Whats up with cash bars?

Question

At the risk of getting some people worked up...
Why do people think its ok to have cash bars at weddings?
I just think its so tacky. I mean, if you have the money, spend it on a great reception and let your guests just enjoy. If you dont have the money, dont offer what you cant give them, cake and soda/coffee are just as lovely!
Tell me, what do you think?

By "cash bar" I mean where the guest has to pay for their drink themselves.

Answer 1

You are hosting an event and the people who attend are your guests.

The same rules apply whether you're having the party in your home or a reception in a rented hall. You don't invite people into your house for a dinner party and then say "Want a glass of wine? $5 each!" If you can't afford a full open bar (or prefer not to) it is always acceptable to serve a limited selection, or even none at all.

Answer 2

normally the reason behind having a cash bar, is sometimes you've got several people that enjoy drinking more than others, it's cheaper for you to have them pay for their drinks. That is the reason behind the idea of having a cash bar, and even some wedding plannes will suggest them. Having an open bar for part of the wedding can be done but is suggested after a certain time switching to a cash bar is better and will help keep drinking in excess in check.
I personally think that having just cake, soda and coffee offered after the reception just having that is just fine too. There is nothing wrong with having what is known as a dry wedding. No drinking at all.

Answer 3

Having a cash bar or open bar is a very hard thing for people to agree on. There are some people who only go to weddings to eat and drink, not really going for the couple. Then there are those who actually go for the couple.

I really have no problem with a cash bar simply because I dont go to weddings to drink on someone Else's dime. The last wedding i went to all they offered was wine and beer and people complained. I also went to a wedding with no alcohol being served and no one complained at all. Since there is so many ways to do the whole alcohol thing, i really think it is up to the couple.

At my wedding we are only having the bar "open" during cocktail hour, and then later on in the night. I will be providing my guests with a choice of 2 drinks, and whatever else they want they can pay for it themselves.

I really think that if someone is offended because they aren't going to be allowed to get wasted at your wedding, then they shouldn't go at all.

Its all about the budget and what the couple wants to take care of. You are not required to have a fully stocked open bar to please everyone. If a couple only wants to have beer, wine or non alcoholic choices, then it is up to them. Nothing dictates you are responsible to get everyone wasted.

Answer 4

I agree with you 100%, if you can't afford it, then provide what you can afford. People get so worked up about weddings, but I think with all the cable networks who have these wedding shows on that show all these "dream" weddings really feeds into that emotional thought process. Brides think they HAVE to have an open bar (they don't), people think they HAVE to provide a sit down dinner (hor'duerves are fine--cake and punch are fine), etc. etc. Basically, people have champagne tastes on beer budgets! LOL I also think people focus way too much on the reception part of the wedding, and less on the actual wedding, and what you're celebrating. A wedding is part of 1 day, however your marriage should last a lifetime.

Answer 5

I think cash bars are fine. A lot of people want and expect alcohol at a party, but it's VERY expensive for the hosts (esp on top of all other expenses).

If people don't want to buy drinks, they can partake of whatever is included...I personally don't have any problem buying a cocktail or few if I'm at a wedding reception. I appreciate that the booze is available (since I enjoy it) instead of having only tea/soda/punch/water if the hosts cannot afford to provide an open bar.

I don't expect others to pay for that particular luxury...otherwise they ought to provide a selection of free cigarettes also, for their smoking guests.

At my wedding we provided 1 keg of beer and alcoholic punch as "adult" options...cash bar was available in a different room across the hall, for those that wanted a cocktail.

Answer 6

I agree with you. when you invite guests to a reception then they souldnt have to pay for anything while they are there. most are already giving a gift to you, then have to put out money for drinks too. thats just rude. I skimped out on stuff for myself at my wedding just to be able to have money to serve good food and drinks. my mom made everything herself and we bought all the alcohol for the wedding and there was still tons left over and we didnt spend all that much either. couples are so concerned with themselves these days. and I find it sad that so many questions are about how to ask for money instead of a gift and yet so many people think nothing about having a cash bar...as long as they get cash gifts too.

Answer 7

I 100% agree with you!!! We are getting married in October, we can not afford to have an open bar so we are supplying a keg of beer, and set ups (soda, ice, and cups). We are telling everyone to BYOB this might be tacky to some people, but I don't think it is as tacky as asking your guests to pay for extremely over priced drinks at your reception all night long!!!

Answer 8

Not being a drinker myself, i don't understand the need to drink hard liquor at a wedding.
Just offer wine with dinner and champagne with dessert.If you want a specialty drink, then enjoy it for a short time.
It is tacky to have a cash bar and let your guests know it's ok to get drunk.

Answer 9

I think it's soooo crazy how worked up people get over cash bars! They act like their damn alcoholics! It also amazes me how people get so upset when they're no alcohol provided!

If you can't afford a full service bar, but you'd really like to have something...go with beer and a specialty drink. That's what I'm doing.

If alcohol is out of your budget, don't have it. You have just as good of a time as any other.

Answer 10

It can be quite expensive to foot the bill for everyone.

One alternative: Make beer/wine free, other stuff cash.

Two: Have limited open bar (like hour and a half), anything after that is cash.

If you have the money, great. If you don't, you still want to give them something and still have the option of them getting more, just that you can't pay for it.