How much allowance should i give my wife?

Question

My wife and I got into a fight today about her allowance. I have been giving her $20 dollars per week as allowance but she seems to think thats too little! You know women these days, they want everything. They need expensive starbucks lattes, fancy clothes, big gas guzzling SUVs so they can feel safe, etc. We've come to the conclusion that $20 isn't enough and we need to increase it.

So what do you guys think? I'll tell you what i think. I think she should get $40 per week. I think thats a reasonable number given my salary of 75k/year. We need to save all we can for a house, retirement, and college costs for the kids we'll be having.

Answer 1

You are kidding right? Who gives their wife an allowance? Is she your child or your spouse? Unless there are extreme circumstances such as her not being able to handle finances at all, you should not even discuss an allowance. She should have knocked a knot on your head the first time you brought it up. BUT if there are extreme circumstances other than buying the house(which will be hers also), retirement (that you may never live to see if you keep talking about ALLOWANCES),and college costs for kids that you may never have,(again, if you keep talking about ALLOWANCE I don't see a lot of baby making in your future), and you both agree to the ALLOWANCE, she should get as much to spend each week as you do. Take into consideration your travel expenses (because if you are on such a budget you should be brown bagging it yourself) and any other NECESSARY expenses and you should be able to come up with a nice amount that makes you both feel comfortable and not like a child. We earn significantly less, own our home- Pd for it in 12 yrs., have one child on his way to college, 5 vehicles(not new, but serves their purpose) and my spouse or I have never been on an ALLOWANCE. We would never treat each other with such indignity as to act as if one of us was a child. We have a spending plan and try to stick to it. Both of us. Sometimes we do, sometimes we splurge. I don't think life would be worth living if you don't really LIVE it. You can be stringent in your plans for the future that you forget to enjoy the NOW. Hope you guys come to some sort of agreement. Until you do, watch out for the frying pan.

Answer 2

I'm sorry but it astounds me that no one who answered addressed the fact that you give your wife an "allowance" like she's a 12 year old. She is YOUR WIFE, not your child. Even if she doesn't work, she should be regarded as an equal partner in your MARRIAGE. Marriage isn't a business. When you love someone, you share everything with that person. With that being said, I don't think she should have to ask your permission for the money. All money that comes into that home should be looked at as "our" money, not YOUR money even though you are the one who works for it. Now in order for that philosophy to work, I do understand you have to be married to someone who is mature and doesn't take money for granted. If you aren't married to someone like that, I can understand why you might restrict her a little. As for the plastic surgery, you need to pump up her self esteem. She should feel so loved & beautiful as she is. Make sure she's doing it for the right reasons. If you feel like she's thoughtfully considered all the risks & that she's making this decision because it will truly just make her feel beautiful, then I'd go ahead with it IF you have the money. But I wouldn't use money from retirement or any other investments for something frivolous.

Answer 3

You give your wife an allowance??? What kind of medieval relationship are you in?
My partner and I have an arrangement whereby he is the main breadwinner, he works full time and I stay at home and look after our child. His money is our money, my money is our money. Every payday, I have full access to the account, to pay the bills and fill the car with petrol and get groceries etc.
You and your wife should be equals. Share.
If you earn 75k a year, you can afford to be a bit more generous toward your wife. You want her to have your children, yet she isn't good enough for more than $40 a week? I question why you are even with her in the first place. And why are you worried about retirement? There's a little thing called super, which you should be contributing to every week anyway.

Answer 4

Allowance? What is that about? You two need to sit down and talk about financial planning and goals. Not all women need $5 coffee, SUVs and such! If you married one of these then, you picked her. Truthfully, when you get paid, take care of the bills, put some in savings, then the rest in a separate account for groceries and necessities. Necessities doesn't mean nonsense like $100 outfits, and such, it means the basics with a once in a while splurge - together! You are wise to save, and good for you! But, be reasonable - as well she must be too. Good luck.

Answer 5

If she is staying at home and taking care of the kids then she needs way more spending money than $20 dollars.

A woman needs to pamper herself every once in awhile, especially considering the hell she is probably putting up with. You make 75k a year, which in most areas is quite decent. That averages out to about $1500 a week.

I think that if you make $1500 a week, you can afford a little more than $20 to your wife, the woman that has given birth to your children.


You're complaining about $20 bucks a week? She needs to go after your *** for child support and alimony, and she'll get it. Depending on how many kids you have, you'll be paying $2000 a month to the state...

Answer 6

How much would you pay a house sitter? To just watch the house while you are on vacation and make sure the dog gets fed and the fish don't die?

In all honesty, I agree with the folks that said she should be earning her own money. But if you are the breadwinner, remember that no matter what the allowance is, your partnership is worth far more. She will never earn the wages you do if she only works at home, so be generous with compliments because housewifing is a thankless job.

Answer 7

First off 20 dollars a week isnt much at all, i mean how much do you spend a week...Second i wish my spouse would give me an allowance lol...Third No i dont know what you mean about women abd fancy clothes and lattes all women aren't like that. Ask her how much she wants if you think its to much try to make a compromise...If she's still pissed about it then she should get a job...thats the exact reason i always have one. Even when you are married its nice to have something thats your own.

Answer 8

it depends on whether your wife is working or a house wife. Whether the allowance is for her meals too or just for leisure.
Both of you should honestly workout with the financial planning for the family. Calculate how much savings needed per-month and expenses and bills, and future education expenses for th ekids and how much left over that can be used for leisure. If your wife is not working then $20 a month is really too little. But that's also depends on what sort of financial burdens you have. others cannot advice you. You have to plan for yourself.

Answer 9

I wouldn't know about that because my husband treats me like an equal and with respect. I am currently a stay at home mom, but when I need money I take it. I am an adult and my husband and I have the same priorities when it comes to financial matters.

Your wife is not a child...so stop treating her like one. I really feel bad for your wife. It sounds like she could have done much better.

Answer 10

Well first off I don't think that your wife is a child. She shouldn't be getting and "allowance".
The two of you need to get together and sit down and look at finances and tell her why you think that she shouldn't spend more then $40 a week. Explain to her the benefits of saving and such.
You also should be on a budget yourself. Not just her...

My Husband and I are on a monthly budget and I have chosen to have $20 a week to spend on things, as does my husband. It works out well.

We are also accountable to each other and if one of us wants to make a purchase over $20 then we give the other one a heads up.

And, not all women need Starbucks and expensive clothes. I would prefer to have more money in my savings acct. then all that stuff. I'll also stick to my minivan.