I have been in a relationship for 5 years and a couple of months ago he decided that we should be friends. We still see each other and are somewhat living together, he doesn't want to be bf/gf and he has told me so but he also doesn't want me to leave and tells me that he still loves me. He also doesn't want me seeing other guys and he isn't seeing other girls, but he reminds me every so often that we are not together. When I ask him he tells me that I have to give it time and that soon I will know what the verdict is. It has been 6 months. What now?
2007-04-24 08:40:43 · 9 answers · asked by sweet_hotty411 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Give him and yourself a timetable (2 months, 6 months, whatever works) that he can figure out what he wants to do. If he hasn't figured it out by then, have a plan to get out on your own or find a new roommate.
If a man truly loves you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't, nothing can make him stay. He will only take advantage of your relationship for as long as you allow him to!
2007-04-24 08:46:27 · answer #1 · answered by Amy 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Honestly it sounds like he is keeping you around till he finds someone else. Then he will leave and you will be left alone. Not that there is anything wrong with being alone sometimes it is necessary. I think it would be best if you two went your seperate ways for a while and if months or a year down the road you end up back together then great and if not that will also be great cause then you will find someone else. If he doesn't know what he wants do you really want to waste your time waiting around you could be missing out in life. My husband and I were like that. He was not ready to grow up so we split up for 9 mths. and went our seperate ways and then got back together and we had both done some changing. Now that might not happen with you two but PLEASE do not let him make your choices or decide what happens in your life nobody should do that especially of the opposite sex. Good Luck!
P.S. Haven't you wasted enough time already!
2007-04-24 08:53:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
As I am not in tune with what your relationship was like before, I'd guess he is dragging you along. It does seem he is trying to keep this a relationship of convenience for him. My guess is that 1) he is petrified of a relationship but doesn't know how to tell you, 2) there is another girl out there you haven't found out about yet, 3) he isn't sure if you are the one and is testing your waters to make sure that you are it. Six months is a long time to test you out (and to be honest, he should alreasy know since you two are still together). Since you say that neither are dating, but he demands that you not bring other guys over - it seems fishy. I am leaning to the scared about the relationship - so he is draggin you along until he figures it out. A sure tell way is to mention that you met a really nice girl that you want him to meet - if he is up for it, he has been dragging you along (just say that she got transferred/ quit), but if he says no and states something about you are the only one for me - he has cold feet. If you like the guy - tell him to get his butt in gear, if not - drop him!
2007-04-24 08:58:32 · answer #3 · answered by bonsai67 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this may not be what you want to hear, but if you two have been seeing each other for 5 years and he hasn't put a ring on your finger by now, then it isn't going to happen. You are now wasting your time with this guy. Does he want to be with your or does he? He wants to be friends, but doesn't want you to date anyone else? Do you see what is wrong with this picture?
You need to give him that ultimatum. I mean right now. You got to think about your future. If he isn't willing to spend a lifetime with you, then you need to cut your losses and split. Life is too short to wait for someone to decide after 5 years whether or not they want a long-term relationship or not.
Another thing. Feel free to date other guys. Why should you or he care? After all, you are only friends right?
2007-04-24 08:50:17 · answer #4 · answered by davester1970 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
long distance relationships are exceedingly complicated - for this reason. To be honest, i think of you will desire to cut back him loose and make it everlasting without greater touch, you will recover from it. It doesnt sound such as you're happy and neither is he so why proceed not to point make plans. What approximately your destiny? perhaps you will desire to get faraway from this and think of aboiut who you desire to be with. Does this guy have plans with you to get married or something or does he experience you're content textile to waste your life wiating around for him? The message your sending is that your guy or woman life skill not something. you may desire to think of that with the aid of, why is that he's all that concerns/ IS there a futer with him or not. Ask him element sparkling and if not end it and flow on. Sorry what's it you elect from him? He calss you each and every and every day to permit you understand he loves you and he has devoted to marrying you inj 2 years. What precisely else do you elect from him? perhaps you will desire to coach him you adore him instead of demanding abotu what hes doing? Do you call him each and every 2d day and tell him you adore him too and which you cant wait till ultimately he comes living house and which you're doing some thing yourslef too? Do you have a pastime or some thing?
2016-12-10 10:22:35 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
live today as you never want to take anything back its cliche but its important as hell ask him and get either a definite answer or not if its not then dint make any excuses for him and stop lying to yourself you need to be brave enuf to go on and leave nothing behind if you leave he might realize his beating around the bush is hurting someone other than himself and he will aether not come back or he will sort himself out and come back with a ring don't settle for anything in between you don't want to waste tomorrow wandering what yesterday couldve been
2007-04-24 08:54:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
run, run, run for the hills. This guy wants to have his cake and eat it too. I say this from personal experience. I was in a relationship almost identical to yours. We broke up a little over 2 years ago (for good) and I have since met the MOST amazing man ever. We are getting married in August!
You fail to realize-while in this 'relationship' that you deserve so much more and SO much more is out there! RUN!
2007-04-24 08:48:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
He is not acting normal! If he really loves you tell him to explain his actions and he will .
If not move on because you and I know U can do better and life goes on.
Best wishes
2007-04-24 08:54:03 · answer #8 · answered by B-Dragon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he really wanted to be with you he wouldn't tell you that he doesn't want to be with you.
Sit him down and ask him what he wants. You can't keep waiting for him.
2007-04-24 08:46:55 · answer #9 · answered by Virginia 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋