My BF dumps me because he can't see us long term..even if he loves me now...then he calls the next morning and we have got together a few times since and he doesn't want to talk about it...biut he took me out to the place we went on our first date, coinstantly tells me how much he loves me and asks me over for a romatic dinner he wants to cook me...
what the h is he thinking?
I would love to keep our relationship just as it was but now I am questioning everything. Does he feel guilty? Did he change his mind?
I'm not looking for the long term commitment that seemed to scare him away. I just want to enjoy things right now.
2007-04-23 13:42:58 · 10 answers · asked by Sandra C 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just a note..we are both in our late 30's with 6 children from our marriages....we are not kids. We both have only had a couple serious relationships.
He doesn't want to go through anohter 10 years of child raising...(my kids are much younger than his) but I don't need someone to raise them. i just want someone there for me right now.
2007-04-23 13:55:44 · update #1
He sounds crazy to me-- or like someone who enjoys playing games with you. I'm surprised you call this BS "love".
2007-04-23 13:46:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's afraid of commitment. Plain and simple. Even if you don't want one or are not trying to push one on him, that's never how people like that see it.
Most likely, he just wants to enjoy things now as well. I would try and say that to him in a way that doesn't seem pushy or anything. Commitment -phobes always see things in the sense that they're getting smothered or bombarded. I wouldn't sweat it, it sounds like it's a label thing. He probably feels tied down being a 'boyfriend' to someone. You can still have the same relationship without actually labeling each other as boyfriend and girlfriend. I'm sort of like that, so I really hope I helped!
Good Luck! I'm sure everything will turn out fine. :)
2007-04-23 20:51:24 · answer #2 · answered by Kate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy obviously does not know what he wants. Use reverse physcology: When he calls and asks you out, get busy, your hair, already have plans. Say "that sounds great but I have a previous commitment"
Don't put to much time effort or energy into this though, he's playing the field and wants to be available, when he's alone he'll call his ole' stand by.
Tell him "What's UP!! Talk to him straight, at this point you don't have anything to lose except wasted time!!
2007-04-23 20:54:44 · answer #3 · answered by dimensionsdev 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What made him think long term. Personally I would tell him to stop being a fortune teller and live for the now. A bit of foward planing is alright but seriously.
He isnt grown up yet, he has no idea what his future holds so how the hell can he plan for it.
Tell him to get real!
2007-04-23 20:53:19 · answer #4 · answered by ChAtMaN 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him ask him why the 180 all of the sudden why is he interested in you again when he wanted to leave before that way the doubts can go away and you can be on the same page
2007-04-23 20:46:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U have to talk it out with me regardless of the fact whether he wants or not..
Tell him u cant wear your heart on your sleeve any farther...
Be gentle and friendly with him...so that he doesnt retaliate or feel threatened.Try to make him understand how painful and confusing things r for u the way it's been going on.
Perhaps he is just confused.
Good luck
2007-04-23 20:47:24 · answer #6 · answered by Beautiful 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He feels guilty because he was an idiot for letting you go. He didn't really change his mind, he probably just realized how stupid he was when he did what he did.
Take it one step at a time, he'll earn your trust again, and show you he's committed to you.
2007-04-23 20:49:14 · answer #7 · answered by Ch4plain 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He does not want to talk about it cause he was with someone else. But he wants to keep you in case it does not work out with the other chick.
2007-04-23 20:48:10 · answer #8 · answered by Shirley D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont go back. he's nuts
2007-04-23 20:47:17 · answer #9 · answered by Ida 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK
2007-04-23 20:46:16 · answer #10 · answered by Tiffany 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋