ARE YOU KIDDING? YES YES YES!!!! if she registered and left all that information she is waiting for you. go for it!!
i am an adoptee myself and i found my birthmother a few years ago, i think it was one of the few things i did do right in my life. i have brothers i love and she is a very importent part of my life. i dont call her mom, she isnt my mom, she is lori. and she is good with that
i know many adoptions are not as open and comfortable as mine was. i found theresa here in y!a and she has shown me what a dark side some people have been exposed to, it is nothing short of tragic. it is supposed to be a gift of love, to give your child a chance for something you couldnt give, i think its sick some people have twisted that simple idea.
be prepared for some hostility, a lot of people i have met feel that way, i dont understand it, i never felt that way. i could appreciate what she gave me, my life was far from perfect, trust me, but overall, i turned out ok.
sorry for the rambling, adoption issues tend to make me do that, any way, contact her. if it turns out bad then you know in your heart you did everything you could. if it turns out good, then you have a wonderful addition to your life.
GOOD LUCK!! and happy reunion. i am so excited for you
2007-04-26 10:33:29
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answer #1
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answered by rachael 5
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Since she was registered on an adoption website, she was trying to find you as well. I would take it slow with her, but since you have her e-mail address, it would be easy to contact her. Hopefully, this is the child you placed for adoption in 1987.
If you don't mind, what adoption website did you find her on? I am trying to locate someone as well, without success so far!
2007-04-26 12:26:30
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answer #2
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answered by wedgemom 4
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As someone who is adopted (and met her biological mom) yes. BUT, you must be comfortable in doing so.
Please understand that she is going to have a lot of questions for you, some tough. And there may be things that she needs to know.
My mom looked for me when I turned 19, funny thing is, I was planning to look for her too. It was awkward and weird, but 17 years later, we still talk. Dont always agree, but we do love eachother.
The truth is, you likely are wanting to meet her too inside, afterall, you did check the registry.
Maybe meet at a counsellors office for the first meet. There is going to be anxiety to a certain degree on both sides. Its a good neutral place to meet and the counsellor can help with all the emotions the both of you will feel. I'd also recommend making that first meeting just the 2 of you with the counsellor, unless she's really nervous and wants her adoptive parents there too. They are also likely wanting to meet you... and that will be positive too.
Its evident she wants to meet you, can you blame her?
You can mail me if you have questions about this.
Good luck and glad to hear the two of you might meet!
(note: she will have questions about her dad too. Maybe now would be the time to try and find photos of him and whatever you do, dont speak negatively about him. It will really hurt her)
2007-04-26 04:45:16
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answer #3
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answered by Paramedic Girl 7
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Yes,and then work toward haveing a long talk about always loving her even if you could not have been there through out her child hood ,I also had a lil girl back in 1987 ,but she past on at 2weeks old, she was born August 2,1987.
2007-04-26 04:49:34
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answer #4
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answered by Red 1
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Yes I would, and she is also reaching out to you by placing it so you could find her. You can be her friend and just maybe she looking for her Mother. I lot of kids need to know they mother and father. She will ask you why you let her go just tell her and God will bless you both and you can have agood friend, and have your child, She also will have the enpty part of her your soul will come together you always have a missing part of puxxle fill. Call her and plan a lunch or a walk in the parl. started slow. let her talk to you and listern with your haet.
2007-04-26 04:43:56
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answer #5
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answered by ? 3
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Contacting her would not pose a serious concern for me. But I would get to know her better before meeting with her or inviting her into my home. Also it may be a good idea to do some research on her with the adoption agency.
Also before you do all of that consider whether or not you want to raise a grown woman first.
2007-04-26 04:35:36
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answer #6
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answered by Nette 1
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I would be interested to know how old you are and what your intentions are for contacting her. I assume you have been looking for her.
My initial instinct was to say "dont die wondering" but i guess it depends on whether you are happy for her to know who you are - there is no "unknowing" who you are once you meet. Do you want a long term relationship with her now
I imagine it was very hard to give her up - i bet you have wondered about her for a long time
2007-04-26 04:38:31
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answer #7
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answered by Boo Boo 5
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YES! DO IT NOW! If she is registered on an adoption website, you can't possible comprehend the amount of hope and love she has for you! Get off Yahoo answers and contact her now, please! I am so happy for you!!!!!!!!
2007-04-26 11:42:41
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answer #8
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answered by Theresa 5
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Of course, I would. In fact, I love daughters. However, since she is 19, one has to be cautious before adoption. Find out as to how she behaves, who are her friends, etc.
2007-04-26 04:31:43
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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Yes, Im sure that she wants to know who you are. It's sad when you grow up your whole entire life not knowing what your mother is like and what you have in common. I hope that you chose to see her and that everything goes great. GOOD LUCK
2007-04-26 04:32:37
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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