what to do if you don't know a co-worker's name?

Question

There's this girl I chat with from time to time at work. Nothing heavy, just small-talk stuff. She's not in my department, and I have NO idea what her name is! Is there a way I can find out without her knowing that I don't know? It makes me feel kind of guilty. I mean, you can just chat with someone for 4 months and suddenly be like "oh, by the way, what's your name again?" can you?

Answer 1

I have a pretty big department, and I hate not knowing names. What I did once was tell this girl to shoot me an email so I had her address to forward something to her that I thought she's "be interested in". It's a really great way to get a name!


Or think of the "mulva" or "bovary" situation from Seinfeld. :)

Answer 2

There are several ways to find out:

1. Just come out an ask. Be embarrassed for about a minute.
Your life will go on.
2. Ask someone in her department.
3. Does she have a name plate on her desk? If so, look at it.
4. Does your place of employment have a staff directory? By process of elimination, you may be able to find out that way.
5. Ask her to send you an e-mail (this is what others have suggested). You can ask if she has good recipe for chocolate chip cookies or something like that.
Then, write down her name and put is someplace safe.

Answer 3

Well, you might check around her desk casually to see if there's anything with her name on it. But, these situations are less embarrassing than they feel at the time -- just say, "hey - we've chatted from time to time, but it just occurred to me that we never were really introduced and I don't know your first name...." If you say "I don't know your FIRST name" it implies you do know her last name. Even if you don't, don't worry about it. She'll tell you who she is and you'll laugh about it. And, then you just say how bad you are with names.

Then drop it. It'll be in the past. You'll be friends. Don't dramatize it.

Answer 4

Go to work one day, and pretend that you are forgetting everything, but in a joking way. Then, as a joke, say wait what was your name again? Or introduce her to a freind, and have the firend say something like, "I'm sorry I didn't here your name."
Make sure the friend knows the plan first though!

Answer 5

I think it's fine to ask her directly if you preface your question with something like, "I'm so embarrassed that I don't know, but..."

Maybe when you're nearby you could scan her desk for something with her name on it, or if you know what her job title is, see if you can narrow it down by looking at a company directory.

Answer 6

I would say something like: "I have a friend with the
same name as yours and I love it.
How do you spell yours?"
It would work for almost any name.
For example, Kathy could be spelled Cathy, or
Diane could be Dianne, Carol could be Carole, etc.
This works with me all the time! lol

Answer 7

I would be honest and say to her I have never refered to you by name because I don't think that we have ever been formally introduced, my name is ... and you are... Don't you find it odd to have conversations with a person and never use their name ?

Answer 8

my answer is you could try to do as i do from time to time. just listen very carefully if someone even comes near to her and she or he just might reveal that persons name with out even suspecting that it was a dilemma to you . or --- you could just nonchalantly let her know you would like to add her to your address book or email but you would require the "correct" spelling of her name.

Answer 9

You can sneak around it by introducing her to a new person. Say "I'd like you to meet Jane Doe" and she will be sure to say her name in return.

Answer 10

Just be honest and say you're bad with names.