To thoses with sucessful marriages?

Question

what is the secret? re: trust, possible infidelity, children, money. how to survive and not be a divorce statistic?

Answer 1

I would have to say for myself it comes down to constant communication, compromise and being honest, faithful and
working things out at all times. Never leaving arguments unsettled/resolved. Keeping your spouse happy, doing things as a couple and as a family. Never placing work above your family life. Having God in your marriage and life and something to believe in. You should never place money or children as importance of making your marriage better. If you look at statistics divorce revolves around finances and children that were not planned.

I think it comes down to love for the person you are with keeping that fire burning, and just being sensitive to your spouses needs and goals in life.

I have been married for almost 8yrs and well there are always up's and down's you jusat have to conquer each one as it comes up.

Here is a list of things that wil help in a marriage that will keep it strong:

1. Trusting meaning jealousy is a not to be mentioned.
2. Faithful-no cheating, no threesomes etc.
3. Honest
4. Do not bottle up emotions.
5. Resolve issues as a couple do involve family members!
6. Keeep your spouse happy
7. Nagging is a huge turn-off
8. Men love B J's
9. Be knowledgable in the bedroom read books on the topic of sex and love making.
10. Always be open to compromise in any situation
11. Never buy something you cannot afford.
12. Try to stay out of debt.
13 Never rush into parenthood
14. Do not engage in inappropriate discussions with the opposite sex.
15. Stay away from porn
16. Always go out as a couple your single life is over!
17. Never make assumptions without evidence.
18. Do not control your spouse in anyway.
19. No Flirting!
20. Stay out of Chat rooms!
21. NO emails to strangers of the opposite sex unless it is famaily or a friend you both know and your spouse is aware.
22. Never allow your spouse to be selfish in the sac you should both be expecting to have pleasure.
23. Never think that your husband can demand sex from you
your not a slave.
24. Allows have open communication were both iof you share opinions.
25. Allows discuss big purchases with your spouse anything over 50 dollars I would say is proper. Except groceries. I'm talking about toys, cars, a house, etc.

I hope this help you out God Bless and Best Wishes.

Answer 2

It takes two and consistancy. If one lacks the will or slacks off on their responsibilities then there will be problems. Marriage is for those who can love eachother unconditionally, for the mature, for the honest and there is no room for jealousy and communication is part of the whole, if you have these things love can withstand any obsticals and any illusions and trust is there. But both must have the will and have the desire to want a lasting relationship -you can start off by syaing o.k. this is what we'll do but if one of you lacks the giving of these things you are back to square one. Communication must also go as far as dicussing s_x with one another, if you can not be honest or tell your spouce that strange has been on your mind then problems will arise!!! If you know what I mean, if you can't talk about s_x with your spouce then who can you talk to about it with... An open mind helps as well as being best friends... Problems will come and problems will go but a "controlled" argument is a must if arguing must be done at all. Relax and go withthe flow compromise alwasys and that is never ending and it can be fun to see what solutions you come up with!

Answer 3

Hello AC, Never jeapordize the trust thathas been built between spouses. So honesty is a biggy. Another is compromise, seems as though people get rapped up in thier own worlds and forget the importance of the little things. Communication is also Very important, keep both lines open, listening as well as speaking. If you can do this your marriage will not faulter. Twenty and counting

Answer 4

Communication

Answer 5

First and foremost...Be honest with yourself !!!

If you lie to yourself IE Become a close model of what you think the other person desires. You have commit ed the first act of getting a divorce in the future.

Simply put...If you like sitting at home on Sunday, watching football, scratching your @$$ and farting...Let the other person KNOW up front. That is how it is, and it won't change.

Believe it or not, you may not get many repeat dates/offers. But the ones you do get, will be much healthier in the long run.

You can't spring your darkest secret on your spouse 5 years after you said I do....Because she/he did not say "I Do" to something you neglected to tell them.

Answer 6

Communications. Lack of it, the machine runs rough. When it run out, divorce is right around the corner.

Don't fail to communicate, and 1/2 the battle is won.

20+ years with the same women and still as happy as day one.

Answer 7

Communication!!! That is really the root of all things. Knowing how to address a problem when it arises. Knowing how to say you appreciate what the other does for you. Knowing how to express your love daily. Knowing how to have a friendly conversation. There are so many aspects of communication that are important in a marriage and if you successful with all of them it will get you far.

Answer 8

Hard work...open communications...and comprimise. Some days you have to weigh the issue and think "is this worth making a stand for?". There are many people who let pride stand in their way. Although we all have pride that is one of the things that should not interfere with you and your spouse.
Pride is not something you should take a stand on when arguing with your spouse. Its hollow. You stand on principal.
People who argue for the sake of pride are fools and will fail in marriage.

Answer 9

After 30+ years of marriage I'd say to forgive and move on. Don't get hung up when a problem develops, let go of a grudge before it weighs you down.

Also make a commitment that your marriage "Will Work" and don't let one or two problems be an excuse to bail out (Believe me you'll have more than one or two problems :) )

And above all, have fun, your spouse is your friend and you are hers/his.

Answer 10

I've been married for over 20 years - kids, dogs, cats, mother-in-laws the enchilada. You must be flexible, have a sense of humor, choose your battles wisely and be buddies. My husband and I are complete opposites but we still like each other. I love the man more than cash!