I cheated on him about 5 years ago and we got married sence, then but i didnt think it would turn out like this!!! We both love each other so much and have been through things that a lot of pepole get divorced over,but to this day he cant trust me! I work hard every day,5 days aweek ,then come home to take care of the 2 boys.!!!! I cook,clean raise my kids and i am always there for him when he needs me!Gets mad because i have more guy friends then girls. Then when i do find a girlfriend he does not like her .Now he does not want me to hang out with her and we r close friends now!!It SUCKS!!!!!!!!He thinks i always go out when he leaves for work . If i do he still gets mad!! SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!!!!!
2007-04-18
18:19:51
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11 answers
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asked by
hotmomma
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in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
You must have hurt him badly and it will take time to get over it .. the only way you can gain his trust is by being fatihfull
suggest seeing a counsiler .. that might helpp he needs to get his feelings out and you need to talk about it openly and honestly .. and until that happens nothng will change because he lives everyday with the though that you did that.. sorry
and i belive that once you do it .. its easier the second time .
Its maybe not wrong to have guy friends as long as there his friends too but if not then you have no bussiness meeting new men friends no wonder he still has doubts about you .. I would too
2007-04-18 18:29:03
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answer #1
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answered by myopinionforwhatitsworth 5
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Well...ultimately he has to give that back to you. You must stay accountable and be a trustworthy person. Beyond that you need to really try and not let his behavior bother you. We could all be offended by something or we can choose to NOT be offended by someone elses behavior. Focus on more positive things. I'm sure he can sense your frustration at him (I know...I feel the same way sometimes-haha), but like a man, he probably totally misses where that frustration comes from and so naturally puts the worse "spin" on it...that you aren't happy with him and are just looking for an excuse to perhaps look for another man. He's feeling insecure...he'll have to deal with that, but you try not to show him that it bothers you and it should stop. Might want to rethink the importance of those "guy" friends as compared to your family? Uhmmm...maybe change your profile name to something other than "Hotmama"?
2007-04-18 18:39:46
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answer #2
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answered by Anonymous
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Tell him to get over it and treat you right. If you cheated on him such a long time ago and he married you since then, that means he should have forgiven you and forget about it. I know it is easier to say, but if there was such a problem then he shouldnt have married you. Also he needs to be more considerate to you because you also have children, what else does he want from you?
2007-04-18 18:26:00
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answer #3
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answered by jtgot1 3
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Five years and he still doesn't trust you?
Either you haven't done much to earn his trust back or he is just one of those people who cannot get over being betrayed. Sometimes it's like that.
You have to find out whether it's your lack of diligence or his inability to move on. Counselling would really help you both sort this out.
2007-04-18 19:49:55
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answer #4
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answered by Cassandra G 4
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HE has some real security issues that you cannot help, only a pro can. He is trying to control your life, do not let him...and for goodness sakes, your messing was a looooong time ago. If he isn't over that by now, he is just using it as an excuse to control you...do not let him, period.
2007-04-18 18:30:36
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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Trust is hard to get back...especially after cheating. Just keep reassuringhim. Try to be available for him and keep trying
2007-04-18 18:23:43
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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All that you can do is wait.With time,maybe alot of time,if you both want to keep this marriage/relationship alive.I understand what your going through.And from what I learned is time helps to heal all wounds.
2007-04-18 19:12:11
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answer #7
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answered by dubbz 3
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just do the best you can, it takes time for wounds to heal.. be strong, and patient. dont give up now..it can work out.. good luck
2007-04-18 18:29:33
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answer #8
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answered by wongfiehung2003 6
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thats the results ot the things you did in the past, i may be rude but i think you deserved it
2007-04-18 18:24:36
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answer #9
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answered by nap11t 3
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trust is hard to get back once you betrayed your marrage vows.as well him . he wont forget what you have done belive me on this matter. . in my opion?
2007-04-18 18:34:35
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answer #10
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answered by the_silverfoxx 7
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