This question is mainly for men who have experienced this, but I'm open to women responding because I know they have some valuable input. I believe that a child that is ridiculously attatched to their mother will drive a man away just as fast as a hell-raiser child. This is not about being jealous of the child, but I do believe there is a such thing as being too attached. At what age is it no-longer acceptable to be a mama's girl (boy)? What are the general stereotypes of mama's girls? (It's easy to get info on mama's boys.) How do kids end up being ridiculously attached to parents? Your answers are greatly appreciated.
2007-04-23 08:48:53 · 14 answers · asked by Thomas S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Both a hellian and a mama's boy/girl can make your life pretty miserable, in two different ways. Both indicate that something went not quite right in their emotional development. You can deal equally successfully with either and actually help the cild to become more balanced as long as their mom realizes there is a problem. If their mom is overprotective you'll feel powerless to do anything about it.
2007-04-23 09:00:35 · answer #1 · answered by Snowflake 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Mama's girls are a rarity at an older age. Most moms and daughters become adversary's by their early teens.
Hellions are not a big deal if the mother is willing to raise them correctly. However if she is the cause of the problem, then they are the worse.
Mama's boys are the easiest, as they can quickly taught the correct method of being a man.
Fact is men are not jealous of a woman's children, the children are jealous of the man.
2007-04-23 08:57:58 · answer #2 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The attachment part is easy, your in the picture because there dad is not there most likely so his part goes to the mom for lack of better words. A mama's boy is better all you have to do is get him to accept you whereas a hellian is just gonna be bad all the time. You just have to put just about as much effort into winning him over as the special lil lady, if you can do something with him solo like play catch or basketball - whatever he likes to do. After he's on your side the worrst parts over :-) have fun with that
2007-04-23 09:08:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm neither a mother or a father... but I'm the daughter who came from a divorced family. First of all, I think its rude you're making the kids out to be the bad guys. A lot of kids deal w/ seperation anxiety as a result of divorce. I know I went through it when I was younger. I wanted to sleep w/ my mom, go with her everywhere, called her all the time, cried when she would leave. It's really hard on kids when a parent starts dating. You already feel vulnerable and abandoned... then to have you're parent start focusing more on some stranger they're dating is hard. But to be more specific and answer your question... I would say neither. I would say a adult child is worse. My mom is barely 17 years older then me. I remember her dating when I was 18 and she was 35... it was awkward. Because if she brought someone home... I knew... I knew what was going on. With younger kids... they don't get it. Plus... after the dates.. my mom told me everything. So next time I saw the guy... I'd laugh and they wouldn't know why. Or I'd bring up little things she told me in conversation that would make them embarrassed. So yea... dating anyone with kids is going to be a chore... unless you have kids. But by your attitude... I'm guessing you don't.
Either way... just try to be understanding of the children and their relationship w/ the parent. Especially if its a recent divorce.
2007-04-23 09:00:55 · answer #4 · answered by perkyash2005 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ill field this one....First of all, you dont know the situation. Maybe the child was very close to his/her father and now resents someone "replacing" them. Could be its just been Mom and child for a very long time and hes sorta resumed the role of "dad" around the house. Could be Moms really overprotective because of the lack of Dad (maybe feels guilty?) and isnt ready to cut the umbilical cord. Dating after a breakup or after the childs grown enough to have his or her own opinion of things is a gradual thing. Maybe Mom hasnt taken the time to talk to her kids about how she too needs some attention and love from another grown up. Or it could be a case of the daughter being overprotective because she distrusts men in general. Seems like the logical thing to do is for Mom to have a heart to heart with daughter and explain some things about relationships and the needs of Mom. And it wouldnt hurt for Mom to discuss selfishness either.
2007-05-01 06:17:31 · answer #5 · answered by Debbie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a single mother's point of view... before I met my ex husband my kids and I were all pretty close. We had snuggle time - like when watching tv. It's a pretty neat site when all 3 of your boys are crowded around you on the couch to snuggle and watch tv. My husband thought I should only snuggle with him. I will never allow this too happen again.
If you find a woman who's kids still have an attatchment then consider yourself lucky. A woman who will put her kids first is a loving and caring woman who will find time to show you the same love and care but don't try to interfere with what she has established with her kids. If you feel you need to then this is more your problem than the kids'
2007-04-23 08:58:32 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A bad kid is worse because you always are distracted by whatever trouble they are currently getting into. A mama's girl likes to be around her Mom all the time and never wants to share her. If you honestly think that that's a bad thing, then you obviously don't have kids. Would you rather she had a daughter who hated her? That would really say something about her, now wouldn't it! My advice, if you don't want to deal with kids, date someone who doesn't have any!!
2007-04-23 09:04:13 · answer #7 · answered by Christabelle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-18 06:14:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im not for sure i see where your get n at but they get so attached because the mother is single and raises the child and takes care of her (him) that child believes that her mom is the only one there for her and loves her 100% no matter what happens and they dont want their mom to think they dont love them and they dont want their mom to give love to someone else all the kid needs is at ages 5-7 is to have their mom talk to them
2007-05-01 04:22:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say a mama's girl/boy b/c they are always crowding the mother but a hellion whenever the mother isn't around you can torture them.
2007-05-01 08:27:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋