Why am I such a Contradiction?

Question

Why am I such a Contradiction?

• Had very obvious spiritual and psychic experiences.
• Most profound experience was a transcendent experience after going to St David’s Cathedral and praying for guidance.
• During a very lengthy and serious illness, drove hundreds of miles around Britain visiting cathedrals
• Do not accept Jesus as my Saviour
• Do not accept Jesus as the Son of God
• Absolutely adamant that Jesus existed and the miracles occurred
• Absolutely certain that the Bible is very important but often mistranslated and misunderstood.
• Absolutely certain that all religions originate from genuine encounters between God and man.
• Not brought up with a religion
• Around my house there are candle holders with Mary and Jesus on them. On my bedroom wall are two small wooden crosses and a plaque from my great grandmother that says “God hath Heard My Supplication.” I also have my grandmother’s rosary hanging up somewhere in the house.
• In my bedside cabinet is my Bible. Where ever I’ve lived I’ve taken the Bible with me.
• I repeatedly say I am not a Christian
• Am the first to question and criticise Christians.

It’s almost as if I am a Christian and am not a Christian at the same time.

Answer 1

You're confused, self obsessed and probably a bit vain and conceited.

Edit- Okay I was being polite but the thumbs down mean I need to be more blunt- you're a nut. A complete screwball.

Answer 2

The essence of what you are saying is true of many of my friends and of myself. You are clearly prepared to accept the supernatural and spiritual but your main religious knowledge/experience so far seems to be Christian. In turn you seem to put your feelings into a context of Christian and non-Christian.

I went to a Church of England (Christian protestant) school but as I grew beyond 10 years old or so I became aware that there were other beliefs and personal/spiritual philosophies and practices. I read myself around most of these from Krishna Consciousness, Hinduism, Buddhism, Christianity, Judaism, Rastafarianism, Wicca and Pagan ideas and so on - I didn't read up on Islam simply because I felt I had dealt with organised religion by then or I would have read a little of that too.

From that I learned that I don't think organised religion holds the key. I also came out of the process feeling that I still believed in a kind of soul / spirit and that I believe in a lot of supernatural / psychic phenomena. I also believe the ability to experience such things is within most people. All of the religions and religious texts seem to have threads of clear truth and wisdom in them as well as a lot of - what I consider to be - nonsense. They have all been edited through time by people aiming to use the texts for their own purposes. This means that they are impure if they ever held a key and that they contain contradictions as well as sense.

Your confusion (as to what you believe) is a perfectly normal response to anyone seeking meaning from the world. You are probably on track and probably will always have some kind of spiritual side. If it is of any consequence I encounter things every day that I can't yet form an opinion on or even establish how I feel about. Good luck.

Answer 3

When u do not accept JESUS as your saviour how do u become a christian and if u arnt a christian u are a non christian.Where in lives ur confussion or contradiction.

When u do accept JESUS neither think JESUS as the son of GOD why do u considering asking christians questions surely what ever answer they give u ,u will always find something in it to please u thats its a flaw.


But the truth is.Every line in the bible is true.It aint given by man it was given by GOD.

It all started when adam sinned.Because GOD is holy he cant have sin in his presence.so man got seperated from GOD.

So GOD needs something to pay the penalty of sin.JESUS was the perfect sacrifice for our penalty.So JESUS came to earth lived among us and died for us on the cross.JESUS was the penalty.

GOD loves u so much that he sent his son JESUS to die for u to reconcile u back.

John 3:16 says "For GOD so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whoso ever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life".Ask JESUS to come into your heart and forgive ur sins and cleanse ur past with his blood.

With a simple prayer like above u can be saved.

The above thing must clear ur confussion and contradiction if it doesnt why dont u pray to JESUS about ur confussions and contradictions than surely JESUS will answer ur pray.

Answer 4

St. Paul described your condition in the third chapter of 2nd Timothy:

2 Timothy 3:5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

You are fascinated by the outward trappings of religion, but you have no interest in knowing the reality of Who Christ is. You reject Him as your Lord and Savior and criticize those who do love Him. You are "Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." (2 Timothy 3:7)

Christianity isn't about cathedrals, religious objects, or surface appearances. It's about repenting of your sins and accepting Christ's atoning death on the Cross. Anything else is just outward show and self-delusion.

Answer 5

"It's almost as if I am a Christian and am not a Christian at the same time".

I live and breathe those words and I'm glad someone else has the same views. For example when you stated that the Bible is often mistranslated and misunderstood. That is a certainty, especially in the teachings of Christendom. There are multiple hypocritical views in the churches of Christendom that teach one thing, but lives by another.

Answer 6

God is trying to get a hold of your mind. He already has your heart! Try taking the bible out of your bedside stand and reading it. Start in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. Decide for yourself if Jesus is real. If He did miracles where did the power come from?(God the Father) Look at all the places where Jesus invites you to believe in Him and be His follower! When He was born He was fully man and fully God. If you read from the scriptures you will find all the answers your looking for-and if you don't, call a pastor.

Answer 7

I am a Christian, so you may agree with me or not. But, it is very clear to me that God is "wooing" you. The Holy Spirit is ministering to you. I suggest you sit down and have a serious talk with God. You should say everything you have on your mind, good and bad. God can take it. You are right, you are a contradiction. Seek God's advice and help, He won't let you down.
Good luck.

Answer 8

It seems you are at least as deeply conflicted as I am, each in our own unique ways. I've found the R&S to be a very effective thearapy which seems to be helping me work through my issues. Hope it works well for you, too.

Answer 9

Maybe you should think about why you are saying that you are not. You obviously believe that Jesus existed and that HIS miracles occured. WHy not just make the leap and accept HIM? Walk in your own truth and not what others who also dont believe have told you. Peace

Answer 10

Ur experiences r of ur previous impressions on mind. There is no need to hold on to these experiences.

Listen to ur heart than mind for this purpose. Contradictions would disappear by itself.

There is no need to get branded by any religion.

Answer 11

I do no see much contradiction.
summarizing i read : doesnt accept jesus , does read bible , thinks about both.

i think you are searching thats all.