I'm 27 and I have been with my boyfriend for two years. He is the best thing that has ever happen to be. He is wonderful, sweet and caring. But I'm confused right now and not sure what I want. He has been telling me how hard work has been at work lately. He is a nurse. As a human rights worker I have always been empathetic to suffering of any kind, my friends, internationally etc... but because my emotions have changed towards him, so has my capacity to show empathy towards his life. Its not like me. Even if my love for him has changed, by respect for him has not, so why then, do I feel restless and un interested when he talks about his stress? why can't I feel empathy towards his situation at work?. I just don't seem to care. I feel awful! just looking for insight.
2007-04-28 17:19:22 · 4 answers · asked by Jai247 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It may be because you don't want to relate to him in a way that you relate to your clients. Do you do counseling? Help people with their stress? Perhaps he's come to lean on that aspect of your skill a little too much.
2007-04-28 17:23:03 · answer #1 · answered by Singinganddancing 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my own opinon, I believe that in the job that you that requires you to have so much emotion that when you come home you all you feel like doing is nothing and what I mean by nothing is that you are probably drained from all the tedious work and somehow by you having so much emotion drained out of you, you are pretty much tired out. I don't believe it is him, but more of you and maybe you should start worrying about what is right for just you right now and if this still happens then I am not sure.
2007-04-28 17:27:10 · answer #2 · answered by Brad S 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi. It's wonderful when people are warm, and like to nurture others, but in a relationship, it's even better when people are similar in mindset, but "specialize" (ex. you are the human rights worker, and he is the activist, for instance, or vice versa.) He is a nurse; you have your own nurturing you deal with daily. I doubt it would be easy to "double up" on your days like this, giving and listening, without being listened to, perhaps. You need to get your proverbial "cup" filled as well...Good luck.
2007-04-28 17:27:57 · answer #3 · answered by Artemisia G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he does it every day I can't say I blame you. You want to be there for the one you care about, but not if they whine or complain day after day, it becomes boring to listen to. Have your feelings toward him changed other than listening to him about his stress at work? Give it some time to see if it changes, don't make any hasty decisions while you are confused.
2007-04-28 17:24:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋