I haven't seen my cousins for 20-30 years but, I have great memories of visiting them as a kid. Also, my mom (Aunts sister) keeps me up-to-date on what's going on with my cousins. I am far away in a different state and can not go to the funeral (as much as I wish I could). Has getting a condolence card or note from a long lost cousin helped anyone out there with a loss like this? Thanks for your input.
2007-04-23 06:42:24 · 17 answers · asked by txppe2000 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I would say, based on not knowing anything about your relationship, and assuming that you "just lost touch" due to distance, etc. - absolutely, yes, send condolences.
It can give you a chance to think of fond memories, as you jot down a short note to express how fondly you remember your aunt and other long lost cousins/relatives. Tell them you regret not having remained in closer contact. If you tell them something about your aunt that you remember, they will appreciate it and thank you for it.
If possible, go on-line and try to get a plane ticket. Some airlines have special fares for attendance of funerals. Call the airline and see what they can do for you. Go see your family. You only live once, and in the not so distant future you will regret having saved money but lost opportunities....
2007-04-23 07:14:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would send a sympathy card, like from the section that has to do with loss of a mother, and write a message in there saying "I am sorry for you loss. I know it's going to be a long hard road but I am here for you no matter what. If you need anything please let me know. At this time of loss it's important for families to stay together." Something like that. My family was close until my grandma died, there's 4 girls and 2 boys in the family. Everyone stopped talking to each other and just did their own thing, it was very sad and it hurt us kids (grandkids) that were close. Then about 6 years later, a brother (her son, my uncle) died and everyone is close again. Obviously not as close though since it's been so long now they all have husbands, g/f's, b/f's, and kids of their own. It's just a sad time and hard for everyone. I feel for ya. I really do. But anyway, I would just send a card/letter like that. It's short and sweet and lets her know that you're there for her no matter that you guys haven't seen each other in so many years. She'll understand but it may very well take her a while to get back to you since it is probly very hard on her, no matter how old she is or how unexpected it is. My dad died 11 years ago when I was 15, VERY unexpected and I still have a horrible time with it and my grandma was VERY expected and it's still hard. Good Luck and I wish you the best :)
2016-05-17 06:03:36 · answer #2 · answered by christin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's always good in times of loss to have people who comfort you. It's an extra boost to hear from someone who has old connections. Ever gotten in touch with an old friend? Its that same feeling to know that you are not alone. That someone way out there still cares. I'm sure it'd bring a smile to their faces to hear some of your old memories. There are very few times where condolences are inapproriate, this dosen't sound like one of them.
2007-04-23 06:53:17 · answer #3 · answered by Krittyb 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A card to your uncle would be very appropriate. You can include a message about your memories of growing up together.
I don't see any reason(s) why you shouldn't send a card to any one of your cousins- perhaps the cousin you grew up with or one close to your own age. They would probably appreciate hearing from you.
2007-04-23 08:27:52 · answer #4 · answered by Lizzie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A letter of condolences would be appropriate, as a gesture of grief, respect, and sorrow for the family. That you haven't seen them for years doesn't matter. They know who you are and will appreciate the gesture.
2007-04-23 06:48:52 · answer #5 · answered by charliecizarny 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That would be the kind thing to do. The card will help. Put your phone number in it and say they can call to visit or talk anytime. Your Aunt would have wanted that.
2007-04-26 06:08:24 · answer #6 · answered by stargazer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It had been that long since I had seen my cousins when my mom died. I received cards and condolences from them. It was very nice. My mother had been to see my aunt (their mother) so mom had seen my cousins more recently than I had. I was very nice to hear from them and for them to say nice things about my mother. I appreciated it.
2007-04-23 07:01:19 · answer #7 · answered by Patti C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your condolences would be greatly appreciated. Even if you have not had contact in years, now would be the best time to re-establish contact by letting them know you are thinking of them.
Sorry for the loss of your aunt.
2007-04-23 06:47:52 · answer #8 · answered by ladywildfireok 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be a wonderful gesture on your part to send a card. It is nice to know that you are being thought of in your time of grief, especially by those who are far away.
2007-04-23 06:46:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
so sorry
yes a nice card would be perfect and tll them youre feeling the loss with them
light a cang=dle and tell her how much you miss her
she'll hear the prayer
angels do
2007-04-23 06:45:55 · answer #10 · answered by ~*tigger*~ ** 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋