Stay at home moms?

Question

I'm a stay at home mom to a 14 month old, now that he is walking and getting into everything I feel like I am constantly cleaning my house and not spending as much time as I used to with him. He is on a schedule for naps and bedtime, I do alot of housework when he goes down for his nap, after we get baths done, get my son in the bed, the house is in such a mess, AGAIN. Once my son is in the bed, I just want some time for myself. Has any other stay at home moms dealt with this and could you also tell me how your day usually goes and do you do your chores at the same time everyday(housecleaning and errands)? What are some tips on keeping the house clean once I have cleaned it, it never seems to stay cleaned for an hour after I have just cleaned it?

Answer 1

The best thing that I can say to is relax. I am a SAHM to a 5 and 3 year old, and I could spend every minute of every day cleaning. The most important thing to do is spend quality time with your son. I spot tidy thru the day, and when they go to bed, I clean up the mess. Twice a week I go on a major cleaning spree, but I figure, what will they remember most? A sparkling house, or a mom that wasn't stressed and was there for them. Just my opinion.

Answer 2

These are all great tips, I wish I had seen them before I went crazy like you are. You really do have to find a happy medium, and like the others have said, realize that your kids are what's important right now, and that your really clean house comes much farther down on the list. It's hard, I really do know- but your son will never remember your house being dirty, unless it gets disgusting, which from the sound of your personality, that just wouldn't happen. I keep all of my daughter's toys in her room. She does drag some out, but making that the main play place keeps it managable, while she's napping, I walk around and put them all in a basket, then I set it outside her door, and when she wakes up, I bring it in and put the toys away while we play. I also keep food in the kitchen only. My daughter already knows this, and sticks to it, and it never was a problem since that was the way it always was. We totally simplified our house, too- we have no knick-knacks around, all of our pictures we used to have in frames on tables are now hung on the walls, etc.- the only thing in the living room to get messy is the throw pillows, not hard at all to toss back on the couch if someone's coming over. I also made sure my husband and I were on the same page as far as household chores- he goes to work 40 hours a week, I work at home with our daughter 40 hours a week- he's not expected to fit in a load of laundry or dishes when he's between projects at work, so why should I? We know the evenings will be busier with us each doing a chore or two while the other is playing with our daughter, but my days are for being home with our daughter, not always thinking in the back of my mind, "Oh, I should run and put a load of clothes in the wash..." you could also make a chart if you're organized, like Monday, Wednesday, Friday, do laundry, Tuesday, Thursday, get the bathroom & kitchen wiped down. Not everything has to be done every day, much less be in a constantly clean state. Once your son is in bed, try to relax & not do chores at all then. Take that time for yourself, or time with friends or husband/boyfriend... The same principle about your son being most important, not a clean house, goes for you & your other relationships, they are what will carry you through this life, not your clean house. Good Luck~

Answer 3

I uderstand your frustration! I go through the same thing at my house. I have a 14 month old little girl who gets into eveything. I also have a 5 year old son with special needs and I do daycare in my home with a 7 month old and my niece is 18 months old. Am I CRAZY! Sometimes I think so... my mornings are usually spent with the kdis. Although if i have errands to run i have found that the morning is usually best for those. They are not as tired and tend not to get to cranky while i am out. I tend to clean house while the kids are napping. They usually nap from 11:30-2:00 PM. My husband works 4 Pm to Midnight so...I tend to put the kids to bed at 8:00 PM and then spend 2-3 hours for myself, on computer, watching a movie, reading, sewing crosstich, relaxing in a bath, and then I will clean up what has not gotten clean over the course of the night. Although there are days i just don't do it! There is always tomorrow and Remember making memories with your children is what is important at the end of the day. Sometimes the house and all the endless chores and errands overwhelms me and i have to slow down STOP! and take a breather. Good Luck!
* I try to contain the kids to one section of the house so I do not have everything strung out all over the house

Answer 4

Well, I have 3 kids and stay home with my 2 youngest. I have a 2 yr. old and a 7 month old.
When the kids go down for naps, I pick up their messes.
As for the regular house chores, I have developed a schedule that helps keep me sane. I divided the entire house into 7 sections and assigned each to a day of the week. It keeps me constantly cleaning, but since it is only a little a day it is not overwhelming and the house is always clean.
It really does work!

Answer 5

I am not a stay at home mom, I have a 16 month old girl, and my house is still that way even though i'm not always home. I really don't think that there is any way to keep the house perfectly clean. Well, clean, yes, picked up, no. And unless you live with your husband or boyfriend, you'll probably not get any time to yourself. If you do, then he should at least have the decency to allow you some time to yourself while he watches the kid for an hour or two. Even if that means that you just get a nice bubble bath. Sometimes, that's all you need, sometimes you need tons more. I have found that I have only allowed a few of my daughter's toys out in the living room, the rest are kept in her room. So, at least, when I have people over, I can quickly pick up the living room and they won't see the mess in her room.....

Answer 6

...and I am sorry to say, it never will be as clean as it was before you had kids. Just as your picking up the LR and moving into the den, there they are right behind you trashing it with inncocent looks of glee(ARG) You can do a few things though, they have helped me deal with the madness.
First, lower your standards or you might go out of your mind. I dont mean live in a pit, just let the little things go. For example, how many times a day does the patio door actually need to be cleaned of finger prints? the dusting can wait until tommorow, nothing will grow there I promise(but if you had told me this in the beginning I might have cried!) Limit the # of toys you have out at any given time to ten. Ten is plenty and I have noticed more than that and they tend to get egnored in leu of the stereo cabinet, or moms purse, or hey lets try to jimmy the door and escape!(I have 2 2 yr olds.....what one won't think of the other will) Switch them out every now and again for the sake of interest. Spend time outside to give your home a break, and him something new to do.
Here are a few other things. Write up a list of what you have to get done as far as cooking and house work go. Now seperate that list into what you can reasonably get done while he is awake, without stressing him or you out, in the am. Make it say three or four things. (like laundry, loading the dishwasher)when he naps, what I do it work like madness for an hour. Whatever I get done in that hour,great, then I steal an hour for me. (ok, but sometimes, when I steal it i give it right back and wind up doing housework anyway:) after your time, if he is not yet awke do a little more. For the afternoon, same thing. Whatever is left on your list, pick 5 or 6 things to do. after bedtime, do whats left, or learn not to worry about it. Clean as you go, that helps alot. If you just made luch for you two, swipe the counters quick, and dustpan the floor so you dont have to spend time with it later.
Hope this helps!

Answer 7

I have this same problem. I have a 23 month old and a 10 month old and my house is never clean even though I constantly feel like I am always cleaning it. I have found that my house does not need to be spick and span 24 hours a day at my kids expense. I am going to always have to pick the Cheerios up off the ground I am going to have to clean the high chair off a hundred times and washing bottles is inevitable. But the books that cover the play room floor that I have already put away 10 times are just going to stay there unitl the end of the day and the toys that mkae a line from my duaghters room to the kitchen I'll just have to move over with my foot for the mean time. I drive myself crazy sometimes picking the same things up over and over that now I wait until the end of the day when I know they will be where I put them at least for a couple hours this time.

Answer 8

I done the same thing you are doing for some time. I felt like I was running in circles. Then a wise lady told me one day that my child grows one day older everyday and would soon be grown. Toys on the floor would be there tomorrow. I then stopped running behind them and cleaning every minute of every day. Instead, I cleaned the "dirty" messes as they came and left the clutter and toys until the end of the day. I also lessened the mess by putting a lot of toys away only leaving out a few and every few days rotating the toys out so they would seem new to the kids. I made sure also that food stayed in the kitchen or that I had control over what they had in their hands in the living room. I hope this is what you were talking about.

Answer 9

First of all dont go picking up after everything he gets into. The only time I picked up after my little girl was when she went down for a nap or for bedtime. I usually do chores when she is taking a nap but then again i dont completely clean up after her. I will usually keep a toy or two out that she would play with so when she gets up from her nap she will concentrate on the toys that i already have out for her to play with. You also need to teach your son what he can and cant get into or touch. That will help with the hastle of keeping your house clean for awhile. It also helps that if you are tired when you lay your son down to take a nap with him. I do this one quite often because my daughter is 18 and a half months old and gets into everything. So good luck and i hope my advice helps you in the future. Take care and take it easy too.

Answer 10

I'm a stay at home mom with a 1 year old (2 weeks ago). He is independent and gets into everything. I get up anywhere from 7-9 or so, usually 8. He wakes up as late as 9:45. I try to get the laundry out and make the bed, that kind of thing. We get breakfast, play a little with his toys, then I clean them up. We go to the park alot so we'll walk, play and have lunch there. Then he naps anywhere from 1-5. I like to have him nap 1-3, but depends on what we do during the day. While he sleeps I clean up and relax, or nap myself. Then he gets up and I make dinner. My hubby comes home, we eat and play with Christian, then he goes to bed anywhere from 8:30-10. I usually do my weekly cleaning on Mondays. This includes all of the dusting, sweeping, moping and vacuuming. It's hard to get it done when Christian's awake, so I usually do it while he's sleeping Monday afternoons. If I don't finish I will do the rest when he goes to bed or when he naps on Tuesdays. I'm a neat freak, so just clean everything when it's messed up. Of course let him play with toys, but clean up before you leave, I hate to come home to a messy house. Do the dishes after you eat because they'll get messy, just take every chance you get when the baby's distracted to keep everything clean.