I have a mental illness schizophrenia why is it so hard to find a boyfriend?

Question

I have a mental illness and I find it hard to find a nice man. I am a very attractive lady and have a nice personility which I would like to find a man who I can share my life with.How long do I have to wait I think I have waited long ENOUGH and so tired of it. I am 32 yrs old and so sick of this illness because I think it is a barrier to find a man. I have been to places where people with mental illnesses hang out but with no luck and been on singles and dating lines for people with disabilities and no luck. I only have one friend in the world who contacts me daily without the support of her and my mum I think I would go mad,I have tried to much and find it hard to make friends so dont tell me to go places been there and done that. I am sick and so tired of life I feel there is no future for me at all what shall I do. any answeres will be appreciated thank you for listening

Answer 1

sounds like you are doing all you can. sometimes so called normal people can take a long time to find that relationship. i found mine at age 40 and have been very happy since. as u probably know there are a lot of people out there that put a stigma on people with mental illness. do not do that to yourself. if believe that if u are on medications, and your symptoms of your illness are under con troll, you are not mentally ill . you are just a person on medication, trying to find love, happiness just like anyone else, and you deserve it too. do not think that if you have a relationship it will make you more happy, it may, but it also will make you more content in your life. happiness comes from within you, and if you are happy about yourself, how you see yourself, then that attracts a person to you also. i hope this has helped you, and wish you the best of luck there is a future for you.

Answer 2

The one thing I'd never tell you is to go to a
mental facility, where you can be with some
people who share the same sort of problem
that you do.
(Uhm...wait a second, here: that is EXACTLY
what I said in the previous paragraph; well, hey,
listen. You DID NOT hear that from ME. Okay?)
But, seriously: I struggled with a silmilar disorder
for a whole 2 & 1/2 years: namely, depression.
So, I have also "been there, done that." And, if
I learned anything at all from my visit to that sort
of place, it was that the form of counselors those
sort of places employ were NOT the sort that I
needed.
It's a very common misconception that psycha-
itrists and psychologists are equals. That is NOT
true. A psychaitrist will listen to your problems,
but they won't HEAR you: they will, instead, mull
over what their favorite prescription medication
for you is --then put you on it, and a week later,
ask you if it's working out all right.
Psychologists, by contrast, will listen to you AND
hear you out--so they can work with you to decide
what you can do for yourself, to ease whatever
troubles your condition's symptoms' might be
giving you.
The best thing you can do for yourself, while you
are still relatively young--and I am a guy who is
18 years older than you--is find a friend who'll
pay attention to your troubles. (A friend to get
really know, and truly love, is secondary right
now.)
There are many wonderful meds out there that
might help to minimize your Schizophrenia's
symptoms. But medication is NOT "the ultimate
answer," and never has been.
Besides, contrary to a popular old saying, talk
is not "cheap." (And, of course, that is also all
TOO TRUE of prescription medications!)
So, to review:
Step #1: Let your fingers to some walking thru
your local Yellow Pages.
Step #2: Learn to live with your condition. It is
only by learning to live with it that you'll ever be
able to overcome it.
Step #3: Think positive--and, while you are at
that, put psychaitrists as far out of your mind as
possible.
(They are psychologists in wolves' clothing!)

Best of health & good luck.

Answer 3

I know how you feel. I have schizo-affective disorder. It can be very hard to meet people or to get involved with someone. You do have a future. Please don't give up. Personally I have a hard time connecting to people. But once I do it's a little easier. Things will get better. It just takes time. I know you're probably tired of hearing that, but it is true. It takes a special kind of person to be with someone with a mental illness. A lot of people are scared of us. They hear the words mentally ill and run for the hills. Which is actually good. Why? Because people who will bail are not needed. Tell you what. If you would like you can e-mail me. Just look at my profile. My e-mail is available.

Answer 4

I know a woman who has this same disorder and she has been married for almost 10 years. Its not just you. You have to find better than a nice man. You have to find a man that is very mature and knows what hes dealing with. The man that's married to the gal I mentioned is super cool and besides there is medication and other forms of therapy that you can pursue to assist you in leading a normal life! The gal I wrote about in this answer is really cool and you would never know unless she told you. You have more to offer a man than you realize and the right one will present himself to you. Cheer up!
As a matter of fact you may already know this individual and you just haven't clicked yet! Stay strong there is more to life than having a boy friend. Sometimes significant others bring about too much change that you may not be prepared to handle so take your time and it will happen.

Answer 5

some times men are scared of what they don't know. don't worry there are a lot of men that do understand and will love you for who you are. one thing is that you are a strong person who accepts and treats her illness and that is great and still that can be threatning to the wrong guys. just go out and have fun and make friends. you will do just great. my mother used to say "don't go out looking for a husband just find someone who you enjoy spending time with. if it works into something more than great, if not then at least you made a new friend" i always took that to heart and i have severe depression with severe anxiety and i found a husband. believe me it will happen when you least expect it. it always does. hope this helps

Answer 6

a hard question. Maybe if your did not open up too much and tell them that you have schizaphrenia, you might be surprised at how many really do like you.

Many people suffer schizophrenia, and because the person who doesn't will hear you do, they panic, are scared, they have watched too many Hollywood movies and don't really understand what it is.

People (in general) are afraid of somethings they don't understand.

Stand tall and proud, you will find someone, who loves you for you not your disorder.

Answer 7

Listen to yourself. Part of many individuals problems is that they feel that they NEED somebody to love them to be happy. There are so many things that you could be doing and enjoying yourself to the fullest but what are you doing? You are feeling lonely and letting that over-ride your life. I did the same until I realized that I would be without a boyfriend or husband. You have such great qualities, use them. Volunteering for children's organizations or any organizations/ institutions will give you greater satisfaction than a boyfriend. Think, you do not have to worry about phone calls, how you act, picking up after anyone, and the list goes on. My five siblings are reaching retirement and they have to spend 24/7 with spouses. Who is blessed? We all are it is just how we use our blessings. Please keep taking your meds. Many who I have known with your disease do not take the meds as they need and end up having so many problems.

Answer 8

Is your schizophrenia under control? Do you tell people of your illness right off the bat? Do you have to warn them for their safety and yours? Usually on first dates most successful people that date don't reveal any bagage. Also mental illness has a stigma, especially because of things like Virgina Tech, he had schizophrenia. My best friend for 15 years didn't tell me she was bi-polar. I thought she was just being mean when she had an episode. I wish she did tell me, but i would have been scared if she told me in the beginning of the friendship.

Answer 9

Don't give up. To be truthful it seems like hardly anyone finds a true match. Always know you are wonderful and you deserve someone who loves you for who you are. I wish I could help you more but... You just have to wait for that true love.

Maybe you could take up some kind of social hobby where you might meet guys? I don't know. Good luck, and don't ever compromise.

Answer 10

Don't let your illness get in the way of your life. there are pleanty of alternatives as to getting treatment. (psychotherapy) aka talk therapy for the doctor to better know your symptoms and mind chemistry and also there are treatments to help you be stabilized. and mainly: don't go looking for men. (my sister does this all the times and winds up confused, used and depressed) you sit back and let them come to you then you be the one to deside as to which one is good enough for you and set your standerds to at least a decent respectable level. remember you cannot cange anybody.