I am really depressed tonight. Can someone help me.?

Question

Life just gets too damn hard sometimes.

Does bad karma ever go away. After 25 years of it, haven't I paid enough?

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=133753304

Answer 1

I nearly cried when I read your blog. I don't agree with a lot of your viewpoints here, but I always saw you as a good person. You were always among the first to reach out to someone hurting, Theist or Atheist.

I wish I could say something to make you feel that you don't deserve the hand that life dealt you. Yes, you hurt someone, but haven't we all? This Joe was an a$$hole. The only thing you did "wrong" was wanting to feel close to someone again. You didn't deserve what happened.

You are worth more than you have received from life. I truly hope you find the simple happiness and acceptance we all want so very much. If I could think of something to say that would ease your hurt, I would say it to you a thousand times.

Answer 2

I read your myspace blog. I can tell it took a lot out of you to write it, but it seemed cathartic? I tend to believe "putting something out there" is part of paying what you see as your karmic debt. So the person or people it's about probably won't see it, but other people will. And it will mean something different to each who sees it, but to at least one person it will resonate. Someone's life will change for reading it - even if it's only a very small change, it can't help but be a positive one. Some who read it will see it as a sorrowful tale - which it undoubtedly is - but some will be able to see beyond that to the strength of the person behind it. You are someone who has been through it all, but you are still here to tell the story, you have learned from it, and no matter how bad you feel tonight, tomorrow you will still be fighting the good fight.

Relationships are usually cruel in some way, most end badly, but all end somewhere along the line. To me it's about what you learn from even the hardest of them. I've been through a slightly tamer version of a lot of what you describe - then again it seems you've been spared some of the crap I've had to deal with! Depression sucks and there are no two ways about that. There is also no one sure-fire solution for each sufferer. But as a veteran sufferer I am sure you know what works for you. So do those things, try new things if you can, don't stress about it if you can't.

I hope something someone has said in all of this resonates with you. And that you find some internal peace - wherever that may lie - sooner rather than later.

*hugs* Spunky Texan Chick!

Answer 3

Bad karma is not the reason the toaster is giving you shocks everytime you stick the fork into it.

Think of karma as taking out a loan. The 'entity' to whom you owe the loan requires a certain amount of payment, usually fixed, over a given period of time, til the loan is repaid. The payment is meant to work within your 'spiritual/emotional' budget. Taking out a loan you have no hope of repaying serves no purpose, for it gives you no incentive to meet the payments and makes you more likely to 'default'.

Karmic loans are meant to be repaid, so they are doled out in increments of payable experience. However, if you have 2 or 3 loans out, and you start taking out 5 or 6 extra, that isn't the fault of the original 2 or 3 loans.

The bad karma you created against the person you loved is simply not being able to be with them, and they have an equal karmic debt to you because they could have 'forgiven' your debt and still be with you, but instead, they are seperated from you as well. In other words, no one can ever enact a karmic response in relationship without affecting themselves as well.

But that karmic debt has very little to do with your 'current' relationship problems. Karma is like spilling coffee on yourself because you are in too much of a hurry to securely fasten the lid; it explains the stain but it doesn't have anything to do with the bathroom not having hand soap to wash the spilled coffee off yourself. There would be no soap whether or not you would have spilled coffee on yourself.

You can't pay off your car by sending in extra on your gas bill. What affects your gas bill affects your gas bill, not your car payment. The same is true for karma. The karmic problem with yourself and your karmic problem with others are two different bills. You can't begin to pay off your karmic debt to someone else if you are struggling to pay off the debt you owe to yourself, and this is especially true if you keep adding more debt (bad experience to it.)

Karma isn't making you stick a fork in the toaster, which is keeping your fingers from healing from the shock it gets everytime you do the action. Karma isn't the cause, it is the affect. Stop sticking your fork in the toaster, and your fingers will stop hurting enough so that you can get back to eating your breakfast.

Answer 4

MySpace won't let me load the relevant blog entry. Stupid, stupid MySpace and the fact that it doesn't play well with Macs.

I have no answer for the question of why life gets so hard. All I know is that it does, and it can be horribly difficult from time to time.

I've been in your shoes -- just came out of them a couple of days ago, in fact. I know what it's like to feel the grinding ache of depression.

All I can really do over the long-distance medium of the Internet is offer you a virtual hug, and some adorable pictures of cats to possibly distract you:

http://community.livejournal.com/kittypix/

Hang in there. This, too, shall pass.

Answer 5

Life can SUCK big time, but the alternative isn't exactly all that great either! I have found that when I volunteer to help others who are worse off than I am, it helps keep life in perspective and tends to repay back a lot of *lost* karma points ( and I'm not even religious!)
P.S. I checked out your myspace. You put a LOT of work into it!
Looks great! Wish that i had some words of wisdom for you.

Answer 6

Umm, no I can't help. Anything I say will only sound terribly hollow, and really can't provide any relief.
I feel the reverse as my wife left me, etc. (what a lot of pain that was.) but I have felt much better because my son is old - and remembers me, loves me. Your right in that our children have brought so much joy into our lives.
Having sworn off women, in the hermit lifestyle of old may be a mistake, but I feel better for now.
(No mountain cave, but hmm if I could find one with cable...)
I could type cliche's and recommend professionals but your an adult, as I read, so I hope your depression ends very soon.

Answer 7

Wow! What did you do to deserve 25 years of bad karma! You know if you think you don't deserve a good life, then that's what will happen. You get what you bring in, think negatively...bring in negativity. I also suspect you have more going for you than you think. Compare yourself to someone in Iraq or Africa right now, or someone in prison doing time for something they did not do, etc......there see, your life is not that bad is it?

I have been there....you will get through it. Tommorrow is a brand new day.................Good luck

Tomorrow, to gain some good karma points, go out and volunteer for some good cause......no excuses! You will begin to feel better...good luck

Answer 8

if i didn't have bad karma i wouldn't have any karma at all. he he , j Leno is coming up on the tonight show so have a good laugh.or take a walk and hug a tree.and watch some animals playing in the park near you,its hard to be sad when you tune into there play fullness.

Texas's is rather depress in so move to fayetteville Arkansas

Answer 9

I wrote you a message, and here is a silly nothing.

BUDDHA told this parable: A traveler, fleeing a tiger who was
chasing him, ran till he came to the edge of a cliff. There he
caught hold of a thick vine, and swung himself over the edge.

Above him the tiger snarled. Below him he heard another snarl, and
behold, there was another tiger, peering up at him. The vine
suspended him midway between two tigers.

Two mice, a white mouse and a black mouse, began to gnaw at the
vine. He could see they were quickly eating it through. Then in
front of him on the cliffside he saw a luscious bunch of grapes.
Holding onto the vine with one hand, he reached and picked a grape
with the other.

How delicious!

Answer 10

Hi. I have no wish to offend you, but I'm a Christian. I will do the only thing I know to, I will pray for you. Life is not always easy for any of us, but I know God has carried me through many trying and depressing situations. I tried to access your first blog, so I could pray more specifically, but the page wouldn't come up. God knows your situation anyway, and I will be praying to Him for you. I really do care.