after people divorce, why cant people just co habitate with there new partners.. who initiates getting remarried? for what ? are people that insecure.... once you have been doomed once....... why attempt to be doomed twice, etc., etc?
2007-04-20 07:37:28 · 11 answers · asked by greeneyedflavor 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Personally, I would learn my lesson.. I wouldn't even remarry the second time. It's a waste of a prenup. And it's true.. the only way I'll get a divorce is if a person cheats. That's just intolerable.
2007-04-20 08:14:57 · answer #1 · answered by JuDyLicious 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you describe is called serial monogamy.
Recent studies show that men cheat 60% of the time and women 40%. I don't think it's for the reasons people assume (just sex or for the thrills, etc).
I assume that, contrary to social opinion, monogamy isn't normal for all people. Unfortunately, society isn't accomodating to those who want to be both honest and are not naturally monogamous. Open relationships are seriously frowned upon.
Most guys or girls don't cheat to get sex. It happens, but not to most people, IMO. Most fall in love unexpectedly and only have three options they see open to them. Leave the new relationship, which is brutally difficult, or cheat, or leave the old relationship (also difficult). Society has shown them only those three choices. To those who seem to believe people are natually monogamous, assuming the above figures didn't change there mind, there is also the fact that polygyny (“many wives”) is still culturally prevalent on the globe—out of 853 known human cultures, 84 percent permit polygyny. Obviously monogamy isn't as prevalent as many in the west would wish to believe.
American men have at least one affair over the course of their marriage,” and recent surveys suggest that the chance of either member of a modern couple committing infidelity at some point in their marriage may be as high as 76 percent—with these numbers increasing every year. Though most people in our culture consider themselves—and are believed to be—monogamous, anonymous surveys reveal that many are so socially, but not biologically.
In other words, social monogamy frequently masks biological polyamory in an increasingly significant number of couples. It may also be important to note that the prevalent relationship paradigm in the modern West is no longer lifelong monogamy (“till death do us part”), but serial monogamy (many partners sequentially), often punctuated with adultery. Serial monogamy, plus clandestine adultery, is in many respects not too different from polyamory, except that the latter is more honest, ethical, and arguably less harmful. In this context, the mindful exploration of polyamory may help in alleviating the suffering caused by the staggering number of clandestine affairs in our modern culture.
I am polyamorous. I am very open about my feelings and non-monogamous nature. I always make certain everyone involved is aware and OK before I enter into a relationship (their significant other(s), if they have them, and my wife). Though sex is a component of these romantic relationships, it's no different than anyone with a girlfriend or wife. They are long term and very loving relationships.
For those who are not monogamous, but not interested in long-term romantic relationships (i.e. sex is the more important aspect) and want to be open and honest with their partner, there is swinging. I"ve never experienced it, so cannot talk about it much.
I've always wondered why people find cheating (breaking the rules) or serial monogamy more acceptable than open and honest non-monogamy.
2007-04-20 14:41:48 · answer #2 · answered by Radagast97 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people, after they have had a relationship with someone and it's fallen by the way, have a lot of differculty adjusting back to normality.
The longer the relationship the worse the porblem.
It is really about habit. One must create a "new" habit to eradicate the last. Sometimes that is very hard for some people if oportunity for a new relationship does not appear. thus, they slip back into what they regard as a comfortable situation.
2007-04-20 14:45:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not about being insecure. I personally have been married twice,we tried but we just weren't able to stay together,we are still great friends and I look foward to getting married again one day. Why just "play house"? To me living together is for those who aren't willing to give enough of themselves to each other to have a successful relationship, and if they split up there is no financial reprocussions.Thats all anyone worries about anymore.You can't look at as marriage as being "doomed".If you do, youre speaking it into existence.
2007-04-20 15:44:31 · answer #4 · answered by kim g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People do this because they want to and have hope it will work out the second, third or forth time around. Would living together without the ceremony make it any better? No, it would be the same except the break up would be simpler. Big deal.
Why do you ask?
2007-04-20 14:44:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, bitter one, they get married again, and again, and again, because they never give up on love and life!!!!
They always believe that there is someone else out there, and I commend people for doing that, once they are hurt, they get over it, they move on and then they find another love!!!!
They are not bitter in love and life like it sounds like you are, I suggest you try doing what they do, and then you will not have to ask this question.
2007-04-20 14:46:16 · answer #6 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very simple some people fear just being alone and need someone to love them.
2007-04-20 14:59:11 · answer #7 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people never learn.
2007-04-20 14:44:35 · answer #8 · answered by marisanj 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
eh tax breaks
2007-04-20 14:41:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
people learn from there mistakes, well not everybody!
2007-04-20 14:42:23 · answer #10 · answered by jozlilnanjos 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋