You have to help me! My bf is leaving for Iraq in about 2 months and I can't stop thinking about it. Its tearing me up inside. Ive tried to not think about it but I do anyways. Every hour I almost start crying. He hasn't even left yet and I'm this upset! How am I going to handle myself when he leaves....I'm going to be a miserable wreck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-04-19 11:35:47 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I too am a former veteran, and I hope you heed this advice, he needs you to be strong even if it is a lie on the outside, let him know he is your knight in shinning armor and how proud you are of him and his courage. I know he will be proud of you as well. This may sound corney but saftey is not the absence of danger but the presence of God.. You can go out every morning and evening before you sleep or awake and say good morning or evening to him in that direction , it will help you as well as him.face the west and talk to him, his heart will know you care and so will his soul. I know this will help your heart find peace if you feel you are actively doing something for you both.
may God bless and keep you both. I am very proud of you and him it takes two you know ,one to keep the home fires burning.He will need you to keep him sane like you will need him to keep you as well. This may help you both.
2007-04-19 11:48:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This may sound rather " un hip " but this is the moment in your life when you have to let it go ...this isn't about you ...you're not the center of the issue ....your bf's got a huge selfless heart and wants to go and do something that's bigger than he is. You need to trust that he's doing the right thing.
Now , go to the record store and buy the Kelly Clarkson that has the song " Jesus take the wheel "
She'll set you straight.
2007-04-19 18:42:37 · answer #2 · answered by Papillion 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've dealt with the long distance thing on a few occasions and it's always hard. Distance does make the heart grow fonder because you appreciate all the little things that you do together. I've heard that if you have five things to look forward to, you can keep yourself happy. That helped me.
Look forward to spending more time with your friends that you don't get to see very much and don't dwell on the geographic seperation with the bf.
DONT cheat on him (not that you would).
2007-04-19 18:45:35 · answer #3 · answered by prkr 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bless your heart. I can only imagine the agony you are feeling. But he will email and call when he can. And you will pray without stopping. Also, there are support groups where you can talk to other wives and girlfriends who are having the same emotions. God Bless Both of You and Keep Him Safe. Remember when he leaves you for the last time, you want to be your prettiest. That is what he will remember.
2007-04-19 18:43:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn. Sucks to be you.
My only suggestion is that you figure out how to deal. That sounds like it's pretty much a problem you are creating for yourself.
Things are going to happen that you just can't control. Get used to it. You won't be very useful to yourself or anyone else if you can't handle life.
Try talking to one of the spouse support groups. They'll probably help you out even though you're not married to him.
2007-04-19 18:39:49 · answer #5 · answered by w34p0n2m4n 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can only speak as a soldier myself who likely will get deployed there within the next year and a half or so.
I'm sorry you are going through that. I only know vicariously that it is not easy for family and friends of soldiers going there.
My first suggestion is if you are so upset that it is interfering with your daily functioning that you could go to counseling to help you out. It is a stressful thing and all of us could use this type of support at one time or another in life.
The second thing you could try as a way to deal with your emotions is to spend time talking to friends or family and to spend as much time with him now as possible.
Talk to him about how you will continue to email and talk to him when possible while he is gone.
Try to set up a support network now that will be there for you, such as friends, family, church, job support, that will help you get through it.
Most units have a family readiness group that is set up to help families and friends going through the effects of deployment with their loved ones.
They can provide people to lean on and to socialize with and to keep informed about the unit while it is over there.
Lastly, it hurts him a lot probably if you show him all the time how much you are stressed out.
It is good to let him know, but do not harp on it.
It makes it more stressful for a soldier if their family is not taking it well or does not show support for him.
Try to be strong for him because he needs that probably right now.
You could also channel your misery into supporting the unit as they get ready to go.
I'm sorry to hear that but you are not alone in your pain. I hope you connect with other friends and family of soldiers in his unit for support, at a minimum.
2007-04-19 18:45:18 · answer #6 · answered by KAR36 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My neighbor was in this situation. You should write to him every day, or at your convenience, and spend as much time as possible with him before he goes. Don't worry that your obsessing, this is a sign of a normal, healthy mind.
2007-04-19 18:40:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would feel the same way! But, he's going to fight for his country. You have to be very proud and supportive! He's already a hero in my eyes! Good luck!
2007-04-19 18:45:22 · answer #8 · answered by Truth Hurts 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's more to life than just him.. Yeah you'll worry, but keep in mind that this is something he has chosen. Think positive and keep busy.
2007-04-19 18:38:59 · answer #9 · answered by Мəəĸά 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No,don't cheat on him.But girl,you shouldn't be upset with him.Someday he is going to die,sooo...
Just continue your life.
2007-04-19 18:45:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋