Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself?
Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.
What is the purpose of reindeer? It makes the grass grow, sweetie.
There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided. At last report, the survivors were marooned.
The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up and asked, "Did you get my drift?"
Where do you find giant snails? On the ends of giant's fingers.
Why is Saudi Arabia free of mental illness? There are nomad people there.
When I was in the supermarket I saw a man and a woman wrapped in a barcode. I asked, "Are you two an item?"
I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him $50 that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, 'no, the steaks are too high.'
A guy walks into the psychiatrist's office wearing only Glad Wrap shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way
Question: How did Christopher Columbus finance his trip to America? Answer: With the Discover Card.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
Show me where Stalin's buried and I'll show you a communist plot.
When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.
A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables. The bartender says, "You can come in, but don't start anything!"
This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Four bucks," says the bartender. "Put it on my bill."
A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' fer the man who shot my paw."
2007-04-19 14:54:34 · 11 answers · asked by mysweetest666 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
haha thats Punny! haha get it?
2007-04-19 15:28:04 · answer #1 · answered by zachary k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ever heard of the eskimo who wounded himself with his seal harpoon? he died of cold cuts........or the time when the cops arrested a bloodied guy who they thought to be armed and dangerous but turned out that he's insane and has cut off his weiner? he turned out to be unarmed and just nuts
2007-04-19 15:28:10 · answer #2 · answered by bowen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta love em!
Very punny indeed!
.
2007-04-19 15:04:42 · answer #3 · answered by sniffels323 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL. Love'em all! LOL.
Thanks for the laughs!
2007-04-22 03:00:16 · answer #4 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lol
2015-09-17 08:41:46 · answer #5 · answered by trevor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if april showers bring may flowers do may flowers bring pilgrims?
2007-04-19 14:59:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I like those jokes.
2007-04-19 14:59:20 · answer #7 · answered by W 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol good ones
2007-04-19 15:08:56 · answer #8 · answered by bassooncrazy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
AHHHH those were awesome but they were terrible!!!
2007-04-19 14:59:50 · answer #9 · answered by sharksown92 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh wow, those are definitely puns! lol!
2007-04-19 15:42:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋