Reporter to Winston Churchill: "You are drunk"
Winston Churchill to reporter: "Yes Madame I am, and you are ugly, but in the morning I will be sober!"
2007-04-29 21:31:41 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
"the only thing that goes with the flow is a dead fish"
2007-04-29 22:32:07 · answer #1 · answered by rossy g 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
Sir Winston Churchill
2007-04-29 22:13:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heh heh, I do love Churchill.
There was a quote that was attributed to him, but is mark twain I'm led to believe : "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."
and I quite like :
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
2007-04-29 21:45:42 · answer #3 · answered by Sarah T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WSC was a great man.... I heard once that the first Prime Minister of Canada, John A. MacDonald, who was a Conservative, and also had a drinking problem, was making a speech to some voters, when he had to turn away and vomit from the fact that he had too much to drink the night before. Without missing a beat, he turned back to the crowd and said:"... and THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is what I think of the Liberals!".... but my fav quote is Bobby DeNiro to Charles Grodin in 'Midnight Run': "I got two words to say to you - Shut the fvck up!"
2007-04-29 21:42:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This quote was said in the chamber of the house of commons. Lady Astor (the first elected woman MP) said "Sir I think you're drunk", and he replied with the rest.
There were regular vocal jousts together. She once said "Sir if you were my husband I'd give you poison."
He replied "Madam if I was your husband I'd gladly take it."
I like Margaret Thatcher's use of the English Language. When interviewed on the steps of 10 Downing Street about a new addition to the family she said.
" We are a grandmother."
2007-04-29 22:21:47 · answer #5 · answered by GenetteS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm there for the hundred-crunches-worth of abdominal laughter on yours, but c'mon, she couldn't help it.
In my favorite quote, WE were/are the victim, so the abrasion isn't as acidic:
And it is, "I LOVED education, which is why I spent as little time in school as possible." ~Albert Einstein
2007-04-29 21:50:39 · answer #6 · answered by rockman 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ma lady if i where to offer you one million pounds to have sex with me would you accept
why yes of course i would
and if i offered you 1 pound would you?
do you think im some sort of whore
well we have allready established that, now we are bartering over the price
2007-04-29 21:36:44 · answer #7 · answered by teenagekick5 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Depends on your view of funny, but try:
"If a man is a problem, get rid of him. No man, no problem"
Joseph Stalin
2007-04-29 22:07:15 · answer #8 · answered by the_burrij 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Jambo, Thank You that is very funny!!! He was great indeed. LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL... AND IT WON'T STOP. Thank You for the laugh and big smile on my face. Have a good morning.
LOL.
A Friend.
Clowmy
2007-04-29 21:37:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
"They say marriage is made in heaven, but so do thunder and lightning."
"If you know you are going to fail, then fail gloriously"
2007-04-29 22:01:48 · answer #10 · answered by Cherry Shortcake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋