to turn it off. So
she gets in her car and heads for the hospital, on the way she is having so many
orgasms that she is swerving all over the road. after a while she gets pulled
over by a cop, and the cop says why are u driving like a maniac, and the woman
replies well there is this voodoo dick, and it is giving me orgasms, and all of
a sudden the cop shouts VOODO DICK MY @$$!!!
2007-04-30 07:47:09 · answer #3 · answered by Chris R 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
They sure need to cut down on the length of those classes. Can you imagine three hours already? No wonder the boy is getting bored and poking pencils all over poor Mary.
Good one.
2007-04-30 08:38:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anthony F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the ultimate thank you to get him to end bugging you is to make him experience much greater awkward. purely be like i comprehend you're in love with me or i comprehend you have a large weigh down on me, however the poking rather desires to end. this is not any longer taking pictures my interest haha. purely say issues that could make him rather awkward and he will end.
2016-10-04 03:36:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hilarious!
2007-04-30 07:46:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Again your funny. 10/10 and a star.
2007-04-30 08:03:36 · answer #7 · answered by Gsplan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol loved id made me chuckle loads and still laughing lol
10/10 star defiantly lol
2007-04-30 10:17:02 · answer #8 · answered by bubblez 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i've heard similar adam n eve jokes,but this is the funniest!star!
2007-04-30 07:28:40 · answer #9 · answered by gutter_flower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahahahahahaha this is absolutellyy friggin amazinli funnyy hahahahaha lmaoooooooooooooo
gud one! am givin u a star!!!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxox
2007-04-30 07:24:01 · answer #10 · answered by x.T.x 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋