They are something else. He and I have a great relationship. They cannot get over a divorce which happened 6 yrs ago. They were totally concerned for her and her only when he nearly died in the hospital. Nevermind I have been sleeping with him for 5 yrs. I called to find out how he was doing and was surprised whtn the nurse handed her the phone and introduced her as his wife. She was reviewing his medical chart with the nurse claiming to be his wife. She comes to his family reunions and shows up without her husband is what blows my mind. Doesnt she feel a little bit out of place?
When he got out of the hospital, she offered to spend the nite to take care of him. He told her he didnt need her. The kids, who by the way are not hers, thought it would be a great idea.
What is going on here? Is it me or is it him?
2007-04-20 16:46:35 · 4 answers · asked by happydawg 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The kids are 29, 30 and 25 yrs old. Their mom married in 1988 and gave them a sister who is now 15.
2007-04-20 16:54:05 · update #1
My father married a woman none of us liked (4 of us) but at the time they met we were all younger (like 14,15,18 & 22). Because we kicked up such a stink about it then, the lady thought we seriously hated her..which of course we didnt. It was difficult to try to understand as we were torn between our loyalty to our mother & being uncomfortable with seeing our dad with another woman. Selfish, perhaps, but thats just the way our minds worked.
Years later after us 'kids' moved out of dads place & went out to experience life on our own, we all realised that all that mattered was that both our parents were happy, but unfortunately, dads wife thought we still harboured the silly feelings towards her. I am now 27 & sadly my dad & his wife have broken up because she could not let go of the things that happened years ago.
By what you are saying, I think its a little bit of her (trying to get up your nose), a little bit of him (who wouldnt want an ex still fawning over them!! or perhaps he doesnt realise the pain its causing you & just wants to keep the peace), a little bit of the kids (loyalty can be a killer) & a little bit if you (letting her & the kids responses get to you)
If you truely cant put it aside, then I would suggest you seriously reconsider the relationship...you dont want to spend the best years of your life worrying over someone elses problems or surrounding yourself with people who treat you with such contempt.
Talk with your partner, tell him how it is affecting you & go by his reaction. He needs to support you here, he needs to talk with his 'kids' & tell them their attitudes are way out of line & that iyou are a great person & are making him the happiest he has ever been & the last thing you want to do is come between him & them.
You'll know in your heart what you need to do, listen to it instead of paying heed to what is going on around you. Best of luck :o)
2007-04-20 17:31:48 · answer #1 · answered by Mrs D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I had more info about your past and the relationship. But.....
The problem is your boyfriend. If your boyfriend truly loves you, then he should respect your feelings and not remain such close friends with his ex, especially when it is making you feel so uncomfortable. His ex either wants him back or is taking great delight in making you uncomfortable and totally miserable and feel like you are out of place around his family.
The kids have not accepted you after 5 years, it's probably not going to happen.
I think it's time for you to move on to a more healthy relationship.
2007-04-20 17:16:13 · answer #2 · answered by Susan D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it is the problem of your very weak boyfriend. He needs to set the grown up brats straight. It is his life and it is ridiculous that he lets them control it or that he is still involved with his ex.
This is a real can of worms. If he is this weak, you should run in the opposite direction before all of them make your life hell.
2007-04-20 16:58:02 · answer #3 · answered by notyou311 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So is this a problem with the kids or her?
How old are the kids?
Where is there real mom?
2007-04-20 16:51:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋