Do my parents have the right to force me into a religion, and force me to go to church?

Question

I'm a good kid; i don't do drugs, i've done nothing wrong. But my mum is forcing me to go to church, and i've told her i don't believe in a God---not at my age, at least. (I'm fifteen)
Does she have the right to do this?
She says it will help with my severe depression...but church is part of the reason. I've had some very bad experiences at churches.

Answer 1

When I was 18 years old I was extremely depressed. I felt I had ruined my whole life.
Then I had a personal encounter with Jesus Christ.
I have never been depressed since. That was over 36 years ago.
Read my friend's story:
http://dianedew.com/index.shtml

Answer 2

Severe depression need to be dealt with first. You might be experiencing anti-social behavior (in the form of wanting to hide rather than go out into public where you feel alone in a crowd). Your need to have a councelor and probably start some form of mild anti-depressant.

Yes, she can force you to go to church until you reach 18, but if you have a councelor they may be able to act as a buffer between you and your Mom and help you say that there is something about church that is really bothering you.

If your Mom won't or can't afford to take you for counceling then you can ask you guidence councilors at school if the could help you find a mental health facility that will work within your budget. Please do this, because a mind is a terrible thing to loose.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Unless you want to give the social services system a try (which I don't recommend after the rape, abuse and neglect my cousins went through in the system) you might try making the best of what your mother wants until you are 18 and can legally make your own decisions. That's only three years. You can make it.

There are some rotten people in churches, there are also some wonderful people. You've missed the whole point of church which is that God loved you so much despite your anger at your parents, your depression, your attempts to manipulate people, that he DIED for you. Let himself be beaten, mocked, spit upon and tortured because he wanted to be able to talk to YOU. That's the sort of God I believe , and the one I hope you find someday. Until then . . . .

The teen years are hard and it's easy to get down, and further down, and further down until you can't think clearly any more.

Exercise and doing nice things for other people will help with your depression, I promise. It might not cure it, but sweating hard for thirty minutes a day will do more to re-balance your brain chemistry than about anything else. Add the benefits of helping someone else (wash an elderly person's windows, spend an afternoon serving at a soup kitchen or down at the community center for the handicapped, or at a therapeutic riding center, or reading to elementary students will do incredible things for the way you feel.

Trust me. It helps me every day.

Answer 4

Yes she has the right to force you and I think she should. The Bible says
Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
If you have had problems discuss this with your mother and ask if you can choose your own church. Every church is different. Maybe if your Mother has the final say in which church(choose several that you like and let her pick) she will be okay with that. The important part is communicate with your mom what the problems are and find out what she wants you to get from the church.
Hope this helps.

Answer 5

If she is a christian it's more than a right it's a responciblity in her eyes. Parents are supposed to give thier children their level best. Now here's my advice. If this particular church more like the people who go to that church have hurt you and continue to, you should discuss it with your mother. This may not be a good church. Just because there are bad apples doesn't mean there are other good things about that congregation. Further just because this may be a bad church doesn't mean that all churches will be the same. If you have depression one thing that will cause is avoidance of anything that could potentially hurt... even if that thing will actually help. Withdrawl from healthy relationships for example.
Sit down with you mom and your counselor tell them the things that happened that hurt you. So you can objectively with thier help decide if this is something that means you and your mom should seek out a different church or just stay away from certain people.

Your mom is just trying despirately to bring you to where she thinks you can get the best help for your situation. She's not trying to hurt you... and if you tell her what hurt you in the past she can help you and protect you from it in the future.
I pray that you will have this depression lifted and get the emotional healing you need. That you and your mom will be able to talk about this and can find a mutually benificial and spiritually edifying solution. I pray that you will be able to see God for who he is despite anything people in church have said and done to you. And I ask your forgiveness as a christian for any harm anyone who claimed to be christian did to harm you.
God bless you richly,

Answer 6

I personally don't think it's right. Legally, however, there is nothing stopping them from taking you to church as long as you're a minor and a dependent.

I've been in your shoes (I'm an Atheist), so I recommend taking this negative and making something positive out of it.

By that I mean that you should try to make friends with other kids in church who around the same age as yourself. You worry that you won't have anything in common with them because you don't believe in God, but religious or not, chances are they don't want to be there either.

Answer 7

Try sitting down and talking this through with your parents. Explain your reasons for not wanting to go to church. It's important that you stay calm when you discuss this. You need to show them that you are mature enough to make your own decision on this. Explain to them that church is contributing to your depression and explain why. If you feel comfortable with the idea, try counselling for your depression as an alternative to church. On a personal note, I'd stay clear of the antidepressants if you can. Good luck.

Answer 8

I'm sorry - I went through the same thing as a teenager.
My parents forced my to go to church at least three times a week - I hated it. But I DO believe in God.

Church will not help you with your depression- only God can do that. And sometimes people confuse church with God.

A church is a group of people who come together for the purpose of worship and learning. (that's what it's supposed to be anyway)

God on the other hand is oftentimes not truly found in church - God is found within yourself.

Sorry, but unfortunatly, your parents CAN make you go to church - because you still live in their house and you're not of adult age ...yet.

just remember - no one can MAKE you believe anything-
except God.

Answer 9

I really hate to say this but yes they do. Until you are a legal adult your parents have the full legal right to make you do whatever they wish, like sticking to curfews or going to church. But even with the law in the way you can still seek ways around it. Have you tried telling your mom how you feel, and told her that church is part of the reason for your depression? Also has your mother seeked other ways to treat you for your depression, like counseling? You might want to suggest to your mother that she may want to help you seek a psychologist instead. And also remind her that while she has the legal right to make you attend church she also has a legal responsibility to ensure that you get good medical care, both physical and mental/emotional and that if she refuses to let you go to counseling she can be held up on charges of neglect.

If talking to her won't do any good, try someone else. Try a relative. Try a school counselor. Try a favorite teacher, or the parent of a friend of yours. Having struggled with depression with myself as a teenager I know how horrid it can be, and I know how hard it is to try to deal with it on your own. Please go seek other ways of getting help if your mom won't do it.

Good luck and may the Gods be with you.

Answer 10

Being a minor you have to follow your parents instruction and attend church if they want you to go.

As far as not believing it, that no one can force you to do.

But why not stop focusing on the negative or religious aspect of it? Look at church as a place where you can meet other good kids, enjoy various activities with them, expand your social circle..
You don't have to be all for everything the church stands for but if you can see that the church has something to offer you will make your attending and experience there alot more fun than if you totally tune it out.

Answer 11

Yes, they are your parents. If you have had bad experiences with churches, try changing your perspective. If you're expecting them to do things to make you feel good for being there, you're missing the point. Church isn't about you or any of the other worshipers there; it's about God. Get your focus on Him and off yourself. Once you've had some practice at it, you'll find it a refreshing change not thinking of yourself all the time.

If you are depressed, you need to get outside yourself and think more of others. Depression is often -- not always, mind you, but often -- caused by acute selfishness: how do I feel, how do things affect me, what do I think, how am I doing, who's helping me, why do things happen to me, and so forth. I, I, me, me, me. You'll never be happy when your focus is on yourself and whether you're happy. That's just not how the world works. The media try to sell us on the idea that we need to be concerned with our own happiness above all else, primarily so we'll buy whatever they're selling to make us happy. It doesn't work, not in the long run. Those who are happiest are those who live for others.