Are guys usually like this?

Question

Whenever I have a conversation with a guy, I tend to talk a lot more than he does. He asks questions about myself and I just run with it, often spinning them into long anecdotes. However, whenever I try and be polite and ask them questions about themselves, they don't seem eager to talk and direct the conversation back at me. It isn't that I mind but I'm afraid of being rude or off-putting. Am I such a brilliant conversationalist that they want me to keep talking or are they uncomfortable or offended by me asking questions, though it's not usually anything offensive, but rather what his sister does for a living or whether he played Red Rover growing up. Am I making some mistake that I'm not even aware of?

These are really just guy friends

Answer 1

Some guys are like that. If he seems to like listening to you and letting you do the talking then go ahead and do it. He may just still be warming up to you.

Just make sure that you have a break in between your stories so if he has something to add he can.

Answer 2

This is one place where opposites attract, and the younger you are the more this is probably true. Most people prefer to talk or to listen. Listeners are attracted to talkers, especially if they are socially awkward. Talkers are attracted to listeners because they need an audience. So I expect your sample is more reserved than the average male population.

As for mistakes, you've dropped some hints that you could be making some. A "long anecdote" is pretty risky unless you're a skilled storyteller or the guy is infatuated with you. Even quiet types will generally prefer you get to the point fairly quickly.

And I'm afraid your example of asking about Red Rover is not a great conversation-starter, unless you have some follow-up about how it reflects their early years or something. It strikes me as the kind of question that shows superficial interest in someone instead of really wanting to get to know the person. I think a more interesting question would be more generally about what it was like for this guy growing up.

Good luck,
Houyhnhnm

Answer 3

Nothing wrong with talking!, plain an simple, when you decide you have found the right one in your life, i would make sure he is has a gd listener, and a talker has you, haveing conversation is great being good at it is a must. Age tends to start the gravity thing all over both female and male parts. at age 50 your not the women you were at 20, nor 60 .70, 80...and beyond eventually are body's can't do what once they did, but has long has you have good communacation your life will be full from now till well forever, just remember it is has important to talk as to listen!

Answer 4

Same happens to me.. it always seems like i am the only one talking and annoying the guy! Well what i found out is that mostly guys that are not really interesed in you will prefer to have a light conversation with some kind of bimbo that will laugh every 5 seconds for no reason at all and won´t mind asking personal questions so if you realize that this guy is really not into knowing more from you then just move on unless you want a quickie with him, then act like a bimbo...

Answer 5

Most of the guys don't like to talk like the girls do, but they are eager to listen to u. So don't worry u r not doing a mistake. If u want boys to talk then be friendly and talk about their interests, they will do talk but a little more than always. Though some guys talk a lot, even more then girls do, but they r minority.
In short - you are not wrong , don't panic.

Answer 6

No you're not making a mistake, you're just a chatter box and most guys aren't. We like to listen, it's so much easier than talking and girls seem to like it better when they do all the talking.

It's not that your bugging him, he just likes listening and asking questions, like most guys.

But if you really want more conversation rather than you rambling on like a broken tape recorder, then try to figure out what might really grab his attention. Not necessarily sports, music, movies, etc. but something that you would be able to tell that would get his attention engaged on you.

Answer 7

No, not all guys are like that. it depends on who you are dating/ friends with! some guys like to listen while you talk so they know what they are getting themselfs into by a manner of speaking. when they know what you like and what you dont like it makes it easier to strike up a conversation without them saying the wrong thing or avending you. for example if you say you hate people that wear real fur he would know not to mention jennifer lopez's stunning new clothes line etc.
other guys are more to the point and would answer or add to anything you say, adding things they did or didnt do directed as answers at what your saying. i think it just depends on personality. i wouldnt worry about it if i was you. i think you will get into a conversation with bothes types and then you will learn how to handle each when the date or conversation happens!

Answer 8

Nope were stupid like that... we figure that if we don't talk we cant screw it up... for instance i often find myself talking when i should be quiet i personally suffer for the opposite... But no nothings wrong with you he likely had someone tell him that's how he should go about on a date or what ever you forum for discussion is. basically its let her do all the talking it will make you seem really interested in her, now he could genuinely be and just be a bad speaker but my best guess in the former. Don't blame him its just bad programming.

Answer 9

Hi there, I don't want to be mean, but if he liked you a lot, he would want to open up to you. Just sounds like an immature jerk who got shoddy advice somewhere that if you let women keep talking, they will think you are interested in them and put out at the end of the date.

Answer 10

No, I think you have just met guys who don't seem to talk a lot. I think you should try to just redirect the conversation back, if they ask you questions then ask the same one back. If you are telling a story, then ask them if anything similar has ever happened to them.