My son was stabbed at school and the principal refuses to remove the attacker from school. What to do now?

Question

I filed a police report but the school refuses to punish this child beyond the standard, "You shouldn't have done that."

My 13 year old son was drumming his fingers in class when another 13 year old boy sitting next to him got "annoyed" and stabbed my son in the hand with a mechanical pencil to make him stop.

The boy is still in school, with little consequence, and my son is now afraid to go to school. How do I make the school do the right thing? The Superintendent is out of town until next week so I can't even talk to him about it.

Please help.

Answer 1

Show the principal a few current news paper headlines.

Talk with the other parents who have children in the same class as this violent child.

Discuss matters with the school counsellor.

Answer 2

I would definitely speak to the principal and the teacher involved about the fact that your son is now afraid to go to school. Your son has every right to feel safe at school. It's now their job to make sure he feels safe. He should not have to sit next to this boy in any class, preferably he shouldn't have to be in any class with this boy.

I can tell you how to get some results here. If you go into the principal's office ranting and raving and demanding that this other student be removed immediately, they will tune you out. Your focus needs to be on your son, and what the school can do for YOUR son. The rest of the students in that building are honestly not your concern here. You need to CALMLY and RATIONALLY request a meeting with the principal and the teacher involved. At this meeting, you need to remain calm, cool and collected. Respect the privacy laws that they must abide by, and realize that this protects all the students, your son included. Be respectful of the principal and the teachers involved, they have a very difficult job to do, they have to balance the needs of about 30-35 different teenagers in each classroom, keep everyone safe from harm, and in the meantime try to teach them enough so that they'll do well enough on the state assessment tests that they have to take now. I would keep my son home from school until you've had this meeting too, so request it soon.

While I realize stabbing your son in the hand with a pencil is bad, and shouldn't be ignored by anyone, I don't know if expelling the "attacker" from school is the best solution either. First of all, we don't have all the facts here, and neither do you. You don't know what was or was not done with the boy who stuck your son with the pencil. Yes, he's still in school, but is he doing detention after school? Maybe he's received in school suspension? Is the student a special education student on an IEP? Is your child on an IEP? And unless you were in the classroom when this incident happened, you don't firsthand know what happened either. The principal knows all this information, as does the classroom teacher, I don't, and you don't. Schools generally won't say what punishment another student did or did not receive, there's privacy laws involved.

You have to advocate for your son here. If you do so calmly, rationally and with a degree of professionalism, you will get the results for your son that you want. Establish the goal of keeping your child safe, and don't worry about what punishment other students do or do not get. Make your child your focus. Best of luck to you.

Answer 3

File a restraining order. Proceed a assault charge against the child. Notify the school of your actions. Asked that they be put in separate classes if possible. Proceed to ask for a formal hearing with the Principal and superintendent. Contact the guidance counselor and make her or him aware of the situation. Ask that they recommend, something done. Find out if the other child is a special needs child( different standards of removal and disciple).

Answer 4

You are not alone. To often I hear about conduct and behavior at my kids school that is illegal, dangerous and injurious to themselves and other children, and they get a slap on the wrist, very few get suspension or kicked out. Like any parent I expect schools and teachers to address educational needs of my children, but I am also a teacher and have had to deal with such problems for the welfare of the student and other classmates. When possible I address and assess the problem one on one, and often the issue is resolved. There is always more to the story then what happened in a single moment of an act that is like you described and it is sometimes hard to see the whole picture. There have been very few occasions where I did make a report to the local police about behavior problems, and a few times I did terminate students from the program. In my case it's my job to teach and if I don't have a student to teach I don't get paid, schools have to get funding based upon statistics or they don't get paid. It's really about the individual kids involved and it's my job to teach them. Many parents are involved in their child's education and many are not. It is important to listen and to talk with kids about what's really going on. I have to wonder what the right thing is for the school to do?

Answer 5

I am a mother too and I know waiting Is torcher, but try to wait for the superintendent. If he does nothing, then spred the word to others, the other child needs anger managment. Also try to contact the kids parents. The kid needs punishment, susspension, accidemic probation, but I am not sure about expulsion, troubled kids would love nothing more than to have no school. He needs an education. Good luck.

Answer 6

You should request that the attacker be suspended until the superintendent returns and the matter can be resolved, if this does not work I would press charges against the school, or even threaten to do so. This may get them scarred and willing to listen to reason.
I am sorry your son is afraid to go to school. School should be an enjoyable place for the child's mind to evolve, not one of fear and panic.

GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 7

a mechanical pencil, I understand being upset about it, but I think you are over reacting a little bit, Just tell your son to steer clear of this kid and what was he doing drumming in class? Some kids have a harder time learning and paying attention in class and it is disrespectful to distract and take away from them. But this kid may need some counseling to control his anger. There is obviously something going on here, maybe help the kid instead of crucify him? Why do you people thing this stuff keeps happening, help him before it is too late and spirals out of control.

Answer 8

unless it left a scar or was a bad cut or whatever nothing is going to be done much im 13 also and people shank or stab people with pencils all the time the boy will get suspended at most im sorry but thats all that will happen because this sort of behavior happens alot and usually people are just playing when they do it not meaning to hurt anyone really bad.

Answer 9

Well the child don't need to be taking out of the school the school need to start handling things before it get to the point of someone getting hurt. The teacher should have made the son stop from drumming on the desk before he got hurt.

Answer 10

Wow. That's not something really to mess around with. I'd wait until the sup comes back and see what he/she has to say, and if nothing, contact the child's parents etc..and let them know how that you know about the situation and plan to step forward if something happens again. This may sound like overkill, but keep documentation of things. You just never know, you know? I'd also write a letter to the school board to let them know what happened. I can remember in high school, my driving teacher who was a male made personal comments about my stepmother in front of the entire class, and she wrote a letter to the board on that. I know that's a totally different everything, but it sure ended it, you know?