Why do white men care what society thinks?

Question

I am a therapist and I have a lot of white male clients. they often tell me that they are not happy in their relationships, which happens to be with a white woman. They tell me that they love black women; the shape of their bodies, their golden brown complexion the softness of their skin and the way they dress and smile, and would love to be in a relationship with them, but are afraid of what their friends or family may say. Why do they care?

Answer 1

Unfortunately in today's society there is still a lingering stigma of interracial coupling. Even though we have made strides in social equality, there is still mixed opinions concerning white and black couples, which causes a fear that their relationship will caused them to be judged and shunned. They really shouldn't care, and think to their own happiness and not what society thinks. It is the courage of these people (the people who don't consider what society thinks) that break down social paradigms and shifts the views on race and equality.

Answer 2

perhaps it is the environment and upbringing that they came from. There is still a large number of people in society that are judgmental about mixed race couples even thought there is a growing number or inter racial couples. We are not that far removed from segregation its self. I graduated High school in 1989 and I can remember that my school did not have a home coming king or queen for fear of an inter racial couple, I can also remember as a freshman two seniors 1 white 1 black that did not go to the prom together because of that and went with friends and met up inside. Crazy as it sounds
And unfortunately our friends and family still have an influence on us albeit postive and or negative

Answer 3

I've heard of this before.....(all of the above) in my honest opinion--I think that this is true--some black women are very attractive and have nice bodies who wouldn't desire to be in a relationship of some sort with a black women...white men they should just go for what they know and go after what they truly want!!!!

Answer 4

Because since the begining of slavery they (white men) have been told that black women (people) are below them and are the lowest of low in human beings. They see black women as forbidden fruit and are probably bored with what they are used to. I think the whole race thing is stupid. I have never dated inside my race and not because I did it on purpose but because what attracts me to a man is more then just skin color or ethnicity. People are going to judge but as long as its you and that person and you both are happy, why should you care what anybody else thinks?

Answer 5

When you meet these men please give them my email. I'm a black woman and I swear it is hard to meet white men. I have never allowed skin tone to get in the way of who attracts me. I actually love white men. The problem is I get little love back. The black men love me. I know that white men have to at least look at me and think good things. But all the same, very few approach me. Maybe you can give me some advice on how to get their attention without getting their attention. You know???

Answer 6

I am white. My lady is black. It was never a question of race or what the rest of society thinks. We became friends. We became lovers. I'm not in the least concerned about what society thinks. It's their problem, not mine.

If you really are a therapist then you should know. Those that you talk to are the ones that are in NEED of your service. There are many of us out there that DON'T need you.

Answer 7

I don't know where you're from; it might be a geographic thing.

Although I haven't seen a lot of white men with black women. I have seen a lot of black men with white women though. I am sure part of the reason is a certain myth, which there is no positive analog for white men.

-RNG

Answer 8

i believe it lies interior explanation why a Black guy dates a White lady. each so often its basically that he's raised in a predominately white community so he cant help it. yet many Black men downtalk black women human beings and basically actively pursue white women human beings because of the fact he sees her as extra perfect. (for despite motives). Black women people who date white men might date him because of the fact of no success with black men. Black men intimidated by using her fulfillment or she is basically surrounded by using them at artwork. no longer asserting black women human beings dont downtalk black men yet a white guy is oftentimes the 2d %.. Plus the share or bw wm is alot much less the bm ww.

Answer 9

I would be skeptical as to why white men are saying these types of things to their black female therapist in the first place.

What brings them into therapy that leads them to coincidentally profess their desires for black women to a therapist who happens to be a black woman?

I don't think this has as much to do with men's impressions of societal judgment as much as it might have to do with their cultural/racial/transference issues interfering with the therapeutic relationship.

I would bet my bottom dollar that they are saying these things not because they want your help in being able to date a black woman, but rather to assure you that they are not racist.

Answer 10

Why does anyone care about what society thinks? I wouldn't just single out white men.