Have been suffering from PTSD since late 80's Is it normal to want revenge on abusers?

Question

I have PTSD and DID. Tonight felt revenge starting towards my abusers and was quite frightened by it. Is this a normal reaction? The revenge I mean!

Just wanted to add yes have been in and out of therapy since late 80's and have just recently started remembering the abuses and getting in touch with the feelings associated with child abuse sexual and physical and teenage rape by 7 men and 2 sexually and physically abusive husbands. Some feelings are frightening as I dissociated them all during my life!

Answer 1

Since your post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) was diagnosed back in the 80's, I assume that you have sought much-needed treatment in order to cope. What did the therapist(s) advice that you do if these feelings should arise again? Perhaps, you need further counseling in order to put these feelings behind you. They are still eating away at you, huh? This is what the NATIONAL CENTER FOR PTSD had to say on the subject:
"Anger is usually a central feature of a survivor's response to trauma because it is a core component of the survival response in humans. Anger helps people cope with life's adversities by providing us with increased energy to persist in the face of obstacles. However, uncontrolled anger can lead to a continued sense of being out of control of oneself", especially for someone like you who also suffers from a dissociative identity disorder (DID), and this "can create multiple problems in the personal lives of those who suffer from PTSD." Please, seek continued therapy.

Answer 2

Its hard to objectively look inside yourself, when you're the one who's suffering (from anything, PTSD, depression, bipolar, etc.). Although I have never been the victim, a good friend of mine was sexually abused when he was younger. He is very open & honest about it, and one time when he and I were just discussing life's frustrations, he shared with me that the resulting affects of sexual abuse can influence up to 85% of the victims personality. "That means up to 85% of who I am, is from that. If that hadn't happened to me, I might be a completely different person than who I am now." he said to me. That really put into perspective the lasting affects of these crimes. I don't think you'll find anyone more qualified on here than your therapist, but if you don't feel a connection of trust with her, perhaps you should try a couple other therapists until you find the right person.

Answer 3

Im not quite sure weather you want revenge on people who are currently abusing you, or the ones that gave you post tramatic stress disorder in the first place. I would think that revenge thoughts are normal, but acting apon them may be less normal. This seems a little less orthodox than most cases i have heard of..

Answer 4

thoughts and feelings are normal, as long as you don't act on them. behavior is what gets us into trouble, not thoughts.

in fact, accepting the fact that you feel anger towards your abusers is the first step in healing. you were hurt and that's terrible. the people who hurt you were wrong, and feeling anger and revenge towards them is normal. now what? well, you can't change how people act, but you can control how you act. you can be the better person by acknowledging your feelings, accepting that you have feelings about things that happened in the past, and understanding that your current and future behaviors are your choices. you can choose to forgive your abusers too. that can be a difficult endeavor, but forgiveness is for you, not them. when you forgive, you allow God to handle those abusers, which frees you up to accept the blessings He has for your life.

good luck to you. be gentle and kind to yourself and others.

Answer 5

It's absolutely normal! However that is not a license to act on your feelings. I suffer similarly. Action seems like such a sweet course of action. I have decided that legal action, in any form is the appropriate revenge. The legal actions that I take, can have a never ending cascading effect on those who have wronged me, while leaving me farting in silk.

Answer 6

I have the same issue. Only mine has extended far beyond wanting to hurt my abuser. I literally hate ANYTHING that resembles what a "whore" is in my twisted mind, and thinking of porn, or hookers, or slutty women puts me in a rage. The idea that a man would want to see that smut puts me in a rage. I want to grab their face and be like, "YOU KNOW THESE WOMEN ARE F***** UP, BAD THINGS HAPPENED TO THEM, THAT IS WHY THEY ARE SKANKY YOU PERVERTED LITTLE S***." I have been to counceling and such, I dont think its something that ever goes away. Or maybe I just dont want to let go. Not so sure. But I do understand what you mean.

Answer 7

Yes, it is normal.

Consider a culture-wide pan-demic of PTSD from the events of the 30s and 40s on our "great generation".

Answer 8

Yep. I suffer with PTSD, and have wanted to get back at those who have caused it. I haven't done anything to them, but, I would love to sometimes. Sometimes it is so bad I scare myself. At those times I write my feelings out, which usually leads to me crying, which helps A LOT.

Answer 9

Get into counseling, hon. I've been through it too. Sometimes you need "refreshers" for PTSD counseling. Plus it'll keep you out of trouble. Good luck.

Answer 10

Normal to feel it. Not normal to act on it. I hope you are getting counseling for this! If it is still affecting you after 20 years, you need to continue to seek treatment for it. Discuss this with your doctor. Good luck!