I am being bullied in school. does anybody have any advice for a 14 year old?

Question

This has been going on for years now. I have been sent to all karate places. But i dont want to fight people that really annoy me. And i feel bad for my mom and dad because them always worrying about me in school. And i love karate and stuff and i am excellent in there. my teacher even saisd so. But even the most annoying person i cant seem to beat up. I think about beating them up, and i want to. but than all of a sudden i dont want to anymore. It is not out of fear trust me i am a big guy. Can someone please help me?!

Answer 1

Try your best to ignore the losers.

Answer 2

Isn't a big part of karate that you only use it as a weapon when you absolutely must? So then you are right to not want to beat someone up unless you are given no other option.

I think that you should really tell someone. Maybe you don't feel that you can tell your parents. That's okay. Is there a teacher that you have a strong connection to? Is there a counselor at your school that you could talk to? What about the principal? Your family physician? Your karate teacher? Find someone that you feel you can talk to, and tell them what is going on. You need to get this off your chest, and you need to have other people know what kind of rotten punks are treating you so badly.

I'm so sorry that you are having such a tough time. You will get through it though. High school is so silly. Once you graduate, you will move on to other things and you won't even care about this stuff anymore. It's such a hassle for you now, but it won't always be that way! Trust me :-)

Answer 3

I had the same issues at your age - the hard part is to realize that the reason people pick on you is not mainly your size looks etc . It is because you repond to them and this feeds their uncool need to feel like they are in charge or that they are superior to you some how.It also lets them show off their smart *** mouths lol

As a freshman it was so hard to go to PE because I was always picked last and was alwasy picked on- I was always being annoyed with questions like- so have you had your a@# f$%^^$$ yet? everyone is doing it- One day they stole my shoes and played keep away etc and i lost it - i was yelling and screaming and crying and threatening, biting throwing things , hitting guy in the nuts with a shoe( it did feel good but was stupid) etc etc.

Later I realized that I was making the situation worse everytime I responded to their bullying and taunting. I was teaching them that they could pick on me and get me angry and make me lose my temper, while they all had a good laugh and fun would be had by all. Every day was a challenge to see if they could get me mad.

Yes it was not fair - but I decided I had to take responsibility for my reactions and grow up and not react- by the time I was a sopohmore, things were better and by the time I was junior I was one of the normal guys.

So remember choose how you respond- do not over react or try too hard to fit in just because you think copying them will make them stop bullying you - it is all about not letting them provoke you in any way at all -when they get no reaction then after a while they will move on to others or bug you less and less.

Of course if they are beating the crap out of you physically and they start it- it might be good thing just once to win a fight to prove to your self that you can take care of yourself.
hope this helps!

Answer 4

r u a guy or girl? (just a question) it seems that u dont want to fight becuase no matter how mean some people are in this world u just 2 nice of a person to firght. what i would suggest is
leave the person alon
cold should
talk to the counsler
tell them to stop
ask why u do this
is bothering me make u happy or what
just stare then what ever they say say it back to them then leav
ignor
thats about all i can think of but if u had guts u would talk and say why u bully me and are u happy when u do it or what but u would be shy i think thats why ur here but really u have to toughen up and live with it its just the part when u hear life isnt always fair


also u seem like a nice person keepit up (blink lol)

Answer 5

The "bullying" may actually be someone trying to test you since your size is big ...... foolish enough to want to know what your real strength is.

The funny thing is tho - you have already shown real strength but they just do not get it.....resistance to foolish actions/violence...
karate training means your hands are a legal weapon, so for you to use any of those procedures could be chargeable by law.

Strength is also found in number - make a sizable number of friends - three is good.
You stand by your friends and your friends will stand by you.

Sometimes you just have to consider the source.

But actually now more than ever, if someone attacks you regardless of the level - it is assault.
You need to report to your parents, the school and the authorities of the prior attack(s) and the person(s) involved.
For once they see this will not be tolerated - the message should be clearer.

If not - learn to step up to at least one punch(for good measure).

Best wishes and STAND STRONG!!!mentally and as needed physically!!

Answer 6

well please don't take out a gun and shoot 32 people like this Cho person did. That's great that you are in karate and that you have something you can feel good about and are good at. I know you don't want to think about beating people up, but your martial art is there for self defense and you shouldn't feel guilty for using it if necessary. In Tae Kwon Do we are taught that it is more honorable to walk away but if cornered, you must fight to defend your honor and the art. Find an adult to talk to. My son's school counselor told him to give her the names of all the kids who were bullying him and she was going to talk to the parents and assure them that if their child did not stop, they would be charged with harrassment and or assault. The bullying stopped. Most schools nowadays are taking bullying very seriously and will press charges against the children and their parents, sending the children to counseling and juvenile court for assault. I'm not saying every school does that, but my son's does, you might want to see what the policies are at your school.

Answer 7

Ok kid, listen up. You don't have to beat up the town bully to get him to stop. You have to publicly embarrass him, then defend yourself. Make him look like the idiot he is then when he tries to hit you or what ever he does, defend yourself. Most bullies are affraid of having to actually account for their "abilities" in the arena, and most have never even had lessons on fighting. If you are as good at karate as you say, then you know karate isn't about beating someone up, it's about defending yourself. You don't have beat him up, you just have to stop him from beating you up. Trust me, I've been there, done that. He'll stop once he realizes he can't win with you, and you don't have to win either, just defend yourself.

Answer 8

It is hard to deal with at times, but kudos to you for not trying to beat the person up. It doesn't solve anything and it might cause more violence from the bully. Most bullys have low self esteem and bully others to make up for it. Talk to the school Principal as most schools have a zero tolerance for violence now with all the shootings in schools.If the principal can't or won't help, talk to the police. By telling someone you can get the bullying to stop and get that person the help they need.Just know your not alone! There are people that can help you.

Answer 9

generally, if you are a "big guy", it seems that you would not be bullied as much as a smaller guy. have you confronted the bullies and asked them why they have so much interest in you? and in my experience, if you ignore them, they will eventually lose inerest if you are not responding to them. usually, bullies only bully if they are getting a rise out of the person they are bullying. and just because you can beat someone up, doesn't mean you should. you will probably be the one to get in trouble. my son is the smallest in his class, the bigger kids including girls seem to get a kick out of teasing him, and the more he responds, the more they tease. finally, one of the kids that was teasing and had been getting physical with him hit him, and my son beat the crap out of him (his dad taught him to fight). now, no one picks on him anymore. they all thought because he was small, he wouln't win. gave the other kid a black eye and made him cry. but, they both got suspended for three days, even though the other kid started it. so, even though they don't tease him, he still got in trouble for defending himself. it will all work out in time, you will see.

Answer 10

true sign of a mature young man.aggression will not stop the bullies,it may not work but can you force yourself to completely ignore them?they are only doing it for the reaction, also because bullies typically have a low self esteem in their mind by putting someone else down it makes them feel better about themselves.I know that at 14 the type of bullying that can go on is not always without physical violence,however you are maintaining you cool-good anger management-if it helps at all know that their the ones who will wind up in a menial job.stand up be proud good luck

Answer 11

Can you change schools? Move? If this were happening to my son, I would do whatever it took to make him feel safe. Maybe you should talk to a counselor, these things can really affect your education and feeling of self worth-and you don't deserve that. The only thing I can tell you is what my dad told me and it's true "the people who are being called nerds and geeks are the people you will be calling BOSS in the future". Keep being the good id you are, I know they are your peers, but they really don't know anything. Make sure you never believe what they say!!!!!