Help im just a child !!?

Question

I have 2 sisters and 3 brothers where all 7 together well my father is a player and hes always cheating on my mother .... they've been married for 18-20 years my mother kind of got tired of my father cheating on her .... and she left with another guy with out him knowing and she became pregnant n had the baby ( hes 4 months already) well now in the family im the only one who knows about this ( im just 13) she told me not to tell my father (she didnt tell me i found out on my own) now i cant stop thinking about telling my father or what he'll do to her (because they get into physical fights ) HELP ME PLZ

my dad thinks the baby is his

Answer 1

dont say anything
its none of your business
your dad will find out on his own

Answer 2

I understand why your Mom doesn't want your Dad to know that the baby is not his. Obviously she made a mistake and is not ready to take responsibility for it. Has she had a paternity test done to be sure?

Regardless of how you found out, you know the truth and your Mom is asking you to lie. That's a heavy burden for a 13 year old to carry. If you don't say anything to your Dad, you spend the rest of your life living a lie because of a mistake your Mom made. Point this out to her and let her know you don't feel comfortable with it. Ask her to take some action of her own to resolve the issue one way or another.

I understand you're afraid your Dad might hurt her if they get into a physical fight. Again, that's not a responsibility you should have to carry. You can't handle this on your own. First talk to your Mom and ask her to help you through it. She and your Dad could use some counseling for their problems. If your Mom continues to ask you to lie, talk to a guidance counselor at school. They are required to keep things confidential so you don't have to worry about your secret getting out. Your guidance counselor may be able to come up with a good way to help you with this problem. Good luck to you and your family. This is not an easy issue.

Answer 3

i agree with everyone saying keep it to yourself. but that is a heavy burden for you to carry at 13. i know how you feel, my dad started hitting my mom when I was 9. I never felt ok again until I found God in my life through the church. You might want to try that out sometime. Maybe when you are older or if you can get someone to take you it would be good to join a youth group. It really really helped me get though the hard times. Remember you are not alone in the world, you have people who love you, God loves you and he is looking out for you. He would not give you anything that you could not handle. There are things in life to which we have no explanation for other than people are people, we are only human, and people, including our parents make mistakes and let us down. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Pray for God to help you and your family. He really helped mine and we were pretty screwed up back then. Remember things can only get so bad and then they have to get better and they will. Do good in school, work hard.

Answer 4

This is a very difficult situation for you. If you found out that means u must be a very smart girl. This is very strong information you have. There is no easy way out on this one. i recommend you think about the consequences for your mother, your dad, your brother and mostly for you. of tellingg and not tellin your dad. BUT whatever happens you have to remember you didn't screw up they did, absolutely nothing is your fault. If you have an adult Friend or family that u r 100% u confident in the you should tell them and have them help you. You parents are not perfect people and although you have every right to be mad at them I'm sure they love you. just remember that!

Answer 5

Unfortunately since you live with them it IS your business. I would talk to your guidance counselor & also your mom. Let your mom know it's NOT your responsibly to tell your father it's hers!! Also if you see them fighting go into another room & call the cops!! You shouldn't have to live with that!! Do NOT tell your dad that is your mother's job. Let her act like an adult not you act like the adult!!

I know you are scared & worried about the fighting but there is nothing you can do! I know that you see alot but you are a child & they both should be looking out for you not the other way around!! When I was growing up my mom & step used to fight verbally but I stood in front so she would not get hit. After he stopped drinking it got alot better!! You can also tell your guidence counselor that they fight & that you are scared. Hopefully someone will call CPS (child protection services) & get them both information on anger management, therapy, & domestic violence!! All the places an help!! If your parents are so unhappy that they have to be unfaithful when don't hey get a divorce!! Talk to someone in your school!

Good Luck!!!! Don't forget talk to someone no child should in that kind of envirment.

Answer 6

This is a tough one cause you are caught in the middle of something that you should not have to be a part of. You don't want to hurt either of your parents and it so unfair that you even have to be apart of this.
You need to let your mother know that you love her but it is unfair and very hard for you to keep this from your dad. Let her know that you are worried about her safety and concerned about your dad's feelings as well as hers. Ask her and encourage her to do the right thing and what is best for the family and then you let it go and try to move on. It is really on your parents to work this out and more so your mother to talk to your dad about what she did.
The biggest part is just talk to your mother.
I wish you and your family well. Good luck.

Answer 7

It's a very sad situation but unfortunently you can't really do much until you are 18. After that you can move out and leave this crazy house behind. But do it right. Move in with some friends, not a boyfriend. Don't repeat your mother's mistakes.

Answer 8

Don't say anything.It's best for you to stay out of it and let them solve this themselves.
It's not fair that she asked you to keep quiet about this but I really wouldn't say anything if I were you.
If you would go and talk to someone like a minister or a school counsellor,that would help you a lot and would not involve anyone other than you in your family.They can advise you best what to do.
Good Luck and God Bless.

Answer 9

Phew!! What a mess!! I am so sorry that you have had to carry such a burden at such a young age.

I believe that it would do you a lot of good if you could talk to somebody about this situation (As well as all the other stuff that I am sure you are going thru.)

Check out my sources below......I think they might be able to come alongside you and help you out some......

Bless your heart......

Answer 10

Poor thing this is a hard one you may want to talk with a preacher or another family member say an Aunt or Grand mother may be able to help you.

Answer 11

You could always go to your counselor in school, maybe they can help you. It always feels better to get in "off your chest" so to speak.

Since you live with this situation, i'd say it IS your business! Your parents need help sweetie, sometimes it takes someone else to make them SEE this is what they're doing to each other AND you kids!

Also, if thing get too much for you to handle, you know you can go to the authorities & they will make your parents get the help they need. I hope all goes well for you. (be safe!)