I have recurring thought that is driving me crazy. What can I do?

Question

I have this recurring thought.. more of a feeling or a fear. I have this feeling that someone could shoot me at any second.

I felt this way before, but it only intensified when I heard about an episode of road-rage on the news where an unsuspecting man was shot in the passenger seat of an SUV while his wife was driving. He was shot by someone that was impatient because the woman was driving too slow for them. They didn't even mean to, they man didn't see it coming. And with the VA Tech shooting, it only got worse.

My father has some, well, problems. He's old and feeble, but he has problems that lead me to believe that he isn't right in the head. I have these recurring thoughts that he's laying in his bed with a gun (he has a prized gun collection which he rarely uses, he used to be an avid hunter) or that he's fly off the handle and come in my room or hurt my mom. I cringed when a speeding driver passes me, when I'm walking to my car, or when I'm not absolutely nice to someone.

I could stem from when this person, who I went to school with for many many years, saw them everyday, was killed in a really bad quadruple homocide. I told myself that "omg i'm his age, it could be me next" he was just going to his friend's neighbor's because he heard something going on. Then he got into the mess that he had nothing to do with. I mean it was just the wrong place at the wrong time. The VA tech shootings, none of those people saw it coming. I mean, it could be anyone at any second. And there's no running because one of the VA tech students was so scared that they went home afterward but was killed in a car accident. I had my first car wreck a year ago, and since then, I've gained the realization that I'm not a superhero. I can't evade everything and some things just happen and there is nothing I can do.

I think it really got bad because there was this really strange guy that came to my job and talked to me every day lately until my boss told him to never come back.

I was afraid to say that I had a boyfriend for fear he would become violent. I just have this tought that he's going to come back, against my boss's orders, pull out a gun and... I'm not all that worried about myself, but how it would affect everyone else, especially my mom. I don't know what I'd do without her. I really don't. I just don't want anything to happen to her. Like if she doesn't come home within an hour after she's off (I know she goes to the store and stuff), I go crazy. I think she's in a car accident, I can see the police officer coming to my door to tell me she's gone. I just get really anxious. I'm a perfectionist and a nervous person really. I don't know. I think I'm just goin through alot of stress right now. My boyfriend is 2000 miles away right now and it's just really really hard.

Answer 1

it's anxiety. You should ask your doctor if there's anything he can do. Maybe counselling?

Answer 2

I can't make a proper diagnosis over the net too well, but from what you're describing, you're showing symptoms of anxiety and obsessional thought.

Both sets of problems can have periods when they're more pronounced - it makes sense that the average person could imagine themselves in a bad situation if they see people or hear about someone in that situation. I'd like to ask - are you particularly empathic? It sounds like you are - empathy is often a double-edged sword since it can end up making feeling people very vulnerable to others in pain.

Your anxiety will just get worse without treatment. Thankfully your local mental health professional will be able to help you. Anxiety is pretty common but many people just suffer in silence and don't do anything about it - sometimes even seeking treatment can be a source of anxiety.

Megumi has offered the idea of obsessive compulsive disorder - with recurring and unwanted obsessional thoughts, that's the source of the compulsive behaviour. You mentioned being a perfectionist - does this mean that you keep things in order, say, in your house or at work? Do you have any rituals that almost cause you physical pain if you can't perform them? Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is often linked with anxiety and you may have elements of both which are affecting one another. However, if you don't have a balancing compulsive problem it may just be an obsessional disorder.

You may be able to ride this out, but you don't need to. With CBT and perhaps medication, things will definitely calm down for you. Speaking as the ex-boyfriend of a fair few anxious women and son of an anxious mother, not only you will feel better but so will your friends and family as a result - it's really painful to watch someone you love suffer with such a problem. Your boyfriend will really appreciate seeing you feeling safe and happy.

Answer 3

Having these thoughts is common, but does indicate that you have a concern you should discuss with a professional counselor. While, yes, the possibility does exist for those things to happen, the statistics show that the vast majority of us will never be involved in those incidents (fortunately.) When we keep thinking about this, though, it's not really about the possibility we will be involved in a shooting, but that there is an underlying concern that is bothering us.
I've had over 165 twisted ankles, so when something is bugging me, I start worrying I'm going to do it again. Likely, I will some day, maybe even soon. But I never know ahead of time when it will happen. The thought of it happening again is a message I need to look at what's bugging me at the moment. I've become very good at doing this now, and the thoughts, or obsessions as they are properly called, go away very quickly.

While you are waiting to start counseling, every time the thought comes to mind, sing your favorite song, recite your favorite poem. It helps. Also try cleansing breaths.

Answer 4

I can understand how you feel & it's horrible when our mind does these things to us and we just wish it didn't. The trouble is that the more you worry about your worry the worse the worry gets. It's no good telling yourself to stop because it just doesn't happened, you need help - like a rescue boat to pull you out of the sinking mud before you get too deep. Have you ever thought about having hypnosis? This anxiety could stem from a previous life experience. You may not believe in reincarnation & I don't know that I totally do, I just know people that have had similar problems to you & have been helped in this way. My close friend had a fear of fire, really bad, even matches were a problem - when regressed it became apparent that she had been trapped in a fire in a previous life, leaving young children behind. This fear was worked through from the stem of the regression & she is now so much better. Good luck to you, I hope you can get out, you are not crazy - you have logical thought.

Answer 5

The important thing for you to remember is you aren't crazy. I also have the same type of recurring thoughts sometimes. Mine usually happen when I am lonely or bored. And please don't think you are the only person who has these types of thoughts. You do need to get help, though. I used to have really bad anxiety attacks. I have had them so bad before that I have gone to the hospital to be checked out. If there is a mental Health Clinic near your home, you need to make an appointment to see someone. It can do you a world of good to talk to someone about it. Good luck and I hope that you can get some help. Write me an email to tell me how you are doing. My address is in my profile. Take care.

Answer 6

It does sound as if you have an anxiety disorder, such as obsessive-compulsive disorder. The best idea is to find a therapist who does cognitive-behavioral therapy and who will also refer you to a psych MD to assess your need for medication. Cognitive-behavioral therapy is a form of therapy that helps you to evaluate your thoughts in relationship to your behaviors and moods and helps you to gain control of all of them. It does work best when it is combined with medications. Usually the medications are taken short-term to help you overcome the worst of the fear and anxiety that is surrounding your life and to gain control of your thoughts.

You are not crazy. With all that is happening in the last few weeks, it is really understandable that someone who has a tendency towards anxiety would have it become worse. Also, the fact that your father has a collection of guns, that presumably work, and that he may be experiencing a form of dementia would definitely tend to make the anxiety disorder more prominent. Please go to see a therapist so that you can regain control of your life again without these obsessive fears.

Answer 7

This could be a form of post tramatic stress syndrone stemming from your friends murder or it could be a panic disorder of some kind(mine was thinking i for sure had a brain tumor,bad heart,cancer,was dying of something) Yes bad things happen all the time and even to good ppl. the world can be scary but what you are feeling is not normal and you need help! get help because it will only get worse without treatment and you have to take that first step! Start by talking with your primaty care doctor and he or she will help you get help whether it is meds or counseling if you have money or not insurance or not.please get help! you can get better and not live in fear

Answer 8

i will't make a perfect analysis over the internet too nicely, yet from what you're describing, you're showing symptoms of stress and obsessional theory. both instruments of issues could have classes even as they are extra stated - it really is smart that the perfect man or woman might want to imagine themselves in a foul subject in the experience that they see human beings or listen about someone in that subject. i might want to opt to ask - are you extremely empathic? It appears like you're - empathy is usually a double-edged sword because it would want to finally end up making feeling human beings very liable to others in soreness. Your stress will merely worsen without remedy. fortunately your community psychological healthcare professional will be able which could help you. stress is amazingly person-pleasant yet a lot of human beings merely struggle through in silence and do not do something about it - each from time to time even searching for remedy might want to be a source of stress. Megumi has presented the concept of obsessive compulsive disease - with common and undesirable obsessional thoughts, it really is the source of the compulsive behaviour. You suggested being a perfectionist - does this recommend that you keep issues so as, say, on your position or at artwork? Do you've any rituals that merely about reason you actual soreness in case you won't be able to carry out them? Obsessive Compulsive disease is often linked with stress and think ofyou've got aspects of both that are affecting one yet another. besides the indisputable fact that, in case you do not have a balancing compulsive issue it would want to easily be an obsessional disease. you're waiting to vacation this out, yet you do not favor to. With CBT and perchance medicine, issues will really calm down for you. speaking because the ex-boyfriend of a honest few nerve-racking females and son of an nerve-racking mom, not merely you'll sense extra efficient yet so will your friends and kinfolk for this reason - that is fairly painful to computer screen someone you adore struggle through with the kind of issue. Your boyfriend will fairly savor seeing you feeling secure and satisfied.

Answer 9

You should see a therapist. It's an anxiety issue and they can help you deal with the recurring thoughts and the reasons why you have them. It's really not uncommon and they have some very good techniques for managing them.

Answer 10

You may be experiencing Panic Attacks. The doctor can try you out on some meds to see if it helps. Best of luck to you!!

Answer 11

Ashley, You know what, this reply is better off sent privately. I have some personal insight that may help you explore the things that torment you so...