What to do ? my 5yrs teacher told me she is going to retain her in kindergarden.?

Question

my 5 yr old is having problems keeping up with the rest of the class but I also know that when she being tested she like freezes up. like she knows it but can't do it when put on the spot. i really don"t know if retaining her is for the best or it will hurt her in the long run.

Answer 1

Most teachers agonize over the issue of whether to retain a child or pass him to the next grade level. This decision is not made without a great deal of thought and usually includes the input of the principal as well as other staff, such as a learning specialist if available in your school district. It is not a time to panic, but a time to discuss with the teacher the facts and decide what is best for your daughter. If your daughter repeats kindergarten, it is not a direct reflection on your parenting skills nor on her intelligence. Some children just need an extra year of one particular grade level to develop the maturity and skills they need to be successful throughout the rest of their education. In my professional opinion, kindergarten is one of the easier grades to repeat since at that age, there is no stigma attached to repeating a grade. Ultimately, as her parent, it is your choice to send her on to first grade or to keep her in kindergarten. Generally, the recommendations of the teacher are reliable. You know your child best, but her teacher knows her learning style best. One plus for repeating kindergarten is that she will gain quite a bit of confidence since she will most likely be at the top of the class instead of always at the bottom playing keep up. "Freezing up" during testing time will also likely ease as she realizes that she DOES know the answers. You can help her at home by making sure that you encourage her to do her best and not focusing on getting everything right. Some children just naturally want perfection in all they do and some feel a pressure to be perfect (can be real or imagined). For those who are shocked about testing in kindergarten, this is simply to find out how a child is developing such as how high can she count, can she name colors and shapes, does she interact with the other children, can she follow directions with 1, 2, or 3 steps, etc. It involves as much observation as it does using standardized testing formats.

Answer 2

Many times retention is the best thing for a child. Of course you need to be a part of it. you should ask to see work and also ask for a meeting to discuss the benefits of this. Is your child a young Kindergartner? When will she be 6?
At the end of K a child is expected to know her alphabet. Not say abcdefg..... to recognize the letters as well as the sounds they produce. They should be able to write their whole name and phone number. They should be able to count to 100, classify objects in a group and start to blend phonemic sounds to read phonetic words (ie cat, top, pot, hat...) Can your child do this?

Most teachers don't base a decision solely on tests, they know kids panic, they base it on observation and classwork and where the child is in comparison to the rest of the class as well as other's opinions.

Retention is good when the child is not ready for what will be expected in 1st grade. at the end of first grade a child should be able to read 128 sight words. If said child doesn't have all the letter sounds down by the beginning of first grade it will be harder to do.

Sometimes retention hurts a childs self esteem, but it is only temporary and with a lot of encouragement can be overcome. Sometimes even if it doesn't hurt their self esteem it doesn't do any good. If they do the exact same thing the second yr as they did the first then they have only reinforced what the child already knew. That's fine but the object is to find a different approach and learn new things, that they were unable to do the previous year.

It is a tough decision and one you should not take lightly. If you move the child ahead and she wasn't ready she will be behind the rest of her class and may feel dumb (kids say cruel things) then she may end up behind for years and needing to be held back later. On the other hand, if you retain her this year and she was already really close to being ready for 1st grade she nay get bored and lose interest in school and it may hurt her self esteem once she realizes that she was held back and is now older than the rest of her class.

Think hard about this. Ask the teacher if summer school or extra summer tutoring would help rather than holding her back. Good luck in whatever you decide, you can turn it into a positive experience no matter which way you go.

Answer 3

You need to have a sit down with the teacher and the princpil to find out all that is going on in the class. The teacher is seeing things that concern her about your child. Dont condem yet. She might be worried if she's not doing well now that you put her in 1st grade she won't be able to keep up. My son was put thought to 1st grade and I wanted him held back and the teacher wouln't do it. After a month he was put back into kindergarden. If it has to be done it's a lot easier now than it will be in a few years and think about how that will affect your daughter, if she can't keep up. It will be very fustrating for her. And bring down her self esteem. Putting my son back was the best thing I could of done for him. I would do it all over again. Please just have a sit down with the teacher and get all the details, at least you have a teacher that actually wants to help your child.Good luck to you and your daughter

Answer 4

Retention's not the answer. Research by the US Early Childhood Longitudinal Study Kindergarten shows that holding a child back in Kindergarten is not helpful, and that a child that continues on to 1st grade does just fine.

One of the key points from the study is this: "Kindergarten retention seemed to have constrained the learning potential of all but the highest-risk children." A child does worse by being held back unless they are of the highest-risk category.

Do more reading on this issue and approach the principal and teacher. Some one-on-one work over the summer may help as well. Read the links provided below. I was on the fence holding my son back in Kindergarten, and I'm glad I didn't. He's doing just great in 1st grade.

Answer 5

If she's having problems in kindergarden its not going to get any better once she gets into first grade. Talk to her teacher if there is anything you can do to make her feel more prepared for when she takes a test. Try giving her make up test at home and timing her and see how she does. Or try talking to her and see if something is stopping her from testing well. Whatever the case letting her go to first grade won't help if she isn't ready.

Answer 6

It really depends on the criteria that is being used to determine advancement to first grade. Does the school expect her to be reading by now? I would arrange a conference between you, the teacher and the principal in this matter. Do it now, before the end of the school year, or you may not have any say in the matter for next school year.

Answer 7

I have a cousin who was held back in kindergarten, and it was the best thing for her. She's now 27 and is perfectly fine. If your daughter is having problems, it won't hurt her to stay back. Next year she'll be able to keep up, and by the time she's in high school, no one will be able to tell the difference between her and the other kids.

Answer 8

Kindergarten is not a coloring class anymore. The expectations are getting higher by the day. Most kids read and even learn to write in their journals although most of them still get confused with "b" and "d" and so on. I think that you should have a conference the teacher and ask about her concerns.

Answer 9

Don't let it upset you. It will better prepare her for first grade. I have a first grader that won't be 7 until summer. I have wished many times over that we had kept him back before kindergarten. (He's immature.) Being a year older and more mature can only help her in the long run.

Answer 10

I was held back in first grade. I didn't believe there was a reason for it then and I still don't believe that I should have. I ended up taking many honors courses and received A's on a very regular basis. Always get a second opinion. It was traumatic for me to have to explain to other students why I was older and then to have them judge me. Your daughter might need to be held back. I did not. Make sure you do what is right for her though.