Marriage trouble?

Question

I really need some advice. My husband just basicaly told me that I disgust him. We have been married for a year now. I work my tail off to make him happy. I do not have a job but am looking for one and I go to school. I cook and clean for him and I do everything in my power to make him happy. He told me tonight that he does not know if he love me anymore and if I want to keep him I need to lose weight and get a job. I love him so much, but I have no idea where this anger is coming from. Its out of the blue all the sudden. We have been fine up to today! What have I done wrong? He won't even consider counsaling. I am so depressed. This is really seirous, so I would appriciate seriouse answers. Thank you.

Answer 1

Did something just set him off today or has there been little signs to this. But Hun for him to say lose weight that is just down right rude i am pretty sure that alot of people on here are going to tell you to leave him but just like me do not know the hole story. Most men will not even think about seeing a counselor they are to proud and don't think they have any thing to do with the problem i am speaking from experience. I know that you probably do love him. But maybe it is the bills that are getting to him i am a stay at home mom and when the bills come in every month my husband from time to time takes my head off but later after he calms down he says he is sorry. Hun if you say that he just out of the blue said this that maybe he is having a bad day. Good luck to you and hope that you and your husband do better i know how hard it is in the first year of marriage.

good luck

Answer 2

School and keeping a house are jobs! You are working toward a better future for yourself by going to school and that's important. You aren't responsible for his happiness and you will wear yourself out trying to make him happy all of the time. You are right, this is some serious stuff. He doesn't know if he loves you anymore? If you want to keep him you better lose weight and get a job? Since when was this marriage all up to you? I say if he wants to keep you he should stop talking to you like that!!

He's not being fair and he's not respecitng you. If someone says they don't know if they love you anymore then chances are they don't. I'm not saying that's his case, but it is very insensitive on his part. Refusing counseling is not a good sign either. He sounds immature.



No one will respect you until you respect yourself. Remember that.

Have you gained a lot of weight in the past year that you have been married? has he? That's a weak excuse in my opinion. There is something else behind his anger and I doubt it has anything to do with you...
Maybe you can get some counseling for yourself. I think it would be a good idea to find a job anyway, just in case things take a turn... you will have a safety net. I wish you the best.

Answer 3

i don't declare to appreciate the themes you're dealing with on the grounds that i'm nevertheless youthful myself ,and not married. i'll in spite of the undeniable fact that attempt that can assist you you already know why your guy looks to choose to run solo. maximum adult men on the age of 20 are nevertheless turning out to be up. it incredibly is a time-commemorated actuality that girls mature swifter than adult men,and that's not a stable element. With that pronounced I basically have some inquiries to invite you. a million. have you ever asked your husband why he would not choose to do lots of the belongings you adult men used to do jointly? 2. Did you the two make a mutual determination to get married? 3. would desire to or not that is that on the grounds which you 2 are toddler unfastened for the weekend that he merely needs a while to himself? 4. Does he try this each and every weekend? Getting solutions to 3 of those questions would make it easier to paintings out precisely why it incredibly is he's staying a procedures faraway from you. If for some reason that would not help attempt Marriage counseling. All youthful couples want help beginning out their marriage an that therapist would have the skill to assist furnish the approaches for a extra suitable stronger marriage. whether he would not choose to bypass to a marriage Counselor you ought to nevertheless bypass so which you will extra suitable understand why he's the way he's. the way you're able to positioned up with it extra suitable,or not.

Answer 4

First let me tell you my story, my marriage was good I cooked and cleaned I had a job and took care of my son and husband
He would call me when ever he was going to be late for dinner.It started with one night then two nights without calling me.It just went down hill from there and I don't no why,so I ask
him what was wrong with him he said he had been thinking of moving out for sometime now.What did I do I said,you did nothing I just don't want our marriage to get any worse then it
is.Like a fool I wanted to believe him so bad that I refused to see what was really going on just like you.We don't want to believe our husband could and would sleep with another woman but they do and they don't have a problem doing it.
My husband told me he didn't think he loved me anymore,I don't think cutting my leg off would of hurt as bad as that did.
My husband did move out right by his girlfriend that I did not no about until he moved back home with me.I'm telling you this so you don't think you are the only one this has happened to.My husband came back because he knew I could get along without him,when he walked out the door it was the hardest thing I had to do not to try and stop him.I knew I had to let him go so he could find his way back on his own.You will
need to be very strong and let him go if he wants to leave you.
So many of us wives had to go through this because of the women out there who don't care if a man is married or not.It
doesn't take much for our husbands to cheat on us,stand up to him and show him you won't die without him and the world
won't stop turning if he leaves you.I no it's not what you want to hear but if he wants to leave there isn't anything you can do about it.Show him you are a strong woman and he will respect you for it,and maybe he will start looking at you the way he did when you first got married.Remember this, he loves you, he just needs to look deep within himself, it is there.
.He will come around they always do,and when he does the love will be stronger then ever before. Good Luck !!

Answer 5

He's cheating or thinking about it! Don't blame yourself, my first husband hit me and cheated on me. I met him when I was 17 and and took my 2 kids and left him when I was 22. A woman can only take so much! I am now 25 with another baby and happily married to a wonderful man who appreciates a full woman, he is 35. Don't sweat it, trial and error honey, not every man is like the last. You never know, the right husband could be just around the corner. There is someone for everyone, his loss, not yours!

Answer 6

Hi Sally, Really sorry you are having marriage problems. Let me tell you my story. I was like you thinking things were going great. Then he buys a 1200cc motorcycle and he's gone for awhile and then show up in a couple of hours. To make the story short he was cheating on me for almost 3 years and we were marry for 30 years. Now let me kick you in your pants. He was sleeping around with his first wife. I feel like kicking his teeth out but i divorce the CHEATER. You have been having marriage problems but you just haven't notice it. He probably has found someone else. Don't look surprised when you find out. Men like these are out for what ever they can get. My ex got half of my house that i had before i met him and some of my other properties i had. Yes the world does SUCK but we women must be strong and move on. Hell we both deserved a lot better than we ended up with. I would file for a divorce before he does. You will be hurt(i was) but you will get over when he is out of your life. Trust me i no!!! If you would like to talk to me email me on this site.
A Friend.
Clowmy

Answer 7

1st of all....PLEASE stop thinking that it is YOU!!!! You are doing all the right things. The 1st thing a woman will do is "Blame Herself", and that is the wrong thing to do. I don't want to speculate...BUT, I think it is possibly his way of trying to break you & your relationship. The 1st thing you need to do is think of all the recent changes that have happened in your day to day living over the past few eeks or months. Did he all the sudden start staying out late, coming home late, or spending less time with you & more time with others? If so, that is a good indication that it may be someone else. I hate to say that, but think about it. You said all has been fine up until tonight. Regardless if he won't get help to save your marriage...get help to "save yourself" God Bless......

Answer 8

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Answer 9

Sounds like somebody doesn't take the vows they made seriously. You should not have to change who you are to be loved. He knew who you were a year ago (gosh you couldn't have changed much in a year). It sounds like he's looking for an excuse to leave and blaming you is his easy ticket out.

My suggestion is, realize that you deserve better than what he's been giving you. Of course, it's hard to leave a relationship but in the long run you will find someone that loves you for who you are.

Answer 10

Any man who cant love you after all this time is pathetic, Im sure you are a strong beautiful woman, but if you are desperate to keep a man who you disgust then buy a cute little nighty and screw hius brains out, but theres someone out there that would kill to have you im sure