Saving Up for a Wedding?

Question

My boyfriend and I are thinking about setting our wedding date in 2009. We want to wait a while and save up some money. We both have large families and therefore our wedding will be quite costly. We are budgeting around $20,000-$25.000.

My bf parent's have offered to help pay for part of the wedding costs, as they did with his brother. I'm assuming they expect my parent's to also contribute equally, as well as my FI and I. We have figured in will be about $8,500 dollars each.

However, my parent don't really have any money. They will only be able to contribute about $2500. I'm fine with this. However, my parents do not want my in-laws thinking they are skimping on the costs. They do not want talk about their money issues w/ my in-laws, which is understandable. I told my mom not to worry and I would make up the $6,000 on my own; as well as my Fi and I $8500. What is the best way to save up for $15,000 over the next 2 years?

Please do not tell me to have a smaller wedding. Like I said, Fi and I have large families and we can not cut the guest list. We are happy with are budget, as it considered below average for our part of the country. This budget will get us a classy, yet modest wedding.

So, please...just money saving tips. I don't need the lecture on how a wedding is one day and a marriage is a lifetime. I know that.

Answer 1

My fiance and I figured out that he spends an average of $25-30 a weekday for JUST HIM to eat. I spend $10-20. We easily spend $100 on a weekend to eat. That's around $1000 a month! We bought bread, frozen dinners, fresh fruit & vegetables, etc and have sandwiches or a frozen meal for at least 1 (if not 2) meals a day. I've already been able to save $1400 in 2 1/2 months. It can be done, it just takes discipline (a lot in our case, since we both LOVE to eat!)

Answer 2

No matter what you budget, it is always going to end up costing just a little bit more.

You don't have to have a smaller wedding and invite fewer people, but you can save money. I saved a LOT of money by using in season flowers instead of something exotic. Also check the place where you are having your wedding at. Sometimes they own a variety of things that you can use like strings of lights, that will save some money as well. I saved hundreds of dollars buying my wedding dress at a consignment shop versus a bridal store. I was only going to wear it once anyways and got a gorgeous gown that I would have never been able to afford and it was way better quality than the price range i was able to swing.. (or why pay hundreds, right?)

Also, find a good seamstress if you need a dress slightly shortened or borught in whether you buy new or on consignment. The bridal shop if you buy new - they make their money on ordering a dress a size too big and then you paying through the nose on alterations.

There usually is not a set rule about parents paying wedding costs. Traditionally, the grooms parents pay for the rehearsal dinner and the liquor. But nothing is set in stone.

I would actually hold off on finalizing a guest list until the date gets closer. I know that you don't want a smaller wedding because you have big families, but decide where you cut the list off. Do you have to invite all of your coworkers? Certainly invite aunts and uncles, first cousins, grandparents, etc, but if the cousins are all grown up with children of their own - do you invite the children or not. And what about your parent's cousins? They would definitely understand if you had to cut the guest list off somewhere even if your parent's kept in touch with them. Are they legitimately close to the bride and groom or not?

You want to not make it look like a gift grab, but a situation where you are inviting people you are close to that you want to share in your special day .

Answer 3

Never ASSUME anyone will be giving you money to help with the wedding, untill they actually tell you they will be contributing, and the amount. That is asking for trouble.

The parents do not have to "match" each other's amounts, in any way! It is not the other parents' business! I don't know why your family thinks that. It is not a fee to be paid-- it is a gift to be freely given, according to their own ability!

Large weddings do not HAVE to be that costly. There are plenty of ways to make them much less so. I am planning a large wedding for less than $5000, including rings and honeymoon. You are making certain assumptions that are not necessarily so.

It's good and responsible of you that you want to start saving up, but honestly that is a HUGE amount of money for two young people to be saving up, in less than two years. You are planning to save up $15,000, starting at zero?--- what percentage of your combined salaries is that? Also, what about a place to live? Are you saving up for a house down payment in the near future as well? are you also paying off school loans? These other issues are also important to consider!

Suze Orman has written some great books about managing money, and another great one is by Mary Hunt and is called The Complete Cheapskate. You might also look into the variety of simple living websites (voluntary simplicity) that are out there now, for tips on money issues.

Answer 4

One idea to save money on your wedding is to have it at a park or historical site. These are usually cheaper than most places.

Until then, use coupons for your groceries and begin setting aside a little bit of money each month. If you get married in summer of 2009, you need to put away about $600 a month. Also, try not to eat out as much, that can end up saving you a lot of money. Try to cut down on some of the more expensive things you usually do. Remember, it is just until you have enough money saved up. Good luck, and may you have a wonderful life together! :)

Answer 5

No more dates, no more dinners, movies, no more new clothes, no more expensive perfumes, no more Starbucks every morning, no more new shoes.

Say you make $2000 a month, you need to save 13% of your check or about $250 every month to save up the $6,000 for your parents and probably another $178 for your half of the $8,500 for your and your fiancee's half. That's $436 a month, well if you round it out to an even $450 a month you should be set. Consider it a payment and just automatically put it away every month when you get your check.

So if you have a Starbuck coffee every morning and a scone, you're spending about $5 every morning, so by not spending on that you will save $150 a month, which will turn into $1,800 in one year and finally $3,600 by your wedding day which will put you at only $650 short of your half of the $8500 you an your fiance are supposed to pitch in.

Answer 6

When my husband and I first got engaged in December of 97, we started saving for our house. Our wedding date was set for September 19, 1998 and we wanted to be able to purchase our first house and move in after the wedding. Well we saved $6500 from January until August by putting everything we could in our savings account. We also made the account two signatures required to withdrawal money, so we wouldn't be tempted to buy stuff with our money. He only made $400 a week then and I only brought home $600 twice a month, so if we can do that you can do it too. Just be determined, sit down and write out your income and expenses then determine the amount you have left over. If you see any expenses you can cut out, like if you eat out alot, then cut back on that, or if you take your clothes to the dry cleaners, try to find a cheaper one or use coupons....etc. Good Luck and Congratulations!! BTW, my Mom and Dad started saving for our wedding the day we got engaged, and we had a beautiful wedding. They paid for it all and his Dad gave us $1,000. Of course my wedding didn't cost anywhere near $20,000, but money can be saved, especially since you have two years.

Answer 7

My niece found her wedding dress on e-bay. It was exactly what she wanted and only paid $130 for it. Alterations were only $50 and the shoes were $20. It was also brand new never worn. That may help you save quite a bit there. Start checking discount stores for gowns and other clothing needed for the wedding. It will help with the budget. Find caterer that will let you sample the menu that way you won't have any surprises at the reception. Do you know any florists or people who have a knack for arranging flowers? they may five you a discount. Same with bakers. We knew someone who did cakes on the side and got a very good deal on it. She also let you try different kinds to see if you liked it. Yard sales, e-bay, part-time job just for wedding money can help also. Good Luck and Congratulations.

Answer 8

Make a budget and stick to it. Shop around before making any decisions and make sure you get the best price. Bargain when you can. Take money out of each paycheck and put it in a separate checking account and DO NOT TOUCH IT until you are ready to start buying things for the wedding. For Xmas or birthdays ask for a contribution towards the wedding fund. Good luck and Congratulations, I hope everything works well for you.

Answer 9

You are very lucky that your parents (both sets) are able to help at all with wedding expenses, and are eager to help you save for the day of your dreams.

My parents gave me a check for a fixed amount, and said 'this is yours to use however you like.' It didn't cover the wedding expenses, but I knew I didn't have to worry about a parent blowing a gasket as costs accumulated.

Rather than say 'my parents put in $2,500, his put in $10,000' you may simply express that 'both sets of parents are helping with wedding expenses' if that makes your parents feel better about contributing what they feel is appropriate. You are 'all' hosting the wedding.

SAVING MONEY
- Make your own bows and church decorations, even the unity candle can be a simple one embelished with lace or ribbon.
- Use less-exotic flowers at the reception - or use candles and mirrors with smaller arrangements.
- Ask your reception hall what decorations they 'have' (many have mirrors, candle holders, candy dishes, etc. that you can use free or nearly-free.) Ask what items (candy, nuts) you may provide instead of paying them to dump them in a dish.
- Skip the party-favor gifts to guests (many get left on the tables)
- Consider clothing for attendants that isn't custom -- nobody cares whether your shoes are died-to-match, as long as they match each others. Separate top/bottoms allow the individuals to actually buy an outfit they could wear again.
- Consider a beauty college for hair/nails, at least for the attendants. The students did a birthday party for my daughter and her friends for next-to-nothing.
- Cut down the size of the cake. They are usually priced per-serving, and I've never, ever, seen the whole cake get eaten.
- Consider hot appetizers instead of a sit-down or buffet meal. Everyone 'grazes' and a lot less gets wasted and thrown away. Lunch, of course, is also less expensive, as is a simple cake-and-punch church reception.
- Borrow the gown, veil, gloves (or at least the fancy slip) from a friend or family member -- they would be HONORED to have you wear them.

Answer 10

If you save $625 per month for the two years you will have the $15000. You each could save $313 per month and put it in a joint savings account. If you can't do that at once split it up between 2 paychecks and it comes out to $157. (I rounded up to the nearest dollar both times). If you are having a hard time figuring out where that money will come from try not eating out as much, switch vehicle insurance companies to save money, take that extra money and save it. If your work offers a credit union option, have that money taken directly out of your paycheck and after a while you will never miss it. If you want save more so that you have extra just in case (honeymoon). Best wishes!!!