How can I share my religion with my son?

Question

I am Pagan and very proud of that fact, but I have a three year old son that I love very much. At first I wanted to keep him neutral, so that he will grow up to choose his own religion. Then I relized that would leave him open to every nut job Christian to tell him that he is going to hell for not beleiving in Jesus. I want my son to be open to new thoughts and ideals, and not confined to any one just thing. \
Serious answers only please.

My defination of a nut job Christian: the kind of person who will get violent with you for not beleiving in the same God that they do. I experienced alot of that growing up with my mom and others.

Answer 1

The primary mistakes most adults make in teaching children is leaving out the whys. Not "Why this is," but "Why I do this." Three-year-olds are very literal and trusting. They will accept whatever they are told unless it conflicts with what they've already been told (and then they will try to harmonize the conflicting ideas). And they will think in concrete terms, not abstract. (The Goddess will be a real woman, living out in the woods somewhere.)

The value of an upringing in a religious tradition is in the practice it gives a person to deal with symbols and ideals. The pitfall is the assumption that mine is the only valid sprituality. Steering a middle course between "real" and "pretend" is very hard for most people, since their own personal spiritual paradigm seriously informs their moral standards. To compare foundational myths is to risk questioning one's own sincerity.

I would suggest inviting your son to participate in your faith life, stressing that these are things that *I* or *we* do, and why. You can tell him that other people believe and practice differently, and that some day he will need to find his own spiritual path. At some point, he may ask about other faiths and you should answer as well and respectfully as you can (or ask a believer to, respectfully, help answer). Don't rush that on him. He is very young.

Children love to learn rituals. It gives them a sense of accomplishment and of control over their environment, whether it's "real" or "make-believe" (which they determine based on what adults say). They will take it seriously but not in the way you do as an adult.

Every faith tradition teaches its children a simplified version of its truths, out of necessity. But some adherents never grow up (or aren't invited to). It is important to learn critical thinking so one can question, evaluate and take ownership of one's spiritual path. But there needs to be something to question. Children need to learn how and why their parents behave as they do, so they can imitate your modelling, then test the value and consistency of the standards when the time comes.

Let him participate, keep him informed, and honestly answer his questions as they come. (And let none of us take ourselves too seriously!)

Answer 2

Well, I believe that when a child is growing up, religion is very important for them to learn/know about. Religion teaches a child a lot of things, which would include responsibilities etc. So for you, I'd say that be an example for him. When you give charity, tell your son that you are doing it because God wants us to help each other out. When you pray, get him involved and tell him why you pray and that he should also pray. While doing all this, tell him that Muslims pray five times daily, Christians go to church on Sundays, Hindus have a temple, etc. This way he will also know a little bit about other religions.

Good luck, and you are in my prayers.

Answer 3

i am a pagan mom of 3 kids ages 9, 12, 14. they have been raised with many different religions and can choose to walk any path they wish.

your statement
"Then I realized that would leave him open to every nut job Christian is offensive. christianity has many great qualities and your son will judge them for himself.

the best thing any parent can do for their child is give them knowledge. knowledge is power. the only thing about christianity that i told my kids to never believe was that they are sinners. i explained my reasons and told them to never let anyone make them feel guilty for something they didn't do.

anyway, nurture your son, show him your way of life, but don't force him to live it. chances are, like with my children, they will really enjoy what paganism has to offer.

blessed be

Answer 4

I would share my beliefs with my child, but explain that there are other beliefs out there and it is the nature of beliefs that you have to pick what makes sense to you (even though he's 3, it's good to start now). I would include him in some of the aspects and keep explaining that he needs to learn about many religions. He will never be neutral, so I would just let him know that your beliefs are just one of many possible while including him in some of the traditions.

It's keeping the options open that all parents need to do.

Answer 5

I'm dealing with this myself. I'm a Satanist, but many of my beliefs are very Pagan in nature -- I'm polytheistic and I believe that our gods and goddesses choose us. My daughter (who is 4) has been asking alot of questions about "God" and I've really been at a loss of words for what to tell her.

Obviously, I don't expect that my daughter will automatically relate to what I refer to as Satan. And I don't want to indoctrinate her with my beliefs. However, I don't want to leave her in the same situation that you fear for your son.

At this point, I have told her that "God" is different things to different people and that when she gets older, she'll know what God means to her, too. And I told her that anything that God is to her is okay, and nobody else can decide that for her. Then, she told me that she thinks that God is in the sky -- and that when it rains, that's God coming down to fix things that are broken. As a matter of fact, we had a shower the other day, and she waved out the window and said, "Hi, God!"

I don't doubt that this will not be the last conversation we have about God and religion, but I'm going to try my best to reinforce these things as she grows up, and encourage her to do what's right for HER -- not for me or anyone else. Good luck!

Answer 6

I cannot offer you any guidance in the matter. I think I would be classified as a nut-job in your book because I believe in Christ, but I am a little confused as to why you would think that I would believe in Hell as a punishment for disbelief in Jesus. Hell is death, so your son will be going there regardless of his beliefs or disbeliefs. We all go there.
With my two children. I give them bits of wisdom that I think are wisdom and then ask them how they feel about it. They are never wrong for any view point they express, I merely give them my understanding as a foundation and consider their views as always rational (even though some are just plain funny, they never know I see it that way), I give them confidence in trying to comprehend by acknowledging their take on my viewpoints as plausible.

Answer 7

I think you're doing great so far :) If you're engaged in some religious ceremonies, keep him a part of it. He'll eventually ask you why you're doing this so you'll have a chance to explain. I say keep doing what you've been doing and let him come up with questions by himself. Good luck, you're in my prayers ~hugs~

EDIT: I just read some responses you got. I simply don't get these people. You see, I'm a Muslim but I respect your path so much simply because it's the one YOU chose and because it works well for you. I just don't understand the urge to constantly convert people.

Answer 8

You can tell by some of these christian responses that you are doing the right thing. It's a shame we feel the need to protect our children from these people.

My mother-in-law told my daughter that if she continued to read Harry Potter, she will let demons into her life and she will eventually go to hell. She said this to a 10 year old. Does my daughter need to be protected from these people? Without a shadow of doubt.

Answer 9

The best teaching is by example. Also, forcefull teaching leads to rebellion.

I learned my own spirituality not from people who know all about "what God said" but from people who serve as the best examples.

There's an old saying in the Far East: "The truth, once spoken, is no longer true."

Answer 10

A) ALL religions settle for the life of a few Being extra beneficial than humanity. this is WHY they are mentioned as "faith" extremely than "philosophy" or "economics". and that's the sole "middle concept" they should share. B) for people who state categorically that guy won't be able to understand what God particularly is or what He needs, you're the two appropriate and incorrect. In and of ourselves you're appropriate; we won't be able to understand. yet nowhere, even in the great print, does that circumvent God from letting us in on Himself and showing Himself to us. And Jews, Christians and to a lesser quantity, Muslims, all believe that He did only that. so which you ought to that quantity, you're incorrect. C) in case you like a private courting with Deity, this is maximum suitable to bypass alongside with regardless of Deity had the decency to clue you in. That places you squarely in the Abrahamic triad. D) in the journey that your in straight forward terms concern is to stay a good regulation-abiding life, you do no longer % faith, you % a ethical philosophy. No church, temple, synagogue or mosque is going to offer you only that and not the rest, so stay faraway from them. E) and don't be shocked approximately reincarnation, particularly because of the fact the Hindus and the Buddhists do no longer possibly prepare reincarnation in step with se. They prepare transmigration of souls. learn the version. F) all and sundry can say something they % to approximately God. only bear in mind, sometime you're gonna croak after which you will understand for helpful. i'm going to put in a good word for you.