Should I bring a restraining order on my uncle?

Question

I am 15 years old, with not a very big father figure in my life due to my parents being divorced, so I have this uncle who is trying to take my place as a family member and as a father. IT IS NOT going to well. He is obsessive, calls me a liar, twists my words and calls me a **** up. Now, don't get me wrong, he means well, but he dosen't act out his feelings well. Every little thing I say is a lie to him and he lets me know it

So I made a plan with a family member and a family therapist. It's this method were if he starts harrassing me, I can say"While I respect your comments, I just cannot take you twisting my words and calling me a liar anymore, im sorry, but if you will act toward me like this I must hang up, please refer al comments to my mom. I did this tonight, and he went CRAZY! He came to the house (11 at night) calling me a punk, and demanding he be let in. After a short verbal skrimish and a police threat, he left. What should I do? Did I do the right thing?

P.S one time, he was pissed at me, SO HE GOT ME, AND MADE ME GO TO HIS HOUSE! AT 11 AT NIGHT! All he did was scream at me, next day I went home

Answer 1

Where's your Mom in all this? Even if your Dad's not in the picture, your Mom has to know what's going on. You don't deserve to be harrassed by this guy. She needs to let him know his place.

Can you call your family therapist to get his opinion? I'm not sure if there are age limits for getting a restraining order. I do know they're hardly worth the paper they're written on. If he shows up again, don't get into a verbal skirmish, don't threaten, just call the police. But do talk to your therapist to let him know how his suggestion went over.

Your uncle probably thought you were being a wisea** by saying what you did. He has some serious issues and your Mom needs to step in. Talk to your Mom calmly and without accusations or blame. Just give her the facts of what happened and ask her to do something about his involvement in your life. She probably thinks she's doing right by you by providing a male influence but does she know the actual influence he's having?

Answer 2

First of all, your mother should not let this happen to begin with. Second of all, don't threaten him with the police, call them and make a complaint. This kind of behavior isn't right nor is it healthy for your family at home. Call them yourself and tell the officer his background with you and that should seal up a resraining order. Do not let this man get to you and don't listen to his putdowns. You are not any of those things he says you are otherwise you wouldn't be showing him the respect that you do. As long as you stay in the right, you will always come out on top and have the upper hand.Good luck, honey and keep your head up and your hand on the phone.If you aren't comfortable calling the police, tell a teacher or preacher.That will get the ball rolling.

Answer 3

No. on the grounds which you're a minor, a criminal father or mom could choose to action for a restraining order on your behalf. in spite of everything, it is too previous due for a single indecent that for the time of the past (so long you do not undergo in suggestions the small print) to count now. Sorry i don't have greater useful information for you. sturdy success.

Answer 4

wow your uncle sounds like a freaking asshole... i wouldn't go as far as to get a restraining order on him, cause that goes on his legal record, it could keep him from jobs and stuff. and from what you told us he sounds like a guy who wants to be a dad but has no (and i do mean NO) idea how to do it. If he does what he did any more then tell your mom that you don't want to see him any more, if he persists then i would say go to the police. He has NO right to treat you this way and he is being totally unfair. I would say try talking to him, but with the typw of person that your uncle is most of the time talking doesn't work...
Good luck and i hope my answer helped

Answer 5

First of all, your mother should be involved in this somewhere. How is she related to your uncle? Is your uncle your mother's brother or your father's brother? Or is he (God help us all) a brother-in-law to your mom or dad? In either case, he doesn't have legal custody or guardianship rights, so you don't have to put up with his bs in the first place. If your mother won't support you in keeping this creep away from you, then talk to the family therapist and tell him/her what happened and ask if she can help you get a restraining order. Sounds to me like uncle has some emotional problems.

Answer 6

Sounds like you're enjoying the drama triangle. I am questioning why your therapist isn't talking to either one of them or both - doesn't have proof of any of the situations and yet telling you what to say to grown adults. Watch it those therapists will use you to tare your family apart by coaxing you to step out of line and forget your role in the family. Don't allow people to do that to ya. If you've lied in the past and not apologized or are not being honest now taking personal responsibility is something we do on our own.

Answer 7

Call the police on his rear end if he shows up at your home with threats like that...
Uncle or not... His behavior is unacceptable for an adult man..
Let him know it by having someone else tell him... :o)

Your mother also needs to put a stop to it...It's her responsibility, bottom line...

Answer 8

I agree with bon bon, go to a school councilor and tell her what is going on. Tell her that you are scared and ask her what steps can be taken to protect you from him. I don't know because of your age if you can get an order of protection or if an adult has to do it for you. But your councilor can help. Good Luck and I hope you are able to get the help you are asking for.

Answer 9

He has no right to force himself on you,next time he does you call thecops if they don't stop him go to legal aid,if you do make sure you tell them the whole story first you need to have a long talk with your mom,and let her know,no more.

Answer 10

What is your mom doing about this he has no right to act this way towards you. the best advice if your mom is not doing anything about this. talk to one of your school counsler maybe they can figure out what you can do. good luck and be safe.