Why are women expected to change their names?

Question

When getting married? It's so much trouble - I'm not changing mine (but I don't believe in marriage).

I know you don't have to. But then people address letters to Mr and Mrs - and you can only be Mrs if you share a surname - but you can't be Miss because you're now married. Erm, have to go now.... finished work. Big kiss.xx

Answer 1

Outdated moronic nonsense.

Answer 2

I accepted my Husbands name willingly but only because I wanted to distance myself from my 'Fathers' family. If I'd had my step-dads name I'd have kept it.
It's personal choice. Some just combine the two which is where surnames like Rhys-Jones come from.
Some believe it shows you are a couple in the eyes of 'God' but in most cultures the Man is seen as the head of the family so the wife 'belongs' to that family rather than her birth family.
It's 'traditional' rather than a requirement by law (in the UK anyway)

Answer 3

Not in Greece.

It used to be so, but it is some years now that the Law has changed and women when married keep their name.

Answer 4

Why do men have to pick up the tab? Why do men have to open doors? Why do men have to bring gifts? (chocolates, flowers, jewerly..)

This is the reminants of a courting system that came to be long before you and I were ever born. Yet I'm sure feminists have a field day over this in thier war to humilate men.

The fact of the matter is, if you love them; you marry them. An if your married your seen as not two individuals anymore but 2 parts of a whole. The whole being your last name, the parts being the first. Its a concept that wasn't designed to 'collar' or abuse power; but to show your commitment to each other.

But in a day and age were commitments can barely last years why not take a stab at another failing tradition? The modern way of multiple divorces, multiple parents, multiple homes... all so much more superior. Who needs tradition?

Answer 5

I won't change mine. Well, I don't think that it's important in every relationship. Some married women (my mother, for example) keep their own surnames. My mom's reason is coz it's sounds nicer with her first name, nothing else. Like Shakespeare once said, "What's in a name?"

Answer 6

You don't have to change your name, a lot of times, women just add the new name to their last name. I understand how you feel, I want to keep my name when I get older, and if I ever get married, my wife can choose whether or not she wants to keep her name, I don't have a problem with it.

Answer 7

Technically, from an old fashioned standpoint, you are marrying 'in' to his family, hence taking the name.

I was really against changing my name, but since my husband is younger, he doesn't really care. He told me to do what's comfortable.

After being happy for months, and having our triplets, I decided to do it. I just quietly did the paperwork, and let him find my new social security card in the mail. He was very pleased.

Answer 8

I'm sure you'll get lots of answers that talk about masculinist tradition and ideology, etc., but truthfully, I think it's more about family unity and people wanting all to have the same last name.

I know several men who have changed their last time to the wife's last name instead.

Answer 9

It stems from when the husband was the head of the household and the wife was subservient. Nowadays its just tradition. I am getting married for the 2nd time later this year but will be keeping my own name. Its not mandatory

Answer 10

They aren't expected to, not in this day and age. Personally, if i loved a guy enough to be marrying him i'm not sure i'd care too much about taking his name. But then i'm me i'm not you, so i can't really comment. Basically, we have equal rights now, so we can do whatever the hell we want to! within reason of course. Yey!

Answer 11

That is a good question. I changed mine in marriage now I'm divorced and I would have to pay to get it changed back. Ain't that something.