Why are there so many liars, cheaters, abusers?

Question

Breaking their marriage vows to love, honor, cherish, obey for better or worse, in sickness or health, till death do us part?
Why would a man or woman want to put someone through all these three?

In answer to one of my previous questions: someone mentioned about if a person/my husband treats someone miserably it's because they feel miserable inside.
I agree with Tolliver, it's like they have to hurt someone to feel better.
But why so many? And why do they do this? Don't they realize they hurt themselves too? And the ones they claim to love?

knowsighnlanguage: what about the women who are getting their faces punched in or choked on
and the spouses say sorry, I love you, won't do it again (lie), and then they do it again (promisebreak), and they cheat, and on it goes>

What about the men who don't know their wives cheat and having babies with another man or vice versa? The man has 2 families and the wife doesn't know he has a double life?

Answer 1

Because these people feel worthless and need quick happiness and feeling that they have the upper hand givves them a high. They get pleasure knowing they are making someone feel worse than they feel. Misery love s company.

Answer 2

They exist because you LET them exist. People go into marriage without realising that it SHOULD be a life-long commitment....if you're unsure of your ability to commit, then DON'T.

I'll tell you what....once you get over the first few years of settling in to a relationship, you end up getting MUCH more out of it than you ever imagined. Never get too comfortable, because you will start looking at the "green grass on the other side of the fence" (which is usually greener, because it it built over the top of a sewage pit)

I married at age 21, we had three kids by the time we were 27. We went through turmoils, trials, problems and all that stuff. Now it's got to the stage where we actually KNOW what each other is thinking, and we are still "holding hands" even though we are approaching our 36th Wedding Anniversary. Our kids have all grown up and moved out - now we can have a fantastic time together - we own our own house AND an Investment Property, we have a Share Portfolio, owe nothing to no-one, have an active sex life.....can't have babies, no need for contraception, just live life to the fullest. Our kids visit regularly, but we send them off to get on with their OWN lives.

Of course, my husband keeps me on my toes - he introduces me to people as "his PRESENT wife" or his "CURRENT" wife...it makes people sit up and take notice. Good fun, eh?

Answer 3

Because so much is availabe today to tempt people. I think many couples start out with honor and when they get comfortable they get bored. People want to be entertained. They desire to feel stimulated and want the constant feeling of foreplay excitement. When things go wrong in marriage I feel there is not enough commitment to it. Instead of communicating and trying to work out problems they look out side of it for a quick fix. When they don't find it they crawl back begging for the marriage again. .......and with the trust broken, our beliefs shattered, and our love torn.........we try sometimes to just learn to live with it all. Nothing is the same so her we go again starting over recommitting and wonder if and when we will get hurt again. We are put through the lies, the cheating, and abuse because some peopledon't know what love is........they say the words but don't know how to show it! They are so selfish and we wonder our judgement in choosing these type of people we believed to share our whole life with. I guess because we just want to believe that they feel the way that we do,and they really don't. It all confuses us and breaks our spirit to believe in marriage.

Answer 4

Have you ever bought a car and suddenly you see the same car everywhere when in the past you rarely did. The same goes for affairs. When you trust that is what you see and project but have a spouse or a friends spouse have an affair and you see them everywhere. The same amount of these sleazy lying cheaters are out there every day. Most didn't set out to purposefully have the affair they forgot the NO part when caught up in the first flush and excitement.

Answer 5

IF you care about someone you dont care you will stick through all lifes challenges. If you can not do all those then you should of never got married. and are a coward. But all that listed above is LIFE. you cherish the one you love you would obey them and compermise and just because they get sick should not change the way you feel about them. And when they die you grieve then you have to move on.

.that is whats wrong with people now a days it's to easy to run from problems instead of working them out. Instead of running they need to stay and talk about the problems and work them out even if it takes all night long or days they need to stay and talk. THE REASON why people break those vows is because they run instead of staying and talking..

Answer 6

I can't honestly give you specific reasons for why people do these things because too many factors play a role in these kinds of people. The only thing I can tell you is to pick yourself up and start from scratch. With every ending comes a new beginning. All you can do is get away from a bad relationship and search for a good one, even if it takes a while. I have faith in you that you can find true love. I wish you the best and I urge you to look to the future with optimism.

Answer 7

Come on take a good look around 30 years ago it wasn't like this at all . Not to many people care about peoples feelings anymore. Just another sign of the times.

Answer 8

Hi hun-
Don't know if you are in this situation- but as a society we have allowed for many years the divorce rate to remain above 50%.
It is accepatble fot people to divorce without question- people just know it is happened and don't ask for details. Back in the day- fols asked questions about divorce- what happened- why- it put a mark on the family name.
No one cares anymore- familes are no longer sacred.

Answer 9

I have been through hell and back with mean men, divorces, etc... I've finally decided that there are just CRUEL PEOPLE out there!!! I am just glad I'm not like them, and you should be glad that you are not that kind of person! Time does heal all wounds, but get another passion in life! Good Luck!

Answer 10

Because every problem has a root, they are looking for love in all the wrong places, when really what they are looking for is to be loved, Jesus loved us so much that He died on the cross for our sins, He came to give us life, and life more abundently, if we want to defeat sin and live a joyful life, all we have to do is invite Him to come into our hearts and recieve His love....God bless ya