Ok I been seeing this guy for almost 5 months now and things were just great at the begining. We couldnt get enough of eachother. We both have kids and he lives about an hour away so we dont see eachother everyday. Usually every 2-3 days. Well we used to talk on msn everyday, he would msg me usually in the morning to say good morning and goodnite too. And he would txt me everyday. Not no more. And when he does talk to me on msn he always takes so long to reply, almost like he's talkin to someone else. Also when i was at his house he turned off his msn/computer, whats up with that??? Almost like he's hiding something. I dunno something def doesnt seem right I just got that feeling. But alos my x cheated on me ALOT, is it just me being paranoid??? I hate this feeling. Also we're not seeing eachother as often as we used to. I just get the feeling something is not right. Help me please!!!
2007-04-19 02:11:29 · 5 answers · asked by missmindysue1981 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
And usually when I get this feeling with a guy Im dating, I'll dump him right away but I really like this guy and been dating him for along time now, I usually only date guys for no more than a month, I am very picky. Should I dump him???
2007-04-19 02:13:12 · update #1
Based on what you have said here, I would take a step back from that relationship. Become a little bit busier, see him less often, and contact him less online. This accomplishes two things:
1. It gives you a chance to reflect on your relationship beyond the daily ups and downs. He won't be around to remind you how much you like him, or how much he upsets you by shutting the computer off. Then maybe you can decide with a clear mind whether you really trust him or not, and how much it would devestate you if he WAS unfaithful. In other words, is it worth the risk?
2. It gives him a chance to miss you a little bit. Whether he is chatting it up online, or he is just more comfortable in the relationship so he doesn't feel like he has to give you the attention he used to, this might be a wake up call that you're slipping away. It will give him time to reflect on the relationship as well. If he really likes you, he will increase his attention towards you. If he doesn't show signs of picking it up a little, than he probably doesn't mind that the relationship is fading out, so that's something else to consider.
Good luck!
2007-04-19 02:27:15 · answer #1 · answered by Marilyn Green 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's fine to not live in eachother's pockets, and healthy to loosen up a bit, but if he's getting too distant and taking too long to reply, and turning off his computer, he may well have his interests going elsewhere or being more widely spread. So his attention and time with you is not quite so concentrated.
If that is the case, then move on. Believe me, don't waste your time in attempting to be number one, if he's got more going at once. Why should you be juggled?
If I was you? I would play the same game. Do not be so keen or quick to message him or keep in touch. Be more casual and distant about it. And yes he is up to something! He's turning of his msn/computer so you will not see what he's been saying and doing on there.
You answered your own question. Time to move on. He's the problem, let him go. If he wants to play games and start juggling you around and you're hanging on for his attention, hoping he will be as responsive as before, you are being a doormat and that is not fair on you.
You deserve better than that!
2007-04-19 09:26:34 · answer #2 · answered by Gus 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is easy. Trust your gut. Yes, he is seeing someone or SEVERAL someones probably online and off. When you get involved with a person who communicates a lot through IMs, you need to immediatley understand that the relationship is at a very high risk. People can lead you to believe what ever they wish you to believe about themselves through email or IM. It is an EASY sale. When the relationship goes OFFLINE, the cracks begin to appear in their veneer because the person can no longer play charades. Sounds like it got off to a good start, but because he could only keep up the act for so long it was easier for him to communicate with you via IM or email. This guy is weak and a coward. If you confront him, he will deny, deny, deny instead of being a man and telling the upfront truth. RUN GIRL, RUN.
2007-04-19 09:28:24 · answer #3 · answered by mzadamz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When things start changing, there is a reason for it. Have you both "committed" to a relationship or are you just dating? You may be either paranoid or just jealous. Neither one is good. You cannot control someone elses activities. This is especially true when you are as far apart as the two of you are. Time to either accept or reject the situation you are in.
2007-04-19 09:23:28 · answer #4 · answered by sensible_man 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I personally think that he does have something to hide, whether it's as innocent as he's getting nervous about how close you all are getting, so he's trying to exert his independance and hang out with his guy friends and talk to them more, or something more nefarious.
However no one knows what's going on in your man's head better than your man. You should ask him what's up even though that in itself is probably going to be hard. But it's better than wondering.
2007-04-19 09:45:19 · answer #5 · answered by The "Hmm" Girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋