If you've never been there before and didnt think their place would be such a mess, would it change your perception of that person?
2007-04-20 03:20:42 · 16 answers · asked by thing4reason 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
In addition: the person has no good excuse (no kids, works 40 hr/week etc.)
2007-04-20 03:39:08 · update #1
Yes it would have to change your perception of a person, every bit of information you learn about an individual changes your perception a bit, it is natural.
As to how it would change mine would depend on how I thought about them in the first place. If as you say I didn't think them to be a messy person, I would wonder what the mental state of that person really is. Living in a mess can be a sign of a mental disorder, OCD or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. He/she might not be able to throw anything away. Or, they might have been raised to believe this is a normal way to live and have yet to grasp their own values as we all do as we grow up. Or, this person might be passive/aggressive. In public, mild mannered and attentive and in private, aggressive and lazy.
I have a friend who is a teacher, 5th grade. Her husband is a therapist, for the aged. You would think from that short description that they would be kind and thoughtful people. Well, they are, except when it comes to their things...everything they own is a sloppy mess. It's not like they don't have time, they both work and could afford to pay for help and they both have weekends off. They just ignore their home, cars, yard and anything within! They act like having to kick things out of your way to make a path to the bathroom is normal!
How did I handle the first time there? Well...I am not very subtle. I waited for her to kick a path through month old newspapers, clothes dropped where they were removed, empty bags of chips and a dozen books as well as goddess knows what...and said, " want some help cleaning this up?"
Thats when I found out what the problem was. They are so social, they rush around the house to get out asap to go be with somebody...anybody! She was willing to clean the house if I, or her other friends were there with her but if she was alone or with her husband...she would have that fight or flight syndrome and believe me..she would fly!
Bottom line, some of us have helped her clean but that didn't fix the problem. She needs to learn how to control herself and just bite the bullet and clean.
2007-04-20 03:39:03 · answer #1 · answered by mrscmmckim 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, it depends how much of a disaster it was!!
If it was a bit messy and untidy it wouldn't really change my perception of that person. My best friend's home is a bit messy but I know its because she's busy and generally a bit pre-occupied most of the time!
But if its was a full blown disaster area but dirty pots laying about and no clear surfaces, then frankly, Id be disgusted and it would definitely change my opinion of them!
2007-04-20 10:36:47 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess it comes down to just what a disaster is.
Most people have a little mess in their life some times.
To many things & not enough room for them.
But as part of my work I get to see some real messes.
And yes you wouldn't think that a person would live like that.
2007-04-20 10:31:23 · answer #3 · answered by Floyd B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would most likley think that they work very hard and have small children. and have a lot of trouble keeping up with things. I couldnt see why anyone would want to live in a messy house, I know I go nuts when my house gets messy and donr know where to begin. I like to look at the positives in people if I can.
2007-04-20 10:34:28 · answer #4 · answered by eightieschick70 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes I think it would change my view of that person. If someones home is a disaster then usually their life is also a disaster in some way. After the initial disgust I would probably feel sorry for them.
2007-04-20 10:25:38 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It realy depends on what kind of disaster it is. For instance, if it is dishes piled up and toys on the floor, i think they have alot going on and have not learned to manage time yet. There is no fault in that. BUT if they are the type that have garbadge on the floor, ashtrays overflowing cups and dishes laying about the rest of the house., spills yet to be cleaned up.. they simply have no drive and no pride.
2007-04-20 10:35:03 · answer #6 · answered by charisma 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on how bad it actually is. Some places are unhealthy due to lack of cleanliness and that is inexcusable. I work two jobs (one fulltime and one part time) and go to college and I run a household alone. My house is neat but may need dusting but it is usually reasonably presentable.
2007-04-20 10:27:36 · answer #7 · answered by Maria b 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would kinda show me that if i want to be with that person that since they can't take care of something as small as there place what makes you think they would work at a relationship or anything else like that!!!!
2007-04-20 15:34:13 · answer #8 · answered by ashie bug 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on the situation, each person is different... each person has "whatever" going on in their life at a given time... I think we all inherently hope for a BETTER WAY thru a CLEANER more stable house.
2007-04-20 10:26:37 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, in fact, it would. And has. If a house is messy, it is generally also unclean. And that shows that they have little respect or care for themselves. Or the others that live with them. I think, if you dig deeply, you will see that they are careless with the feelings of others and have a general laziness about them.
2007-04-20 10:25:17 · answer #10 · answered by Super Ruper 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋