My husband and his wife had been facing divorce for quite sometime he finally left. Shortly afterward we strted dating. Of course the ex blames me and that he cheated on her. NOt the case at all. Anyway, his parents really didnt care for his ex-wife much while they were married, but somehow she lied and twisted things to turn them against him. Including his 16 year old daughter. they also have 2 sons who get along with me well, but they get put int the middle by their mom and their grandparents. His parents and his sisters have alienated him for leaving her. His ex wife made the statement that she would make sure his parents never accepts this divorce and your new wife. she has set out to destroy his relationships with his family and has succeed.
2007-04-22 14:14:43 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is time for tuff love. Not nessesarily turning your backs on the family and kids, but putting your foot down and making it very clear to these people where they stand in your life and what you WILL do if they don't knock it off per say. But you have to fallow through and be very consistant(like dealing with two year olds). If theylike her better, let them have her(the ex). Follow your visitation decree but don't force anything, the kids will come around on thier own. And in a couple years when the kids are older they'll havetheir own minds to make up about who's right or who's wrong.
2007-04-22 14:24:36 · answer #1 · answered by cricket s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very difficult situation and a sad one as well. My husband's ex did her best to make sure that his three children felt he was the bad guy and it has taken years to get things sorted out. Even now it is not perfect. But with two out of three of the children, he has been able to finally have a relationship. It is sad that a spouse would want to take out their anger by bad mouthing the other but if happens. Kids should not have to pay for a marriage that went bad and the spouses should never taint their children's minds against the other spouse. It just isn't right. I feel for what you are going through and my only suggestion is what we have done. Give your husband all the support you can and let him know that he isn't responsible for what his ex does to ruin him in his children's and ex's families eyes. Do the best you can. We worked hard to gain some trust back and it's been worth it. But the viciousness is terrible from the ex. We just have moved past it after 16 years. My husband has accepted what he cannot change. And you know what? We are happy. You can't let it kill you and you have to go with what you have. I hope you are able to find a similar way to accept what you haven't total control over.
2007-04-22 14:33:05 · answer #2 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They will turn themselves for or against him. You cant control what others do or how they act, including your man.
Just be by his side and dont get caught up in the family drama.
That is baggage and your relationship may need someone to pull them out of that by not fixing it and moving on with the here and now.
If his family believes it you cant do anything about it.
Just remind him of how beautiful the world is and be the one to initiate good stuff when bad drama comes from this ex and her scams.
If the ex is telling truth and this bothers you then pray for wisdom. or except what is at hand. good luck.
2007-04-22 14:39:24 · answer #3 · answered by beachgirl90 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In due time they will find out how controlling his ex wife is. Tell your husband to sit back and just wait until the dust settle. If his family truly love him, they will see through her lies.
2007-04-22 14:44:06 · answer #4 · answered by lisaraye 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RE: Why do ex-spouse's attempt to instruct toddlers against ex-husband's and develop into bitter whilst ex-husband re-marries. I certainly have been married to my husband for 4 years now. we are a mixed relatives. I certainly have 3 toddlers and he has a million toddler along with his ex-spouse. i'm 15 years youthful than my husband and eight years youthful than his ex-spouse, i could hate to think of that has something to do along with her resentment twords me. in the begining...
2016-10-03 10:16:08 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should simply stay out of it. If they are truly close family then they will come to their own conclusions. Sometimes the dust has to settle for people to be able to see in front of them.
2007-04-22 14:20:19 · answer #6 · answered by mosaic 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If others want to be controlled by the ex, more power to them. Let it be known she's not controlling you or your marriage.
2007-04-22 14:31:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋