how do i know if im inlove?

Question

me and my bf been together for almost 2 years. we met online. he is 10
years older to me. in the first 3 months of our relationship, we are
already intimate until now. but during the time we are together i met
somebody actually i knew him first before my bf but we seldom see each
other because he is busy and so do i.
after a year i come to discover lots of not good attitude of my bf, he
is strict though sometimes i appreciate it because he corrects me if i
did something not good. he assist me with my decision esp. family
matters or even he is the one who make decisions. i am starting to be so
dependent on him. i felt that he see me as a child but actually im not
maybe childish in doings but i can also be mature if he would only give me
achance to show it. i don't mind it that much at first because it makes
me feel good also because he really cares for me or even help me, he is
generous he always had something for me.

along the way i feel in love
with this guy as i said earlier, he knew that i already had a bf, but we
agreed to become steady, but my problm with this guy is that he is too
shy to show his feelings to me. later i fell inlove with him and i
almost didn't know if i love my first bf or i am just being too dependent
on him. i feel happy when im with this 2nd bf but i just dont know if
feels the same way too, he said that he can't decide yet for our
relationship because i still have relationship with my first bf, i want to end
up already my relationship with my first bf but i dont want to end it
up without any assurance that this 2nd bf really loves me.
another thing, i also dont want to loose my first bf because i feel
happy with him, and i dont want to loose him and when im with him i dont
need to pretend. but i think im iblove with my 2nd bf.
please help me with my problem... help me what to do or make me realize
or know what was im doing...

Answer 1

Understand love is a symbol, its a word. Its not a good one ether its nothing more then a word thats used to sum-up all the feelings we feel for something. So in fact the way you feel about stepping on gum, is love, its a feeling. Thats what makes it so darn confusing. See your not really debating over who you love more, your debating over who you feel more for. And your lost! Very, very lost, because you have no compass of your own to tell you what your purpose in your life is. Its seems to me that bf1 has been handling this little affair for you which is why your so dependent. Now that brain of yours is telling you this isn't right, but its also telling you bf2 isn't right. Sounds like you need a break from all bf's. That way you can spend sometime being your own friend, so you can understand better what you need, not what these guys want.... time to do some growing in other words and read some books, conversate with people who you don't have sex with, and understanding your own opions, ideals, and dreams.... time to let them both go really. Neither one seems to be the best friend to themselves better yet to you, love is never enough.... so what if you feel for them? What does it do for you? Why if one makes you so happy then why is there even a debate? And understand to love is what we give ourselves, we can love many things, it doesn't make it good for us, lets just say the word love in another light could be considered addiction...