My mom is a Jehovah Witness?

Question

I am 27 and I got out of the religion when I was 18 I have been married 5 years and have 2 kids.Every year my mom gives me her magazines and invites me to her memorials they have once a year.She knows I am not going but she does it any way and it affends' me a little like she doesn't respect me of my life choice.A month ago she asked me and i flat out said NO and i think I hurt her feelings,I didn't say it mean or rude i just said too fast with out thinking about like i think she wanted me too.How do i tell her to stop asking me to attend with out hurting her or sounding rude?Her throwing her religion at me makes me uncomfortable.She thinks i am going to come back someday like some young people do after years of being away from it,but thats just not going to happen,when i dropped that religion i dropped it for good.

Answer 1

sorry for the trouble you are having with your mom,
my friend Keyleah, her mom was jehovah witness. but not anymore.
and the religion teaches them to only talk and be friends with poeple who are the same religion...
tell her about other religion.
give her books. be very nice to her.
make her meet other people.
and tell her the truth...... she will get mad with you but then she will understand. give her gifts, and be nice to her. and just say sorry mom, but i dont like the religion.

or make up something if she wants you to go with her.
tell her you have some other things to do.
i'm just trying to help you, is hard, i can understand your pain.
Good lucky.

Answer 2

I've been disfellowshipped 25 years and my mother still doesn't give up. It is a part of their dedication to family and feeling what is best for them.

There are several presumptions above that you are still following a Christian faith, and I will reflect that, so let's look at your children. What if they decide to join a faith that denies Christ existed at all, or had no significant importance. Would you let it go, not give Christmas presents, or do anything Christian around your grandchildren so as not to hurt your children's newly found views? I think not.

You are your mother's child, and will always be. She wants to see you and her grandchildren in the new system of things, with everlasting life. Actually, that might also be an extreme issue of what goes around comes around, since in the new system, the Bible talks about children of 100 years of age. That would mean the terrible 2s lasting 20 years, and the teen years lasting 50+ years.

Answer 3

I know it's a difficult thing for your mother to hear, but your choice in religion is just that - YOUR choice. She did her part by raising you in the religion, now it's up to you to either stick with it or drop it.
But there's no reason for you to be offended by this. Obviously the JW religion is important to your mother, and she wants to continue to share that part of her life with you. Have you chosen another religion? Perhaps inviting your mother to a ceremony for a different faith might help to make the point that you've moved on. And who knows? Maybe she'd be comfortable there too.

Answer 4

She is your Mom, she loves you and will always have hope
that someday things may change. Just give her a polite no
and let it go. You never know, people change as life hits
them with all sorts of ups and downs, but
your mom will always love you. Think about your kids, if they
make some life decisions you don't agree with down the road, you'll still love them and have hope that they will end
up having a happy life. That's all your mom wants for you.

Answer 5

Your best bet is too write her a letter. Most people I know write, then rewrite, their letter so they can make sure it comes across right (one exception is my sister in law, who wrote about as fast as she thought, so if she was mad, the letter came out mad too:D)

Clearly you understand her reasoning. She doesn't do it to be mean or offensive she is just making sure you know the door is open. Chances are she will always want to offer. If you can come to accept her asking, it will probably work best. This way she gets to know she is letting you know the door is open, and in turn you get to show you are not interested.

You certainly don't have to accept the magazines.

I doubt she will ever give up hoping you will come back. My oldest brother hasn't been a Witness in about 17 years, and I still hope he will return. I respect that his life is his choice, but I can't help how I feel. We don't talk much now, for various reasons, but when I see him I don't hide my beliefs from him anymore than he does his.

My nonWitness family members still like to wish me a merry Christmas, even though they know how I feel. They don't do it to be mean. I realise that if I am around them I can expect this.
Hope this helps.

Answer 6

Aw - fishing for answers.

Moms are very special. God brought you in to this world through her - she loves you.
This is why she continues to ask you.
Can you love her anyway?
Can you be at peace with just loving her from afar?

The poor lady thinks your going to suffer from the second death.
How very sad, worried, sick to death this sect has taught your mom to be.

She is very worried about her daughter - she may even be desparately praying - it must be very painful for her and all you are is angry.

You know how you can worry about your babies - think of how your mom worries about you.

She obviously wants to have a relationship with you.
But do to the nature of how the JWs treat family members that have been in or around and "Just say No" - you know!She may not be able to reach out to you any other way.

So take it as a I'm thinking of you and want to spend time with you but cannot - now you are an adult and have chosen not to be a JW.

It is very sad how JWs split families in some areas - not all but some.

Answer 7

First of all I would like to respond to achtungs comment. That was very rude of you and very unloving. Comments like that reflect on all your other fellow JWs. Those unkind remarks are what people remember and hence give you guys a bad name! Shame on you!

Now on to the question...
I was raised a JW by my mum and around 27 years old I realised that this was a religon I did not want to be a part of. I would say that telling my mum about my decision was the hardest moment of my life. I didn't want to hurt her. What I ended up doing was going to her house and sitting down with her. I asked her to acknowledge how unhappy I was as a JW. I talked about why I was so unhappy. I explained to her that despite it being the hardest decision of my life I was not going to be returning to meetings. I also requested her to respect my decision as much as I respected her beliefs. That I would prefer if she doesn't involve me in the religon any more and I will not put her down or make deroagtory remarks about her beliefs. It worked by the way.

The important thing to note here is that if you speak in a mature calm manner, if you tell your mum that you will continue to respect her, the conversation is more likely to have a positive outcome. It might be okay to slip in an apology for hurting her as well but explain why you reacted like that.

Good luck!

Answer 8

Your calling your self Catholic but want to shack up with your boy friend. I do not believe in the JW's teachings but if his mother is successful your out of the picture and no shacking up. At least they will teach him some Morals that you apparently failed to learn. And your lazy writing is irritating and juvenile. You say at the end you believe what you were taught growing up? Well i know the Church does not teach living together without the sacrament of Marriage.

Answer 9

Good for you for sticking to your guns. First, sit your mom down and explain to her in the nicest way possible that while you respect her choice of religion, that is not what works for you. Everyone has their own path to walk in life and you've chosen yours. That's ok. She has to learn to respect that fact because you're an adult and you're allowed to choose whatever religion you want. Also tell her that when she asks you to those things, it does make you uncomfortable but that you love her and you're happier without that way of life. If she can't accept that, you're going to have to ask yourself if you want to cut her out of your life (worst case scenario here). Hopefully she'll realize what she sees as gentle pushing is really irritating and she'll stop. Good luck & remember, try not to get too emotional and be nice about it. No need to belittle her choices or anything. She's entitled to that life just as you're entitled to not follow her choice of religion.

Answer 10

If your mum taught you anything it would have been that a Witness does not give up on their family.Your mum like the rest of us with non witness relatives hope and pray that one day before it's too late that you all come into the truth.
I also feel that your mum may feel bloodguilt if she didnt ask you.And she may even feel responsible for you leaving the truth.
I dont understand why you would feel offended just because your mum loves you and doesnt want to give up on you.