Issue with my parents and child?

Question

Guys I was a young parent, and my parents told me they would help out with my child, now he's 3 years old. Well now they are going back on their word.. they throw a fit when I have to go to college class, or babysit to get money, and don't seem to help. They tell me I have to have an eye on him every second, but sometimes I can't. My mom turned around and contradicted herself by saying how she couldn't even keep an eye on me while I was a kid. Geez. They are getting onto me about having to do school assignments during the day, but yet she told me to do them at night. So if I do them at night, I go to bed late, and get up late and they are complaining I'm sleeping in?

What should I do? Im not in a situation where I can move on my own yet..

Answer 1

Your parents are obviously feeling like they are having to raise YOUR child even though they have already done thier "duty" by raising YOU! They seem to feel like they are being taken advantage of and are trying the "tough love" thing. It may be hard but you HAVE to realize that he is YOUR child and as hard as it may be YOU have to ultimately take responsibility for him!! They are willing to HELP but not to raise the child FOR you!! I understand that you are trying to get through school so that you can make a better life for both you and your child... but YOU got yourself into this situation and its really NOT your parents responsibility to get you OUT of it!! You need to sit down and figure out some way to do it ALL. Its going to be hard and your life is going to consist of nothing but school and your son but that is the life that you have CHOSEN and there is nothing that you can do to get OUT of it!! Maybe think about cutting back on your classes at school so that you can spend more time taking care of your son. It might mean that it will take you twice as long to get through school... but like I said, its what you HAVE to do.. it just ISNT thier responsibility!

You may feel like they are going back on their word but it sounds like they are just burnt out and feeling used. Maybe look into finding a "mommys day out" program that your son can go to twice a week (they shouldnt cost TOO much.. my kids go on Tues and Thurs from 9-2 and it only cost $16 per day). And on THOSE days do as much schoolwork as you can and help you parents around the house as much as you can too... Pull your own weight!! Also check into a pre-school program. I dont know how long before your child turns 4 but when he does there are a LOT of programs out there they they can start going to that are FREE preschool programs (government funded) and he will then be gone from the house for a regular school day Mon-Fri and that will help EVERYONE b/c you will have more time for school work and your parents wont feel like they are "live in" babysitters. Like I said, you may just have to cut back on YOUR schooling until your child is old enough to attend school!! Its not THAT long before he will be so just sit tight!!

Good luck!

Answer 2

Ok, You asked for a parent's opinion. I am a mother of twin girls and a grandmother of 3 girls and 2 boys. First of all you want your parents to stop complaining about your having friends. And you think you should get paid for cleaning house. You said you are on the phone 1 hour a day with friends and 4 hours on the computer with friends. Do you think that maybe it is all the time you are spending on the computer and phone that is the real issue? When do you do your schoolwork? I bet if you showed a little more responsibility as far as helping out around the house they would ease up on you having friends. They would see that you are responsible. There are only so many hours in a day and there are things that need to get done. But I do agree that you need friends. Maybe if you could work on dividing your time up so that you can get your homework done, chores done and you would still have time for friends without the nagging from your parents. Try it and see how things work out. You may be surprised.

Answer 3

I don't know were you live but can you get subsidized childcare most governments offer this. I would contact a daycare and see if they do some will even pay for full care, especially if you are finishing school and all. Put notices up in local churches sometimes their is elderly people who might love to volunteer some time with your child. Do you have other family members to help you. You are doing the smartest thing by staying in school, talk to your school counselor maybe they have thoughts on childcare. Your parents should be proud of you not many young moms stay in school. Hang in their soon it will be summer holiday time. Good luck!!!

Answer 4

well i am going to spare you the guess you should not have had sex lecture, because i am sure you heard that enough. However regarless of anything your child, another living person that you must take care of, needs and deserves your full attention. So it will me a major struggle for you being single and young. You are going to have to give all you have and more to make it through probably the rest of your life. Do not rely on your parents, you can do it. Accept Christ as your Savior He will guide you through all your troubled times, He will never forsake you or let you down.

Answer 5

I'm so sorry for your situation. It sounds like you are working hard to improve yourself by getting a good education so you can provide a better life for your son and yourself. If your son is 3 maybe you can work with him to give you some quiet time to study. Give him hs own time with you everyday and play with him and fill him up with attention. When it is time for your quiet time to study, give him some "schoolwork" too. Lots of crayons and paper, quiet toys, etc. Teach him how to be quiet with you. Hopefully he'll settle down for sleep early and you can have the rest of the night to study. Keep everything consistant and scheduled for him. This is why it's important he has his own play time with you, first.
Next sit your parents down and tell them your plan. Remind them the sooner you get through school the sooner their nest will be just for them. Ask them for their help in reaching you goals, and for following your routine with your son. If you go to them as an adult it may make a huge difference on how they listen. Good luck, and do not give up!

Answer 6

Maybe you could sit down and discuss with them how many hours a week they would be prepared to look after your child. Then maybe get a baby sitter for the times they can't. Even though they agreed to help you they properly didn't consider that they haven't got as much energy as they once had. A three year is a bundle of energy, maybe they can't keep up with his demands as much as they could when he was younger. They may also feel you are taking advantage, you buy them a bunch of flowers and tell them how much you appreciate there help.

Answer 7

Ultimately the child is your responsibility & you can't expect your parents to do everything for you or the child. You'll have to do your school work at night and set an alarm to get up on time. Being a parent certainly makes you grow up fast, huh?

Answer 8

i am a single dad. i know it can be rough. STAY IN SCHOOL!!! recruit other family members and friends. find other parents to help you. once you tell people you are tryin to go to school people will help. your parents are probably feeling overwhelmed. after all they have already raised THEIR kid. be patient and communicate. their are day cares. do you qualify for ccms? it's gov't aid for child care. again STAY IN SCHOOL. the rewards will far out-weigh the sacrifice. hang in there. things will get easier

Answer 9

You need to have a longggg talk with your parents.

Answer 10

if you have a friend who isnt in school;ask them if they can watch your son for a while