My stepdaughter's hygiene is not that great. Several mornings I've noticed her toothbrush is bone dry, and she does not wash her face in the morning before putting on makeup, or before going to bed. She only seems to wash her face when she showers every other day, if that.
What I don't get is that she is very much into fashion and her looks. She is very girly, has nice clothes and is pretty despite her acne. She has tons of friends, is getting ready for prom, etc. But it just drives us nuts that we spent $ on braces and now her teeth are yellowish and we spent $ on Proactiv, at her request, and she no longer washes her face!
My husband and I have had full custody of her for the last few years. Our relationship with her is great, but my husband and I don't know how to go about bringing up this touchy and embarrassing subject. I've hinted by telling our 3 year old how important hygiene is, and I say it when she's around. That hasn't changed anything...Any ideas?
2007-04-25 10:09:20 · 12 answers · asked by kim.san 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
My little sis has same problem...Just tell her she is sterting to smell and you would like it if she cleaned herself... Tell her you are upset you spent so much money and she is wasting it...Higene is one of the most important things in life..you have to smell and look nice for job interviews and all that good stuff.
2007-04-25 10:21:43 · answer #1 · answered by X_Emo_Blondie_X 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a tough one because you would think she would be into brushing teeth, etc because of the dating scene and boys. She is depressed but she is not showing it outwardly but it transcends to her personal grooming.
Maybe you could send her to the dentist and surreptitiously ask him to give her advice on brushing and oral hygiene.
As frs as showering and washing her face:
If she has acne then you and her Dad should take her to a dermatologist and get it cleared up - she may be depressed about the bumps and the doctor could explain about washing the skin too.
Showering. When she goes to college her peers are going to really get on to her about her hygiene when she lived in a dorm.
2007-04-25 10:20:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all the face washing thing. I wouldn't say anything about that. If her face is still breaking out, I would stop buying the Proactiv and say, "it must not be working, if you are washing your face daily and following the directions" That way, she can either stop being lazy (sorry ) or lose something she wants.
The teeth thing is a little more touchy.
I wouldn't say anything. Maybe a girlfriend will tell her. Or you can ask her what brand is her fav toothpaste? Maybe buy that for her?
2007-04-25 10:16:57 · answer #3 · answered by Katie C 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe she doesn't like using Proactive because it has 3 steps and seems like a hassle, try to find her a cleanser/toner combined and maybe makeup that has an oil free mosturizer in it that way she has less to put on and worry about. As for teeth brushing, maybe she hates the taste of toothpaste or her teeth/gums are sensitive. buy her a toothbrush with soft brustles/fruity flavored toothpaste
2007-04-25 12:01:07 · answer #4 · answered by Shauna C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sooner or later your daughter will be 18 and whatever you do she will still do it. All you can do is sit down with her and talk to her. Tell her you know about this guy and if she really is in to him you'll support her no matter what even if you don't like this dude. Be glad she is taking birth control and she is taking good care of that. But the communication is the best thing to do if you want your daughter to trust you. I know it must be hard for you to see your baby doing this but at least you know what is going on and try to get on her head and understand what is going on. She needs you now more then ever. Please just talk to her and don't get mad because that's why teenagers don't trust their parents because the get mad so easily. Good luck and remember that it's best for you to be there for her:)
2016-05-18 21:55:57 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some teens subconsciously resist anything that makes them have to abandon the way they were as children. Puberty and the responsibilities associated with growing up bother them too much.
It's up to parents, particularly mothers, to nag them about personal hygiene.
A lot of them go through a "slob stage" when they get to college and nobody criticizes their gross habits. The neat and clean people shun them, but the grubby kids don't even notice. It may take drastic measures to shape them up. In the Navy, my husband tells me, if a certain guy gets too smelly or dirty, a bunch of others frog-march him into the showers and clean him up all over with strong soap and a stiff-bristle brush. They aren't gentle about it, either.
2016-05-02 06:00:23 · answer #6 · answered by marys.momma 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why would you pussyfoot around this?
Tell her flat out...
"Honey, you want your face to clear up? Wash it"
"Honey, you're almost an adult, and it's really important that you brush your teeth at least twice a day"
These are basic lessons that should have been ingrained in her as a child, if they haven't been...they need to be.
Stop with the subtlety...just tell her.
She may think it's OK and that no one notices...well they do!!
Personality and looks count for alot...but dog breath and greasy skin and hair does too...
She may get judged on appearance as unfair as it is...so she really should be taught to put her best foot forward.
2007-04-25 10:22:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Remember the adam sandler movie big daddy? You may just say this once so that she knows. do you want to be known as the girl in class with bad breath? Some of your friends may not tell you but you really need to brush so you are not the bad breath girl in class. Not tring to be mean but just letting you know since you take such good care of the way you dress.
2007-04-25 10:21:41 · answer #8 · answered by ronnny 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Could she be depressed? Sometimes, when people are depressed, their hygeine changes where they no longer really care about their appearance. Other than that, all you can do is mention it to her that bathing and hygeine is important and no one wants to be around someone who doesn't bath or who smells. I know that sounds harsh, but it's pretty much the truth. If she still insists on not bathing, etc...then it's her life.
2007-04-25 10:18:59 · answer #9 · answered by First Lady 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well when i was 13 and i didn't want to do anything, my mom would literally sit there in the bathroom while i took a shower and make sure that i washed my hair, and cleaned up myself (she would literally watch me IN THE shower) then when i got out she would watch me brush my teeth and watch me wash my face, and do my hair and all that every night for like 3 weeks. needless to say i was frusterated by it all that I told ok, let me take the shower on my own, then i'll open the door and you see everything i do, sure enough she watched when i would open the door, but she would also sniff my skin and smell my hair. that lasted about 2 weeks, then i was allowed to do it on my own and she would check me after i got out of the bathroom altogether. smell my hair and skin then sniff my face and mouth to make sure i did those too. that lasted about a week. then i was on my own, but my mom would still just walk in sometimes while is was in the bathroom and and make sure i was taking care of self randomly, or just check me out and sniff me randomly. so yeah, my mom told that she did it because she thought that by making feel like a kid again, i would retaliate by showing her i could do it on my own, and maintaining that by still well, as bad as it sounds, belittling me by sniffing me. so, maybe you have to play tough like that and explain to her that if she won't take of herself on her own like a young woman does, then you'll take care of her like a child. maybe you can embarass her straight. good luck
2007-04-25 10:36:49 · answer #10 · answered by PiX iE 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋