So, when my husband and I met ,the sex was pretty good. I always wanted it more, and would get annoyed if he wasn't in the mood. Tables have turned, I backed off. He's easy to please. Once a week, and he's good. So, I can provide him with that. More then willing to. But, my lover of 4 months and I reach multiple orgasms together. We are sexually built for one another. We spent 3 hot hours in the hot tub, followed by an hour long shower. How he has the energy for his wife, I don't know? The sad thing is, we are going to end up staying with our partners. He has a child with her. I've grown accustomed to a lifestyle I don't want to give up. Do you believe that it is okay to have a little something on the side? My very good friend once said........The main course is nothing without a little something on the side!). Can I make this functional? Can I make it work? What about you all, have you????
2007-04-18 16:18:18 · 22 answers · asked by Confused Chick 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
big answer no
the guy on the side and you WILL get caught and your hubby will divorce you
this stuff NEVER works
havent you seen Cheaters on TV??
2007-04-18 16:22:00 · answer #1 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
very sad for your husband. how can you face him, still sleeping beside him, while you have your own concience that you are betraying him & hurting him. Aren't you feeling guilty with your lover's family and his kid too?
try to work out with your own marriage. Sex is only a temporary physical pleasure. You get old one day, when u no longer have high sex drive. When you reach that stage, what you want in life is just a caring husband and children to be by your side.
Talk to your husband about you wanting more intimacy. Go for holidays together. Go for counseling if you need to. Just don't cheat behind someone's back. It's better you divorce him and remarried with someone else single or divorcee. But don't break the happiness of other's family.
2007-04-18 16:32:22 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did you get married in a church? Are you religious? Can you look your husband in the eye? Can you tell your husband about this? If not, why not? Maybe because it's wrong?
2007-04-18 19:01:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO NO NO!!!!
SOOOOOOOO wrong!
If you have to hide it then it is not right and he WILL find out eventually and be VERY VERY hurt!
Do yourself and him a favor ...either get a divorce, counseling or get the heck out of that affair NOW!
Your appetizer, dinner and desert should be your husband... period! You shouldn't have gotten married if he wasn't enough for you.
2007-04-18 16:37:50 · answer #4 · answered by ♥ PrincessLeia ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what kind of husband do you have. There are marriages like this. But i suppose, the marriages it self funtioning for social merits only, not personal merits. Then, love and lust could be get long together if you got the right person. If you dont and should choose one, life will be a bit hard.
You need an attchment rather just a lust. Hm...i wonder why your husband enough with sex only once a week, i suppose that either he doesnt so much interisted in you or he has hormonal problem, or he has....?
so, get knowing even better of your husband and do the action you need and read the book of HELEN FISHER!!!
then decide. You are now in the phase of crisis in most period of early marriage phase. Either you and or your husband.....
2007-04-18 16:44:25 · answer #5 · answered by tresyabedkowska 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
QUIT BEING SO SELFISH!!!! I find people like you who ONLY think of themselves, really pathetic.
Grow up and respect your husband, he's the person you married. What you doing by going behind his back is disrespecting him, and you don't love him if your cheating on him. Obviously you don't take your wedding vows very seriously.
2007-04-18 16:22:25 · answer #6 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This isn't a win/win situation... and I don't know how to make it work.
It could be love or lust with the lover, but what are your feelings for your husband?
It doesn't feel like love to me, and I'm far removed. He is close to you; he will feel it. And you will teach him to doubt his insight, his loyalty, his trust, and his love, (among other things), which also doesn't feel like a loving thing to do.
As great as your position seems, I don't envy it, and I don't know how to make it work. Someone has to have made it work in the past, and I'm all about doing what works, but this situation is sad...
2007-04-18 17:20:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All I have to say is proceed with caution. If you have become accustomed to the life your husband has provided, you might want to be very careful of the event that you and your lover get caught.
2007-04-18 19:16:38 · answer #8 · answered by Jae C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that neither one of you DESERVE your marital partners and should be ashamed. They have a right to know what you're doing behind their backs. I am married and would be furious if my spouse game me a fatal disease just because she felt like it. They should have the say in whether or not they want to take that chance with their lives, that is not you or your lovers decision. Masterbate if your spouse don't give it enough, don't cheat. Or, do them a favor and just leave.
2007-04-18 16:25:58 · answer #9 · answered by Tim F 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Your husband has no idea that his wife is having sex with another man. I'm guessing that since you have such a nice "lifestyle", he is helping to provide you with that. You're having sex with him once a week, I assume he loves you.
The deception is incredible. Don't you feel anything about this? Guilt? Any remorse, whatsoever? It just sound so incredibly selfish. Plus,this guy your having the affair with is deceiving his wife. Thwe whole thing stinks....really bad. I just hope you don't have children.
2007-04-18 16:32:01 · answer #10 · answered by Eve 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋