Do you think kids should behave more like adults when the adults are around them?

Question

I believe kids should be trained to go into two modes. The first mode is when they are around kids they can act like kids and do silly stuff, but in the second mode they need to act like adults not be acting all hyper. Instead, they should be well mannered, polite, and obedient to their parents. This way kids can be kids yet when adults are present, they can be mature 'little adults'.

Answer 1

I tend to agree with this one also. However, one TRAINS an animal, not a human being, unless you are into mind control and slavery.

My children went to an alternative school that was used as a model for a different approach to education. There were NO last names. The principal was Liz, the teachers were Larry and Karen, etc. This school was very heavy on parent participation and as a result 95% of our kids turned out very very very well compared to the other inner city school in our area.

You might think they would have no idea of how to behave. Au contraire. These kids grew up without that "US" and "them" mindset so predominant today. Maybe it was because of the parental involvement, I do not know. They all grew up knowing who deserved the proper form of address. Miracle!

When it comes to kids being kids, yes, they are forced to be little adults all too soon. I put THAT down to peer pressure, the crap they see on the idiot box, and the toys they play with, especially girls. (whoore in training dolls) .

There is really only ONE set of manners children need. They involve the basic courtesy and the ability to behave whatever circumstances they are in. It is a matter of fine tuning depending upon the situation.

To the person who advocated blowing bubbles in their chocolate milk, you miss the entire point. What is permissible with your peers is not permissible at Great Aunt Lindy's birthday party! Children need to know when it is appropriate to run and play. Around older adults, as in seniors, it is NOT appropriate indoors. If the party is outdoors, run all you want.

I NEVER asked a single person I visited with my toddlers to put things up out of reach. They were taught from the get go to mind what they touched by simply a "nooo noo nooo sweetheart, don't touch!". Now is THAT hurting their ability to play when someone comes and swings them up and diverts their attention? They were taught respect by example.

One of the reasons America is such a mess today is because children have been allowed too much freedom and not enough discipline. The governmental stance that spanking is illegal is ridiculous and just another opportunity for the government to weaken parental control from their children. Once in a blue moon a red bottom is the ONLY way to get a point across and it has NOTHING to do with an inability to "talk it over peacefully."

This ridiculous law also helps to weaken the family union. It is from Sweden, the bastion of feminazism, the country that wants to legalize the MAN TAX and give children only gender neutral names. I speak only of a spank on the bottom for a serious problem. I spanked my older three times. Twice she said, "Thanks Mom, I really needed that!" Then we got on with life and nothing more was said.

When I read the words "mature little adults" I do believe this means teaching a child when it is appropriate to mind their P's and Q's and to behave for a certain amount of time. This is certainly not TOO onerous. Kids need to learn manners and proper behavior and that what is appropriate in the schoolyard is NOT appropriate at Gramma's house or in a restaurant.

Sandy you are right, just please do not use the word TRAIN. Civilizing the little beasts is a much better way to word it. (I had to say that just to tick some of the readers off LOL)

Answer 2

I also trained my kids to eat in restaurants from early ages. Many times they are much quieter than the adults surrounding us, though occasionally our 2 year old will act up (we respond by removing him immediately). That being said I've sat in restaurants with families who's children aren't well behaved. I agree that banning families all together isn't reasonable. when someone is being disruptive in a restaurant (adult or otherwise) the management should ask them to leave. I think a better option might be to have family dining hour in restaurants that seem to have a lot of family clientele. Perhaps offering kid friendly specials (like an early bird) between 5 and 7 pm, which is usually a slow time prior to the dinner rush for most restaurants.

Answer 3

Hmm, as a parent of two boys, 15 and 8 yrs old, I cringe at the word "train". I train my dogs, not my kids :p Anyway..

I think that yes, children should know when to act like kids and when to calm down a bit and act more mature.


But it's a two way street, in my experience. The best way to get kids to learn how to act in the presence of adults is to treat the children with respect from day 1. I do not demand any respect from my kids that I am also not willing to give back to them. I have never talked down to them, or treated them as though they were less than me simply because they were younger.


In adult company, they are calm, well-spoken, polite, and ... here is the key element.. comfortable. They are comfortable around adults.


I also think, however, that adults should remember that kids are kids. They have more energy then we adults do, and we should not expect them to sit still for hours on end without the occasional outburst of energy.

Answer 4

First of all, I believe strongly that adults should stop placing all these soul-crushing expectations on children to behave like adults. Most adults don't even behave properly, so why should kids be expected to do something the adults don't have a handle on?
And second, kids have their creativity and liveliness destroyed enough by school and idiot teachers following some textbook blindly, so when out and about, kids should be kids. You learn from mistakes, so if they aren't allowed to make any, how will they ever learn? Blow bubbles in your chocolate milk, make faces at dogs, draw all over your arm.... enjoy being a child while you can.

Answer 5

No kids should act like kids but when I was growing up my sisters and brother always knew that we had better act polite and be on our best behavior whenever we were around other adults or we would get into some serious trouble by my dad. I guess that's how I learned to respect others especially adults.

Answer 6

Kids should be kids with the proper manners that will be needed for both situations. The one thing I taught all five of mine is respect and proper manners. I could take them into a store without having to worry whether they'd run off or not; they never did.

Answer 7

I think kids should act like themselves with showing respect to adults around them

Answer 8

As an adult, I would rather see the adults act like the kids. Lifes too short for all that serious crap.

Answer 9

You're right sweetie, kids can be kids but only when they're with their friends. Around adults they should behave maturely and mind their manners.
XOXO

Answer 10

kids can be well mannered and obedient and still act like a kid ... why would you want a kid to act like an adult ... they have enough time to grow up and act adult