It has been 16 years since I'v seen my father and his family and Sunday my step-sister contacted me through myspace but then shut the door right back in my face. I have always wondered about my father but never planned on finding him until she made contact with me. Now that she opened the door, I want to knock it down. Thanks to a friend, I now have his information and even though my step-sister has asked me not to contact him, I feel that I need to try because I don't want to be the one with regrets in the end. I have his home address but it's the same as his business address so I don't know what the best way to contact him is to be sure I talk to him and not his wife. Any suggesstions? Also, the business is Pioneer Builders in Independence Virginia, if anyone knows any information about this company it would be appreciated. I need all the help I can get here. Thanks in advance.
2007-04-24 02:09:15 · 12 answers · asked by purpleama456 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Thank you for the address but I already had that which is the same address that I have for his home. I'm looking for more details whether it's regarding the company in general, anybody that has had any first hand experience with the company, a second phone number they may have, etc. Anything that would be of help
2007-04-24 02:35:47 · update #1
A website for the business would be of help but I can't seem to find one
2007-04-24 02:36:57 · update #2
In case anyone is wondering, I'm 24 and last saw my dad when I was 8
2007-04-24 04:00:04 · update #3
I want to thank everyone who has answered so far. As far as getting my feelings hurt, I expect I will. I don't expect he'll welcome me in his life at all, however, at least at the end of my life journey I won't be the one regretting the fact that I didn't try. Regarding whether or not anyone on his side has tried to make contact with me, no, not directly, but my step-sister knew I had two kids when she made contact with me and said she found out through her mom which leads me to believe that someone on his side has been keeping track of me all these years, otherwise they would have no reason to know.
2007-05-02 00:25:11 · update #4
Sweetie you have every right to contact ur father... Speaking from my personal experience I had to contact my childrens father by calling his business number and asked for an estimate... Every attempt in the past to call his house was only met with a "He's not here" his new girlfriend never gave him the message...Finally he met his children under the pretense that he was giving us an estimate ( we got smart and used fake names) only until he met his children... Good luck sweetie and don't let anything stop you from reconnecting with ur father...
2007-04-30 19:07:35 · answer #1 · answered by RACHAEL F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forget the step-sister's request that you not contact your father. He is YOUR father too. I would send a certified letter to him at his place of business. It's something that he must sign for and you know that he received it.
All you need to say in the short letter is that you are his daughter (give other identifying information to verify this to him - such as where it was that you last saw him, who your mother is, what you knew about him before, etc.)
Say that you feel a void in your life from not knowing him and you wish there could be some contact, however small. Tell him that you are open to any carefully considered response he makes to your letter. We only get one life and you don't want to live with regrets from not having tried to contact him.
Then the ball is in his court. Don't expect much. Have your address included in the letter. He now will have the time to consider what you have done trying to reach him and what he wants to do in response. You've done your bit. If he doesn't follow through contacting you, try not to take it personally (he still doesn't know you) but you know you will have made the attempt. You can't force someone back into your life.
Good luck!
2007-04-28 12:38:38 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a very similar situation, but, I never got to meet my biological father at all. He died, before I was old enough to realize that he WAS. Now, I know that he had 2 sons, and I know their addresses. I know that I look so much like one son that out of state people stop, stare, and tell me how much I look like this man! Strange. I checked on what the sons do for a living, and found that their interests are exactly as mine......same type careers, jobs, etc.. Still, I fear upsetting anyone's applecart, since the sons have no idea that I am their half sister. Be careful about contacting people. Seriously, I worry that I will do harm, instead of good. People change, and with this change, comes new families. I am not saying that you don't have the right to speak to your own father, I am only saying that it is kinder to walk very carefully, when approaching such a monumental 'change' in anyone's life.
2007-04-24 10:44:01 · answer #3 · answered by laurel g 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i tell you what i would do. i would just jump right in and go see him. you could do this when he is getting off work. the sister was only trying to hurt you if the did that to you. your father has no feelings so please do plan on getting hurt. but again he is your father and you do not know why he left of stopped seeing you. sometimes mom's stops all contact and you never know why.
do you have children of your own? if so, that would be another reason to why you should contact him. they have a right to know their grandfather.
or again, youcould set back and wait for him to die and then ask yourself why you didn't try to contact him and let him be your father for once in your life. how do you know he doesn't want to see you.
remember, everyday he is getting older and who nows when the good LORD plans on taking him home. then you will never get to know him.
maybe there is something wrong and that is why his other family has tryied to contact you. maybe they are waiting until you make the next move.
but you did put his address on here. how do you know someone hasn't tryued to contact him for you by now.
don't be afraid !!! jump, girl, jump.
how could you be hurt any more.
just be easy on him, until you know the rest of the story.
judy
2007-05-02 01:26:44 · answer #4 · answered by judy s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to find your father, I myself am in a similar situation. There are many ways to go about it. When you call if a woman answers make up a story, You work for such and such company and need to talk to______. Or better yet, go there! If you have the means to get there do it! People can hang teh phone up but it's alittle more difficult in person. Even if you're mad don't be threatening, be humble and polite. Yes he walked away from his responsiblities but you have to be the bigger person and stay calm. Good luck! Hope everything works out for you!
2007-04-24 09:27:28 · answer #5 · answered by vballmilyssa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definately ignore that wicked step-sister. This reunion is something you want, and if you feel so strongly about it, I would definately do it. Perhaps a registered heart-felt letter? Then you will have a return card that it was received. I think I would be way too nervous make contact in person. Well, good luck with this, and I hope you get the reception from him that you want.
2007-05-01 02:04:32 · answer #6 · answered by julielove327 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me like the step-sister is just trying to be spitefull. acting like a spoiled child. like i got the daddy, and you dont nah nah. i would write or call your dad. if somebody else answers, and say he is busy at the moment and wants to take a message, just tell that person you are calling about a bussiness matter, and is there a better time you could call back. dont even leave your name. after all, he is your father 2. if you get ahold of him, then you will find out if he wants any thing to do with you. if not, then let it go. if he does, then thats good. either way, you will get the truth. go for it.
2007-05-01 14:03:44 · answer #7 · answered by NONAME 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pioneer Builders of America
777 Little Fox Creek Rd.
Independence, VA
Phone: (276) 579-3133
Good luck.
2007-04-24 09:33:16 · answer #8 · answered by Java Chip 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Life is short.......You should try to get in contact with your father........
I would call his business and leave my name and number as if I were a customer (don't give real name) and then when he calls you tell him the deal......That is the only way you can bypass the wife.......
2007-04-29 23:16:14 · answer #9 · answered by PRETTY N PINK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
contact him and dont give two craps on weather or not his other daughter, or his wife get upset. HE IS YOUR FATHER TOO!! And why hasnt he been in your life? I hope he at least paid child support or something. man the dead beats these days...............
2007-04-24 09:14:16 · answer #10 · answered by vbolden88 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋